45 years old and pregnant 1st time...

[Fleetfox1]

So, this is my first time posting on here.....

I'm 45 and never thought I would have kids. 3 years ago I met the love of my life after 20+ years in an abusive relationship where I was blamed for not getting pregnant. I stopped contraception in December because it didn't agree with me and I wasn't going to get pregnant, right?

I've done a pregnancy test this morning and I'm 4 weeks pregnant (ish). And I'm terrified. This wasn't part of my plan, or my partner's, but equally neither of us could think of a better person to have a child with.

I don't really know what I'm asking, I'm just scared atm. There are so many risks you hear about with an older mum but equally according to science this shouldn't have happened .

Experience and advice gratefully received .

@Grinchpyjamasalready Ah, we're in the same boat, that's lovely to know x

And yup, I'd be 45 (birthday next May), would you be as well?

I have two friends both had tried without success for years to conceive and both became pregnant at 45+
Both had no issues with pregnancy nor their labours and seeing their updates over the last year have been a joy to see. Huge congratulations to you.

I’m currently 43 will be be 44 this month and I’m 35 weeks pregnant. I’ve had no issues bar Gestational diabetes but I’ve had that in my last 2 pregnancies so don’t think it’s age related. Good luck and congratulations, enjoy every moment of this

Congratulations. There is a big difference between concieving naturally at 45 and having intervention to do so. Lots of women experience a final flush of fertility befpre menopause. Sounds like your body is able to have a child. Are you generaly healthy? I had my last at 43 which is not much different. Now you just have to wait. I hope it sticks for you. I went private for screening as only the basic blood test was offered in my area. I came back as high risk for downs but now realise that was my age that made the result like that. The nipt test was conclusive.

Congratulations, however old you are a surprise pregnancy rocks you a little. This is your happy ever after enjoy it xx

I’m an older parent, 47 at the time. We now have two teenagers. It has been amazing, so much fun, keeping us young. We are much poorer and I can’t retire even though I want to but the pleasures are immeasurable. Congratulations.

@Fleetfox1 How are things going?

Fleetfox1 how are you getting on

Hi @Fleetfox1 how are things going? X

And @Grinchpyjamasalready have you decided if you'll try again?

Hope you're all well and had lovely Christmases :) x

Hi!

I just turned 44 and I want to have a child. My husband is older and I have no support from family. I need to build my own village if I will have one. I already have frozen embryos. I don't have yet pregnancy related worries. It is something I discuss with my doctor already.

I have other worries. I have friends around me who became first time parents in their early to mid 40s. They try to keep up with their babies and toddlers like mothers of any age regardless of their energy levels. But I know noone who has children over 20+ who became parents in their early to mid 40s. If you are one, can you share your experience. I know everybody's experience is unique but I believe we still learn from eachother.

Regards ❤️

I was almost 46 when I had DS. He’s now 14. Honestly, I don’t think my life or my relationship with my son is any different to that of younger friends. I would say I am probably unsual for an almost 60 year old, I am still working at a high level in a v interesting role, go to the gym a lot, am quite on trend with how I dress and am told I look much younger. I am convinced some of what’s kept me young is having a young child. I have never been excluded by younger Mums - my closest friend is 35!

I had no family around me. DP and I have brought DS up between us - juggling our careers etc to ensure someone was always at home.

There is no ideal time to have a family - some will be on here saying it’s selfish and wrong to have a child when you’re older. I had a lot of miscarriages and so it wasn’t a choice as such. Even if it had been, it’s no one else’s business IMO.

Good luck 😉

I hate to break it to you, but the chance of miscarriage at 45 years is 60-80%. I wouldn’t go making any big announcements or plans yet 🫤

You know this thread is from Sept 2022?!

Zombie 🧟

Yes better Op waits until child starts school