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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Can new born sleep in own room straight away?

84 replies

dolly1 · 13/12/2007 17:27

Says it all really. We were planning to pop him in the nursery from day one. It's not far from our room and I'd rather get up in the night and go through to make sure he gets used to his own room asap.
Is this a good idea or not? Any advice/experiences would be great - thanks

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

barbamama · 13/12/2007 18:38

I went for a bit of a happy medium on this - both babies were in our room if not bed for the first 3 months then in their own room next door with both a breathing monitor nd an audio monitor. This works well for us. Second time around we have recently put our 3 month old in the same room as his 3 year old brother which sounds mad but is working surprisingly well. makes me feel better as the baby is not alone in the room and hopefully has the benefits of hearing his brother breathing etc. As much as I would never put a newborn in bed I have to confess that by the 3 month mark I was desperate to have my room back as I really need to read before going to sleep to relax and unwind properly and it would wake the baby up when we came up to bed later.

Having said all this, I know many people who put babies in their own room from birth despite the 6 month guideline. My SIL is French and apparently that is the norm. You have to do what feels right for you when teh time comes and you won't know until you get there. Just go with the flow. The snugglenests are brilliant for newborns for the first few weeks and, incidentally, I have one for sale if you're interested.

barbamama · 13/12/2007 18:40

As much as I would never put a newborn in his own bedroom I meant

NineUnlovelyTinselDecorations · 13/12/2007 19:04

Just to counter those who said they put their baby in their own room from x days/weeks/months, my cousin died from SIDS in his own room at 3 months. It does happen. It's completely your choice but just remember that although the statistics are low, somebody's baby will die

I think a lot of people change their minds (from whatever it was when they were pregnant) once the baby is born. Some can't bear to be without the baby, some can't bear the snoring!

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 19:59

i have dt now 7 we never had enough room in our bedroom for them to share so it was never an option, we didn't use a monitor as they were only next door.
If a baby is going to die from SIDS it will, whether it is in your room or their own. I have personally known 2 people who had their babies sleep in with them and they died from SIDS.

Magrat · 13/12/2007 20:01

oh I'm sorry but that's not right drinkmoretea .. please read the SIDS link I'm sure it explains the research and increased risk for babies who can't hear their parents breathing .. that does not mean that SIDS does not happen when room-sharing just the risk is lessened .. it's always about lessening risk

NineUnlovelyTinselDecorations · 13/12/2007 20:06

Sorry to hear about your friends' babies drinkmoretea but Magrat is right.

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 20:11

but knowwhere does it say that just by having the baby in the same room will prevents SIDS

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 20:12

it says its the safest place to be but doesnt elaborate on that.

skerriesmum · 13/12/2007 20:13

Dolly1 I'm in Canada and have seen them at Wal-Mart (maybe not that exact brand name) so you could try Asda or any big baby shop.
Here's what I'm talking about (I can't do links but you could search on jojo site).

www.jojomamanbebe.co.uk/detailfash.php?type=FASH&code=A7423&branch=IF&category=GST7 2

moondog · 13/12/2007 20:14

I wouldn't.

It gived me the creeps thinking of a tiny baby all alone.

As for the baby 'disturbing one's sleep' well gosh, I kind of thought that was part of the job description. If I didn't want any extra upheaval in my life I would have stayed childless.

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 20:14

there is not any scientific evidence to suggest that being in a cot next to you as opposed to another room in the same conditions ie same temperature will prevent SIDS.

JingleyJen · 13/12/2007 20:16

Both DS's were in their own rooms earlier than 6 months DS1 week 6 and DS2 week 3.

Once we had established breastfeeding and things got into more of a pattern at night we moved them because they were soooo noisey!

However I think you will have to wait and see how you feel.

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 20:17

and yes its easy when you have one baby to fit them in your room but when there are two or more its a different matter, and people are suggesting that parents that dont do this (ie parents of multiples) are being unreasonable and 'bad' parents.

Snaf · 13/12/2007 20:18

There are no cast-iron guarantees, dmt. And yes, babies who sleep with their parents do also die. But there is excellent evidence to show that having your baby in your room reduces the risk of SIDS.

The exact mechanism isn't really known, and there are lots of competing factors in SIDS, but it's thought that sleeping close to the parent helps a newborn to regulate their own breathing, and allows a parent to be more tuned-in to their baby's sleep patterns and therefore more likely to wake asap if there is a problem.

I can't see the issue, tbh.

iliketojinglethembells · 13/12/2007 20:19

I dont know what SIDS is but i personally wouldnt be able to sleep if my little one wasnt in the room with me and i couldnt wake up 5,0000 times a night to see their little chest rising and falling! Its a personal decision but imho not a nice one for the poor little baby to wake up in the middle of the night and cant find mummys smell theres no body there etc etc

I got mine used to their cots (they were in moses baskets freom day one till they outgrew them) but i put them in cots in there rooms for their naps in the daytime then night time they were next to me. Swap over was pretty easy although i had a monitor on all the time! im just paranoid though lol

iliketojinglethembells · 13/12/2007 20:22

mind you, my dc are 7, 6 and 4 and i still have to see their little chests rise and fall before i go to bed is it normal or am i just a complete paranoidaphiliac??

Magrat · 13/12/2007 20:22

people always fight against latest research when it contradicts what they did with their children ... I know it's natural but it doesn't make sense to be proliferating incorrect information just because it worked for you

I weaned ds at 12 weeks .. I did it because that was the information available at the time, doesn't mean I don't accept that the new weaning at 6 months advice doesn't offer the best advice based on current knowledge

moondog · 13/12/2007 20:22

SIDS is Sudden Infant Death Syndrome aka cot death

iliketojinglethembells · 13/12/2007 20:24

oh i see!

drinkmoretea · 13/12/2007 20:28

but thats just it snaf, there is no evidence to prove that just by having them in the same room lessens the risk. And are you saying that babies that have to spend time in special care ie not next to parents breathing are less likely to regulate their own breathing and therefore be at more risk? There is no scientific proof. And alot of it is scaremongering. (if thats spelt right?!)

barbamama · 13/12/2007 20:28

i find the breathing monitor really reassuring - we even used it on the snugglenest in bed with us and then on the moses basket next to the bed and now on the cot in their bedroom. I know some people say they make you more paranoid but for us it really helps. I found the first time that without it I was waking and checking so much that I was getting exhausted to the point where I was possibly more likely not to wake up if there was a problem or even drop the baby! Ditto this time at 3/4 months for us - there comes a time where the balance between getting good quality rest so you can look after them well becomes more of an issue and for us, that is the point when they go in their own rooms. Even with the monitors we still check on them several times before we go to bed and whenever we wake up in the night for the loo etc and we bring them in for an hour or two in the mornings when they wake up so we still feel close to them.

You have to wait and see what feels right for you as a family I think but I personally wouldn't ignore the research when it comes to a newborn - they are much more vulnerable imo than even 3/4 month olds who have established themeselves, built up fat reserves, some temperature regulation ability etc etc. not saying SIDS won't happen of course but I think the risk is greatest for newborns and first few weeks isn't it as long as no other factors like smoking?

DoesntChristmasDragOn · 13/12/2007 20:32

SIDS risks aside, why on earth would you (or anyone!) want to walk further than you have to every 3 hours or so in the night?? It's tough enough reaching over to grab them from a basket.

barbamama · 13/12/2007 20:34

Agreed - silly not to have them in your room whilst they are still feeding in the night.

Snaf · 13/12/2007 20:37

So...you'll only take notice of something if it offers cast-iron proof that it works in every scenario, dmt? That is your prerogative, of course, but it seems a little, umm, restrictive.

And yes, babies in special care often have enormous trouble regulating their breathing! I'm not suggesting that that is purely because they're not sleeping next to their mothers - it's for a lot of reasons individual to each baby. But there is evidence (again, you may choose to ignore it, of course) that kangaroo care is good for pre-term or ill babies because it helps their breathing patterns.

No-one is trying to make anyone feel bad. Please don't try to suggest that. The OP asked a question and she got answers, based on current research and evidence. That's all.

DoesntChristmasDragOn · 13/12/2007 20:37

Nothing can prevent SIDS and none of the research claims that following the advice will do this. It claims to lower the risk

Just like wearing a seatbelt lowers your risk of dying in a car accident. It won't prevent it, people who wear seatbelts still die in car accidents, but it lowers the risk.

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