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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Cats and new baby - looking for success stories [title edit by MNHQ]

26 replies

Fagin99 · 16/10/2021 11:27

I'm 16 wks pregnant with my first baby and my beloved cat died two months ago. I was distraught as I'm the kind of the person who needs a cat in their life; they make such a positive difference to my wellbeing.

I mentioned to my mum that I was thinking of getting another cat and she freaked out and said it would sleep in the cot and suffocate the baby (she's from that era and not an 'animal person' so doesn't get my love for cats).

Whilst I know she's being somewhat OTT, it's made me worried and sad at the idea of not having a cat. Obviously the baby's welfare is my top priority, but I'd like to hear from anyone who has successfully had a cat and a baby. What precautions did you take to make it work?

Thank you in advance x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

LastToBePicked · 16/10/2021 11:41

My old cat was completely unfazed by the arrival of a baby and was an absolute softie, I never had the slightest concern around the baby. She actually loved babies, her favourite thing was when we had the NCT group to visit.

It was slightly more of an issue when the baby became a toddler and the cat was very soft anf stupid and with let him poke her eyes and pull her tail rather than just move to a safe distance. I was only every worried about the cat’s welfare!

She was a bit of a special cat though. Our current cat is more of a standard mog who (though generally lovely) will scratch if provoked so I am glad we only got her when our children were slightly older.

Nat4392 · 16/10/2021 11:45

We have a cat and a new baby (I say new, she’s 4 month now!). My mum also blabbed on about the cat sitting on the baby and suffocating her, I think it’s just a warning from their era.
Our cat has taken well to the baby. In usual cat style, he sleeps in everything that is designed for the baby- cot, pram, Moses basket, everything. Our cat isn’t a massive fiddler unless it’s on his terms so honestly I e never been concerned about him sitting on her. He’s even been in her cot the same time as her on occasion- we have a video monitor to watch just in case.
This all being said, this is our family cat of several years, a new cat may react differently. It may actually be better getting a new one after baby is born so it doesn’t know any different.

slothbyday · 16/10/2021 11:49

We've always had cats and the kids came after them.

The baby arrived and the cats adjusted quickly. Did some random things and were fine.

One cat would sleep in the cot during the day and leave once baby was in. I would keep blankets over it during the day to protect the cot, We used the cat cover on the cot initially and she unhooked it, climbed in and pulled it back over her so we figured that wasn't much use!

She swiped/scratched them when they went too far, we supervised the kids and taught them how to behave around the cats.

Once went out for a walk and the cat jumped out from the under storages of the pushchair half way round, she would fully utilise all blankets:warm items the kids had for her benefit but knew they would wriggle and be noisy so rarely actually went near them.

My only worry getting one now is they would be just settled and then unsettled again with baby and might be better to just hang in till after baby is born

RosesAndHellebores · 16/10/2021 11:52

Hmm. I sympathise about the loss of your cat. However when ds was born our (my) very shy timid cat was 10 and took badly to the change becoming more and more timid. At 4 months the baby developed bronchiolitis which hung around forever with constant coughing and wheezing and hospital admissions with three courses of oral steroid before he was one. We had no real idea whether a cat allergy was an underlying cause. I went as far as getting a quote for an outdoor, sheltered and heated run for the cat when the vet called to say an elderly lady had had her elderly torte put to sleep, equally nervous as mine, and for obvious reasons wanted xn elderly cat.

It was a difficult time eased by the money for an outdoor home for the cat and an excellent vet.

I'd be minded op to see how things go with the baby first, have a think about whether the cat's food can be put behind a gate, etc.

LakeShoreD · 16/10/2021 11:53

Our paediatrician when we lived in the US said the cat smothering the baby in the cot thing is a total myth and as far as she was aware it had never actually happened, ever. I still don’t think it’s massively hygienic to have a cat in the cot though so I’d either keep the cat out of your room or get a mosquito net. Neither of my cats have shown much interest in either of the kids though!

Eumy · 16/10/2021 13:27

I have a cat who I adore, and I was a bit worried about this too.
I asked my vet friend about it, and she said it was an urban legend. Most cats will avoid the baby as it’s loud and wriggly. Only thing she said to watch out for is if you cat currently likes to sleep on your face/near you head - as it means they might try and do the same with baby (assuming they aren’t put off by the noise).

sienna14 · 16/10/2021 16:43

We’ve got two cats, who are extremely needy and require a lot of attention. When our daughter arrived they stayed out of the way, now that she’s 17 months one of the cats will approach her and let her stroke her (she’s a very shy and scary cat, always runs upstairs if someone comes to the house), the other one completely ignores DD and can’t be bothered with her…
I think if you get a kitten it’ll only be little when the baby arrives and that’ll be all it’ll know so it should be fine, you’ll need to keep an eye on them and don’t leave them alone in the same room when the baby is small, but I would think they would grow to be best friends and completely adore each other, DD is obsessed with cats and loves seeing kitties on telly, YouTube, phones… she also runs around the house saying kitty and it’s the sweetest thing ever :)

RobinPenguins · 16/10/2021 16:46

Our cat showed no interest whatsoever in the baby. He tried to get in her cot a few times but never if she was in there.

Heyha · 16/10/2021 16:49

We had/have two cats with a baby and all fine, one liked to try to sleep in anything baby related as long as the baby was as far away as possible so did have to be conscious of that (discouraging, and checking for hair if he'd achieved it when we weren't looking) but neither of them hung around baby or showed any interest in the smelly crying thing. They quite like her now she's a toddler though.

BUT the cats were here first and settled. I don't think I'd want a new cat and a new baby at the same time so if it were me I'd either get one ASAP or more likely hang on til life with baby was settled.

tiggerwhocamefortea · 16/10/2021 16:55

I think the whole cat suffocating baby scare stories is a generational thing as my mother freaked out about it too 😂

I have 4 cats and now 3 children (incl 9 month twins). With oldest child they ignored her largely for at least 4 years. The twins they are more interested in I guess because they are used to noisy smelly little people now 😂

They do get in the cots and other toys for a snooze but not when there is a baby in there

My cats were here first though - I wouldn't bring new cats into the family

3 out of 4 of them I trust around the babies - 1 of them I really don't - just because he has a tendency to swat with claws when he's had enough or when someone in his territory and he can be a stroppy bigger. But he's also the one who deliberately seeks the twins out for fuss and get in the middle of the toys when they are playing

Miliao · 16/10/2021 16:56

We have cats and a young baby. I was more worried about the cats as they’re quite shy! They ignored her at the beginning and only now curious, until she moves/sneezes/cries, then they run off again!

Sheldock · 16/10/2021 16:56

We had 5 cats when DS was born. Not one tried to sleep on him or in his cot. They did like the sheepskin mat he had which eventually became theirs they were intrigued by him initially but really, they just left him alone.

BellaTheDarkOverlord · 16/10/2021 17:01

Sometimes I did find our cat age 4 then in the cot but she was at far end from baby, never went near her. Never had any issues except them sleeping in her pushchair and covering it with hair. DD now 6 and adores cats. Been brought up on how to handle them and when not to. Old boy softie cat is obsessed with DD and will chase her around house until she shares her breakfast milk with him .

Katieandthekids · 16/10/2021 17:02

My cat is a right madam. I love her but she's super unreasonable and a bit mean to us. We were concerned about how she'd be with my twins but she's been so amazing and patients and just leaves when she's had enough of them!

Katieandthekids · 16/10/2021 17:06

We close their door at night (ours when they were in our room) and naps so she's doesn't go in the cots and before they were born we just told her off if she went in- so she never does

Heyha · 16/10/2021 17:43

Actually I think reading the replies here another thing that's shining through is that people know their cats if they're already in the household and can usually predict fairly well how they'll be- the one of ours that liked to spread his hair everywhere is very aloof so I suspected he'd keep his distance. His brother is a softy but also a literal scaredy cat so I knew he would find every noise and move terrifying! Scaredy cat is the one that's friends with DD now she's more predictable and knows how to give gentle fusses. The other one still only graces us with his presence when it suits him, he likes to sit and watch her in the garden but that's about it.

So a new cat with an unknown approach to life might be a bit harder to mix with a new baby.

Harlequin1088 · 16/10/2021 17:48

Oh what a stupid statement your mother has come out with. Of course you can have a cat and a baby in the same house. As long as the baby isn't left unsupervised with the cat and the nursery door is always kept shut, etc then that's absolutely fine.

I'm currently 14 weeks pregnant with my first baby and I have two dogs, four cats and a flock of chickens. I won't be getting rid of any of them when baby arrives.

Brollywasntneededafterall · 16/10/2021 17:50

Our dcat's were never around ds enough to do any damage. Waaay too noisy..

*Ds not the dcats...
They did grow very close once ds was old enough to carry them around!

Original poster

Fagin99 · 17/10/2021 11:22

Thank you all so much for your replies! You're all absolutely right; it seems to be a myth from that generation that has unfortunately been passed down! It's great to hear of your success stories, and has given me much to think about.
Thanks again, I'm definitely less worried now x

OP posts:

AtillatheHun · 17/10/2021 11:26

@Fagin99 - there’s a potential bonus too - my eldest, who did a LOT of hanging around with cats as a baby has never been ill / had a bug / thrown up in her life and I am sure it’s excellent immunity caused by sharing cat germs 🤣

RavenclawsRoar · 17/10/2021 11:39

My cat could not be less interested in the dc. The day we brought ds1 home from hospital she gave us a look of such horror and disdain, then disappeared outside for about 9 hours, that I knew she thoroughly disapproved of what we'd done. She didn't want be close to them as babies- she'd only come in when they were asleep and even now they are 4 and 2 and she never goes near them.

WildBluebell · 17/10/2021 12:55

I was worried about it too, but my cat wasn't interested in the baby.
She did get into the cot a few times, but it happened when the baby wasn't there.

Original poster

Fagin99 · 17/10/2021 13:05

@AtillatheHun that's a good point! I had never thought of that but that's such a beneficial bonus! Thank you.

Ha, I'm loving all your stories about your cats thoroughly disapproving. I think that arrogance is partly why I love them so much!

In an ideal world, I'd love my child/children to grow up surrounded by animals (as long as we had the space!), so a cat seems like a good place to start! x

OP posts:

idril · 17/10/2021 13:05

We'd had our cats about a year when we had our first child. One of my cats was a complete cling on but they were both fine. They were a bit perturbed when he first arrived but when they realised he was no threat to them they relaxed.

I'll never forget the look on their faces though when he started to move! But again, they adapted and my children have always been taught to be very respectful towards them.

I would just choose your cat carefully. Perhaps go for a friendly, confident cat rather than one which might have issues.

tabulahrasa · 17/10/2021 13:05

I’d not get a cat just now though - I think it’s a bit unfair on a cat to introduce it to your house when you know a huge life changing event is about to happen tbh.

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