I don't know how to answer this question

[TeddyTonks]

Expecting number three and have a boy and girl already. Constantly being asked what I'd like third to be. Feels like an odd question, almost asking me if I prefer DS or DD. Obviously love them both to bits, equally! Can't even begin to figure out how I'd have a preference. Just seems like an odd question, I'm not annoyed by it, just a bit perplexed. Can imagine being asked if you're hoping for 'X' when you have 'Y' is very annoying though!

I guess people are just saying something to make conversation 🤷🏼‍♀️

"As long as its healthy I'll be happy"

I had the same experience with my first. I didn’t have an opinion on which sex I would prefer and even if I had had an opinion, it’s not something you can choose anyway. People would persist until I gave some kind of answer though sonI started saying we’d chosen a girl’s name but hadn’t decided on a boy’s name so it would be easier if the baby was a girl. A similar stock answer might help you deal with the stupid question. Or ´DS would like a little brother, DD would like a little sister.´

Just say “A baby.” 😂

@TheBirdintheCave that is actually the answer I've been giving 😂

I'd say 'healthy'

DD wants a dinosaur and DS wants a unicorn, but we'll just have to wait and see!

I used to go for 'puppies!'

I always say I want a healthy baby. That's the truth

"Oh a puppy" 🤣

Or just say "oh you don't need to get me a present " and walk off

@girlmom21

Or just say "oh you don't need to get me a present " and walk off

For some reason I misremembered your OP and thought they were asking what you want

After going through HELL with my DS as a newborn the only answer to what you want them to be should be "a good sleeper"!

@PollyPutTheKettleOnKettleOn

"As long as its healthy I'll be happy"

There was a thread on here a few years back where someone replied that and got a bollocking, as someone in the friend group had a disabled child.

I think it’s just one of those questions people ask a where they don’t really care about the answer but feel they need to ask something, iyswim. I doubt there’s any malice in it.
‘I don’t mind’ is what you’re supposed to say!

@LeftieLucy thats a good point. I don't have a disabled child but when I hear someone say this I don't take it as they wouldn't love a disabled child but that any new parent wants their child to be healthy and safe.

I don’t think people really care what you prefer? It’s just one of those questions that people ask. Just say you don’t have a preference.

[quote PollyPutTheKettleOnKettleOn]@LeftieLucy thats a good point. I don't have a disabled child but when I hear someone say this I don't take it as they wouldn't love a disabled child but that any new parent wants their child to be healthy and safe.[/quote]
I agree. My third child has a disability and I still wished for my 4th to be healthy. Doesn’t mean I love them less.

Just say you don’t mine other way, no need to Over think it it’s just small talk.

Mind either!! wish there was an edit button

I feel the same that people are so shocked that we are not finding out what we're having. we didn't last time and had a girl, we're not this time either because we don't now covet a boy so we have one of each so are in no rush to know. People don't get it and constantly say 'I don't know how you do it Id need to know' I genuinely don't care, boy or girl I want a healthy baby and that all I wish for. Or say they need to be organised and get prepared, well I'm preparing for a baby who either way needs a safe place to sleep, milk and a clean bum 🤣🤷🏽‍♀️ am I mad or am I missing something here?

I same this once and was told " A human baby. " brilliant blunt response delivered with aplomb and grace -it got the point across perfectly.

My husband used to respond: "either would be wonderful"
It is an annoying question. Like most random pregnancy related enquiries. The person doesn't consider how many times you've been asked the same thing.

I asked *

Same situation here. Dd wants a sister and ds wants a bird.

@BabyB19

I feel the same that people are so shocked that we are not finding out what we're having. we didn't last time and had a girl, we're not this time either because we don't now covet a boy so we have one of each so are in no rush to know. People don't get it and constantly say 'I don't know how you do it Id need to know' I genuinely don't care, boy or girl I want a healthy baby and that all I wish for. Or say they need to be organised and get prepared, well I'm preparing for a baby who either way needs a safe place to sleep, milk and a clean bum 🤣🤷🏽‍♀️ am I mad or am I missing something here?

I found out with my last baby as the genetic disability my son has more prevalence in boys, so I wanted to be prepared for the chance my next baby could also have it.

A colleague bought an early sex reveal scan as her partner was dying and wouldn’t make it to the anomaly scan - he wanted to die knowing if he had a son or a daughter.

A friend found out because she wanted to move house before giving birth if the baby was the opposite sex to the one she had.

My sister found out because she wanted to buy gender specific clothing.
The second time she found out because she wanted to know whether to save the clothing or sell it to buy for the opposite sex.

No one way is the right or wrong way. No way is the ‘better’ way. There’s no need for sanctimony from either ‘side’

@LeftieLucy there was nothing sanctimonious about my post. I don't feel I'm superior to anyone.
There will always be exceptions, I however have none of these issues luckily and so there is still no relevance to people asking me personally. Have a good day.