I can't cope with this TTC journey anymore. I'm desperate :(

[alittleacorn]

So DP and I have been TTC our first for over a year now, and have had no joy.
We have had what we thought were chemical pregnancies (2 now) but I'm doubting that they were after reading into how awful FRER tests can be. We had faint positive lines on the FRER tests that we took, to which I'm now wondering if they were indents.

I don't know what to do. I'm so desperate for a baby it hurts. My heart aches, I just don't know what to do with myself.

I was on the implant for 7 years total, and took it out over a year ago. Could this be something to do with it...? I have regular 12 weekly blood tests too and they've all come back fine.

What hurts me the most is that today a close friend had her gender reveal. It only took them a month to conceive. I'm so so happy for them but I just can't help but to feel sad.

Sorry for the rant. I just don't know where to turn. I feel like I'm becoming depressed.

@hopefulsunshine11

Hi,

Reading some of these responses has terrified me!

We are ttc and I only started taking 5mg folic acid again last week after reading the comments. When I fell pregnant the last time that resulted in miscarriage the midwife prescribed me them. Now I'm terrified that if I do fall pregnant soon the baby will have defects. Is there a statistic? Surely not all obese pregnancies have serious complications and I'd like to hear some positive stories! Do these defects get picked up at the 12 week scan?

For me, it was discovered at my anomaly scan. My BMI was 30 at booking in. My baby had spina bifida which is a neural tube defect which can't be detected at the dating /NT scan.

As long as you've been taking them for at least a month prior to falling pregnant, it starts to build up in your system.

My MW told me that you can't take too much folic acid, so if you're taking 5mg and then a pregnancy vitamin with the regular daily amount in too its OK.

Not all obese/larger pregnancies have issues, most don't, but you are still at a higher risk of complication and its important to recognise that prior to falling pregnant and taking the right vitamins and eating well etc is the best thing you can do for yourself and your future baby.

Hi OP, sorry if this doesn't help but I also found TTC absolutely soul destroying and was desperate for anything that might help. I ended up taking soy isoflavones twice and conceived both times (I miscarried our first). It could have been a coincidence but we were trying for a while without success.

There's loads of threads on the TTC board discussing it, so just search for "soy isoflavones". Absolutely not a replacement for fertility treatment but worth a shot whilst you wait for tests? It does depend on your cycle; if you're very regular and have no issues then you might not want to introduce additional hormones. I had a short luteal phase (8 days) that I suspected might be making it harder.

The other thing is that my sister was TTC for 3 years, her specialist suggested she try the keto diet. She was borderline PCOS so not even diagnosed but nothing was happening. I don't think you should consider it without medical supervision as it is quite extreme, but it can help in specific circumstances. She did it for about 3 months I think and fell pregnant. She stopped the diet as soon as she was pregnant as advised by her doctor.

She's vegetarian too so it mainly involved a lot of cheese and coconut oil I think! It was really, really strict (like you can't eat most fruit because of the sugar) and she had to prepare every single thing she ate herself, which was time consuming and annoying. But perhaps something to discuss with your doctor.

Good luck with everything xxx

Haven’t read the whole thread but just wanted to say, please don’t stress about your weight, plenty of women who are overweight have no problems conceiving, myself included. That’s not to say you shouldn’t try to lose, but don’t stress yourself out with it, just try and make healthier choices. Good luck!