Attending a wedding with 300 people Boxing Day?

[HotChocolate16]

Evening everyone

My brother in law is getting married on Boxing Day. There will be 300 people attending. I will be 16 weeks pregnant. I’m really worried about it but it’s not something I can really not attend. What would everyone else do? I’ve had 2 jabs but not my booster

In an ideal world you and your family could all avoid such events for health and safety reasons. But as your husband and daughter will be there, whatever they pick up from the party they will bring home, so unless you board yourself up in the spare room and isolate from them until it's established they managed to avoid catching covid, it's unlikely you'll avoid exposure by not going.

So I don't know. Not going won't guarantee you won't come into close contact with covid. You can do two things, accept that it's unavoidable and go have fun, or take the chances that your immediate family won't give it to you and stay home.

It is a damn shame that the situation is what it is now, as the most sensible thing would be to call the whole thing off and rearrange for later, but a wedding of that size will have been in the planning for a long long time, and a lot of money and effort tied to it, so it's not quite so simple.

I’d go in first or second trimester but not third as that’s when covid risk really increases for pregnancy.

Just seeing your thread Op - this is so tough for you and the whole family. It's horrible for you to miss it, but also going is such a concern. In your position, I'd fake illness to get out of going.

Your DH and DD should still go as it would be a shame for them to miss out. Even if they do catch Covid, you wouldn't necessarily get it too - I'd distance myself from your husband for 10 days after to be safe. Harder to do with your DD but it's still possible to an extent - we've had Covid in our house a couple of times and each time, only the person infected had it. None of the rest of us caught it from them!

Good luck with whatever you decide.

My stepson just told me he caught covid at a wedding last weekend (he wfh so rarely goes out). He was supposed to host his in laws. They'll be eating turkey for weeks now.

It’s a cultural wedding hence lots of people.

What does that even mean? All weddings are cultural weddings in the culture of the people who are getting married.

We get it. It's an Indian/Pakistani wedding and we know they like to invite every single person that both sets of parents ever met, including the bank manager, their business associates and their dentist.

That doesn't make it any more 'cultural' than my wedding was, with 22 white British people at it.

Anyway, don't go. Feign dreadful sickness. It's not worth the risk.

@HotChocolate16
Did you go to the wedding?

Yes I went in the end. I just felt too bad for not going.

It wasn’t that bad and a lot of the time I was sat down alone with my son in his pram trying to get him to sleep.

It’s extremely selfish for such a big wedding to have gone ahead. Did the organisers not even think about others. I don’t even know 300 people yet because it’s seen as a cultural wedding it’s ok to do?

@Franklin12

It’s extremely selfish for such a big wedding to have gone ahead. Did the organisers not even think about others. I don’t even know 300 people yet because it’s seen as a cultural wedding it’s ok to do?

Unfortunately they'd most likely have lost thousands of pounds if they didn't go ahead with it. Most wedding venues cannot refund couples because they are worried unless the government bans them.

"Unfortunately they'd most likely have lost thousands of pounds if they didn't go ahead with it. Most wedding venues cannot refund couples because they are worried unless the government bans them."

Exactly this. Not to mention that there may have been loads of people flying in from abroad who would have found it complicated to cancel at such short notice. For an event that size I wouldn't be surprised if the planning had started before covid was even a thing, with the venue booked two years ago.