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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

38 weeks and in shock

27 replies

Struggling217 · 04/09/2021 20:45

Had a horrible experience today. Was having a great day taking my toddler out. He was on his bike and somehow went over his bike then kept rolling down and fell into a river. I have no idea how it happened, it was something out of a nightmare. In a split second before I knew what had happened we were both in the water. I guess I tried to catch him and fell over myself. I got completely submerged in water but my toddler miraculously kept his head out. I then had to push him back up and pull myself up through the brambles. We have a few scratches but otherwise fine but mentally I'm a complete mess. Kept it breezy all evening for the sake of my toddler who seems perfectly fine but now he is in bed I am having a complete meltdown.

So worried about him and the baby. I tried ringing 111 to see if we needed to be checked but I'm in a queue and no one picks up. I'm worried he'll have secondary drowning or be sick from the germs. Or be traumatised for life. Or he'll tell the childminder and they'll think I'm an unfit mother. I'm worried the baby got hurt when I fell or the trauma will affect it, or I'll get an infection from the dirty water that will pass the placenta. Please help, I don't know what to do and feel like the worst mother for failing to keep my babies safe. I wish I would wake up from this nightmare. Should I ring triage?

OP posts:
serialname · 04/09/2021 20:47

Ring them so they can reassure you. Well done for rescuing him.

Sexnotgender · 04/09/2021 20:48

Definitely ring.

BalloonSlayer · 04/09/2021 20:48

You sound like a Superhero Mother, rescuing your baby whilst heavily pregnant.

Stay on the line to 111, as I expect the reassurance will do you good, but I would think you are almost certainly fine. You rock!

sashagabadon · 04/09/2021 20:51

Accidents happen and it Sounds like you reacted brilliantly in the situation. Well done you for keeping your head and saving both you and your son. You should be proud!
I get it’s shocking though and you’ll need to process it.

Row1n · 04/09/2021 20:52

Oh you poor thing that sounds really scary.

Did you land with a thud at all? And have you felt normal movement since?

I would call to get reassurance either way, and maybe keep an eye on ds overnight but if he kept his head up I wouldnt be too worried about secondary drowning

RandomMess · 04/09/2021 20:52

Do you have someone that can come around and be with you? You are understandably in shock.

Thanks
Rainysky · 04/09/2021 20:53

You actually sound like the most amazing mum - what a bloody superhero you were today!! And not only did you rescue him, you managed to hold it all together until after he went to bed!

What a horrid thing to have happened - I'm not surprised you're upset now and running through every possible worse-case scenario. Hold on the line to 111 for some help and support Thanks

User5827372728 · 04/09/2021 20:55

Was the river flowing? If so it would be freshish water so I wouldn’t worry about the water.

Secondary drowning- you said his head was above the water, so he wouldn’t have had a drowning experience.

Babies are well protected inside the womb, so it’s very unlikely you caused damage

You didn’t drink the water so it won’t pass through the cord

Sounds like a horrific ordeal, I’m glad you are all ok, what a shock

Sunshine1235 · 04/09/2021 20:57

There should be an all hours number for your midwife team on your notes somewhere. Can you call them? I phoned them once at 3am when I was vomiting blood and they were so helpful. They will be able to advise you but it sounds like you did an amazing job and I’m sure both your little ones will be fine. Babies are very protected inside you and toddlers ingest far worse things than river water

Crazycatlady83 · 04/09/2021 20:58

You sound like a super hero, definitely the complete opposite of a bad mother! Well done!

Can you phone labour triage and get their advice - I have found they are really good for all aspects of maternity care, not just when you are in labour?

I hope you can mentally feel better soon and everything is well with you all

SarahJinx · 04/09/2021 20:59

I think you should ring the labour ward if you’re worried and speak to a midwife. Well done though, you did what was needed and I’m sure it will all be fine xx

chesterelly · 04/09/2021 21:03

Stay on line & wait for 111. If you don't feel you can or you think there might be something wrong with your baby can you find a number for your maternity unit in your notes and call them. Have you got someone with you? Would a friend or family member come over to keep you company and be able to look after your DS if you need to attend hospital. You sound pretty amazing to me, you acted without thinking to save your son. Your brain's catching up now with the processing of it.

TheWayTheLightFalls · 04/09/2021 21:06

You sound amazing OP. How are baby’s movements since? What happens if you drink a cold Coke or similar and lie down?

Verbena87 · 04/09/2021 21:11

You’ve done an amazing job, honestly.

My toddler fell over paddling in a lake last summer and by the time I got to him (fully clothed, running full tilt) he was fully submerged, flailing about. The scariest thing ever. Dragged him up and he spat/spluttered/puked lake water all over us both, was in his eyes/nose/mouth/ears. Apart from a much healthier attitude to risk assessing water, he was fine afterwards.

I do quite a bit of open water/river swimming too and so far have never picked anything up even when I’ve realised I’ve got a cut/graze, or when water has splashed in my mouth.

I know it does happen, but when you Google it’s easy to feel horrible infections are inevitable and they’re not.

I would speak to 111/your midwife time just for reassurance as you’re understandably in shock from a bloody awful experience.

SisforSarah · 04/09/2021 21:20

Dr here. You’ll all be fine, and neither of you need checking out. Aside from professional experience I’ve been with 2 different mums when their toddlers have fallen into a pond and a canal and been submerged and been fine. One of the mums was heavily pregnant, she was fine so was the baby. If you came to A&E you’d be seen after about 5 hours, told you were fine and sent on your way. I’m sorry it’s been so traumatic for you, but honestly you have nothing to worry about x

Bennetgirl · 04/09/2021 21:29

My daughter nearly drowned in a swimming lesson once. I ran round to the pool and she was out by the time I got to her. I was in shock for a couple of weeks after that. It’s surprising how it can effect you.

Be kind to yourself and talk to people about what happened, it will help.

You did something incredible today that no parent ever wants to see. You should feel really proud as well x

Guineapiggiesmalls · 04/09/2021 21:31

That sounds so scary, no wonder you’re shaken up! Honestly though, you sound like a superhero - saving your toddler and managing to keep it together until he was asleep in bed Flowers

WhyOhWhyOhWhyyyy · 04/09/2021 21:33

Oh my goodness. I think it’s totally normal to feel in shock after that experience, you should also feel very proud of yourself, you did amazingly.
Do what you can to relax and unwind this evening.

CustardGoodJamGoodMeatGood · 04/09/2021 21:46

Nobody is going to think you are a rubbish mum, you jumped in the river at 38 weeks pregnant to save your child! You're a badass mum who would clearly do anything for her babies. I'm sure theres hardly any risk to the baby, they're well protected but do you have a maternity triage line you can ring? I'm sure they'll be happy to check you over if you're worried. Thank goodness your both OK x

Struggling217 · 04/09/2021 21:49

Thank you for being so kind it is helping me process things. I will call triage and 111 so I know I have covered all bases and will sleep next to DS to make sure he is OK.

The river was flowing, it is used for kayaking a lot and wild water swimming nearby so hoping it isn't too nasty. I don't think I swallowed any but to be honest I don't really remember, it went so fast. As for DS he definitely had his head above water the whole time I could see him but there was perhaps 5 or 10 seconds where I was under myself and couldn't see him. He didn't cough or anything though and I don't remember his face or hair being wet when we came out either. I think he just slid and was slowed down by the brambles whereas I just fell straight in head first.

No thud and didn't hit my belly but everything kind of aches now from trying to push him up and pull myself up.

I just can't stop crying thinking about what could have happened. It could have been so, so bad. I just feel like a terrible mother for letting this happen in the first place. We should have used a different path altogether. You just never think these things would happen to you, it's going to change my outlook forever.

DH is here and being supportive. DS is amazing, he was upset that he lost his shoe but was really chirpy and happy all evening, ate all his dinner, went on his bike again after dinner for a walk and went to sleep fine. I really hope everything will be OK.

OP posts:
GoWalkabout · 04/09/2021 22:09

Well done what an amazing mum you are, you didn't hesitate you rescued your son and one day you'll all talk about this together and your children will be so proud of you.
For the trauma - do exactly what you are doing and work on processing it. Think about what happened when, don't worry about gaps just think 'i must have... Then i remember... Then this happened' and make sure every time you tell the story you go right to the end bit where you were both safe and warm. Tell your midwife and follow any advice but remember - even if you or your son get an infection or something else happens that you have to deal with, you avoided the most immediate and life threatening situation and saved your sons life. You wouldn't want to do it any other way.

Struggling217 · 04/09/2021 22:11

Forgot to answer about baby's movements. They have been perfectly normal. Luckily this baby is very active so it never leaves me guessing for too long before I get kicked again!

Thank you all who shared your experiences too. Sorry similar horrible things happened to you but I'm so glad everything was fine and it is helping me rationalise things a bit. Hopefully we will be OK too.

@sisforsarah good to hear from a doctor thank you that is reassuring. did your pregnant friend also get submerged in water? I think my main worry now is infection to the baby in case I swallowed some water and also through the many grazes I got from the brambles. I read about diseases from rats being really dangerous to the foetus. I spent pregnancy triple washing every bit of fruit and vegetable and then I swallow rat water. I'm so scared. :(

DDefinitely don't think we nneed A&E, just wanted to get medical advice to make sure I have thought of everything and know what to look out for.

OP posts:
Hardchoices · 04/09/2021 22:21

You and your baby are seperate so if you swallowed water the worst it would give you is the runs I would think especially as it is flowing water and not stagnant.

Be kind to yourself. You’ve had a bloody terrible day.

DancyNancy · 04/09/2021 22:42

Oh you poor thing. That is an awful thing to happen.you are bound to be upset for while after this. Panic moments like that.... your brain only starts to process it later. Allow the time to cry and release. Remind yourself you are both safe and well now. Awful shock, be very gentle with yourself. Your boy might talk about it in days to come. He will process it too. You can just listen and reaffirm what happened so he can process it too. Reminding him he is safe xx hugs

User0ne · 04/09/2021 22:53

It sounds like you're a bit shocked and suffering end of pregnancy hormones (I've had 3 and don't mean it dismissively).

From what you've said neither of you are hurt and there's nothing to suggest the baby is hurt. You haven't become ill since being in the water.

So, have a bit hot chocolate and a warm bath. Watch a year jerker film to get some of the hormone catastrophic emotions out.

You did all the right things. Accidents happen and it sounds like you handled it admirably.