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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Why do people lie about their due date?

28 replies

Dalooah · 14/12/2021 16:58

Can anyone explain this to me? Whenever someone is pregnant (largely DPs family, as no many on my side) there's always discrepancies with due dates- as in, clear lying about when baby is due.

I completely understand being vague 'due in May/End of the year' etc but why do people feel the need to be specific but then lie about it?

Someone in DPs family mentioned their
pregnancy very early on to DP and said due date is XYZ but seems to have forgotten this conversation and now, 4 weeks out, is telling everyone including DP that due date is 6/8 weeks out depending on the week! 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ The only reason we've picked up on the discrepancy is that the actual/original date mentioned was a significant date and memorable.

Can anyone shed some light on possible reasonable reasons for doing this?

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Fundays12 · 14/12/2021 17:01

To stop getting hassled from 37 weeks with comment such as "you not had that baby yet" or "get a move on and get the baby out". First time I was so fed up i swore I would not say my exact date if I hot pregnant again. Ironically baby 2 and 3 were early though ds1 was late.

namechange30455 · 14/12/2021 17:02

I "lied" about my due date (as in I said it was "late X month" when my due date was actually the 13th) to stop people asking if I'd had the baby yet as soon as we hit the due date! They're probably doing that.

Are you sure their dates haven't changed, if they mentioned it very early - the due date could have been revised?

Orangedaisy · 14/12/2021 17:02

Don’t want the fuss around ‘have you had it yet?’, takes the pressure off. Possibly only thought of this well into the pregnancy. Or possible MIL is threatening to turn up for the weeks before birth so trying to get it out of the way before she does! Maybe I’ve been reading too much mumsnet…..

LyraVega · 14/12/2021 17:02

Probably because people get mithered for updates as their due date approaches?

Or maybe after a scan she had her due date moved?

Original poster

Dalooah · 14/12/2021 17:33

Hadn't thought of being hassled. It's never actually crossed my mind to ask someone why the baby hasn't arrived etc. but it does make sense.

LOL we were shown the official due date on the dating scan 'paperwork?' How easily baby brain affects the couple!

OP posts:

dustandfluf · 14/12/2021 17:50

Because your due date is just a guesstimate anyway. Its based of your period dates in early pregnancy then can change when you actually have a scan that takes the growth of baby into account.

dustandfluf · 14/12/2021 17:51

It's nothing to do with 'baby brain'. I hope you've not said that them!

TheWayTheLightFalls · 14/12/2021 17:53

What everyone else said. Telling people the actual date seems madness. Though I had twins and got badgered from about month six.

didireallysaythat · 14/12/2021 17:56

So your MIL doesn't start ringing hourly, with the intention of setting off to come to your as soon as you go into labour.

MintJulia · 14/12/2021 17:57

To stop people ringing every five minutes from 7am on due date !!

Plus my midwife changed her mind regularly. She had no more idea when ds was coming than I did.

MeltedButter · 14/12/2021 17:59

The due date does tend to change early on though.

Strangevipers · 14/12/2021 17:59

Cause it's no one else's business

Atla · 14/12/2021 18:02

Have you had that baby yet?
How about now?
How about now?

AwkwardPaws27 · 14/12/2021 18:04

My pregnancy book actually recommended adding two weeks on to prevent being badgered.
My dates have been adjusted a bit following a scan.
Does it really matter? Only 5% of babies come on their "due date".

Beautiful3 · 14/12/2021 18:08

I think i was given an estimated due date, as I couldn't remember the date of my last period. When I had my scan, they gave me more accurate dates, bit later than previously said.

Mummmaa · 14/12/2021 18:09

Ill be saying my due date but i know ill be having a planned c-section but wount be giving that date out to many so im not bombarded with messages whilst waiting to go in! I certainly wount be making any group chats this time round. With my first i made a group chat with all my family and close friends so i just have to send one message to update whilst in labour etc yet every person in the group thought they were more entitled to have more updates and would message me privatley too! Drove me up the wall and i ended up putting in the group chat that me and partner are now focusing on the birth and we will update once baby is here. So this time round half of me just wants to tell just the person who will be looking after my son when im going in to have the baby and tell eveyone else a later date!

Novasmummy · 14/12/2021 18:11

I remember my midwife saying to me once "we call it a due date but really it's a due month" if I ever had another baby I would tell people the date at 42 weeks as my due date not 40 weeks, because by 38 weeks all people could ask me was why I hadn't had the baby yet? Ridiculous

Holskey · 14/12/2021 18:15

I genuinely don't mind getting messages asking if I've had the baby 🤷‍♀️ But a lot of people do so it makes sense to avoid that scenario by giving a false date. As for the lie, a lot of people won't accept vague "mid February" type answers and want to know the specific date you're given.

Change123today · 14/12/2021 18:17

We kept it vague as I knew it was going to be a planned c-section and only wanted close family members to know that date. Just meant we had a chilled few days before and on the day. Was nice surprising everyone once she was born. I have a high risk pregnancy/birth so didn’t want to worry anyone!

blablablack · 14/12/2021 19:00

I've never had that before. Maybe say beginning/middle/end of month they are due. That might be with a colleague or someone I don't know too well but with actual family I wld always know the due date.

Chely · 14/12/2021 19:10

I didn't tell many people my due date with the last one. People were asking "have you not had that baby yet" from about 34wks because I was big, she came out 10lb 15oz at 38+6. I didn't tell people about being planned in for an elcs at 39wk either, good job as she decided to come a day earlier anyway.

FTEngineerM · 14/12/2021 19:11

BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE ANNOYING AS FUCK WHEN YOURE FULL TERM PREGNANT

Worryworry887 · 14/12/2021 19:20

I also am having a planned c section and am very anxious about it (just have anxiety no reason to be!) I wanted to keep the date vague but it kind of slipped out to a few people, and now I’m getting constant well meaning messages asking how I am, are you excited, good luck and I’m finding it all very stressful and adding to my anxiety . I wish I had only told close family and then lied and said a week later to everyone else.

Worryworry887 · 14/12/2021 19:22

I mean, i wish I was excited but I’m not, I’m terrified 🤷‍♀️ Pretending to be excited for everyone else is tiring haha

sociallydistained · 14/12/2021 19:30

I so wish I lied now! But with two jobs I had to tell employers the correct due date and didn’t think at the time about the harassment. I’m only 34 weeks but I can feel the “any signs” conversations coming and I dread it during my maternity leave. I’m end of Jan and told everyone the exact day and wish I said 2 weeks after now. But hey ho

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