Start mat leave at 36 or 37 weeks?

[AngelaChasesBestLife]

I am 28 weeks pregnant with my first baby. Saw the midwife yesterday who advised me that due to my age (40) I'm likely to be induced at 40 weeks. This has scared me as I wasn't really expecting that.

She asked me when I was planning to go off on mat leave and I said 38 weeks (am still agreeing with my employer the dates and have some leave I can use before, and carry over to next year.) She seemed quite shocked at this and said I should really be going at 36 weeks. I could go then, or at 37.

Does anyone have any advice as to what they did about finishing at work or any regrets? I have a very stressful job with a lot of responsibility so probably for my sanity should go sooner as the pressure is unlikely to alleviate any time soon. Not commuting to London any more as we are all still wfh so at least don't have that stress so that had made me think I could go on for longer.

Also despite being desperate to be a Mum for so long have found pregnancy really hard and don't feel like I've enjoyed it as much as I should have done, but worried I'll go off and then be unable to switch off from work. Feel like I don't actually know how to make the most of it!! Help talk some sense into me wise women!!

I’m 28 and finished at 37 weeks, even though I was WFH it was the right time for me to finish because I feel like my body is starting to slow down a little and is feeling a bit more pressure with the baby. I’m sure it’s entirely up to you as you know your own body and mind best x

I was in the hospital with my youngest at 37 weeks and had him at 38. So I always recommend going earlier!

I finished at 36 weeks with my first and 34 weeks with my second.

Do you want any baby free time before hand to rest and do any last minute bits? You could work till 36/37 weeks and then have baby before you finish work. Or you may find the closer you get to 34 weeks you are on your knees with no sleep and going loo every 5min and just need few days at home.

You're within your rights to go at 38 weeks or at anytime before due date. If you want to and can work until 38 weeks then don't be pressured to go off earlier. It's your choice.

I went off at 36 weeks with both pregnancies. Writing really good handover docs and sitting with cover to discuss upcoming work and plans for the year helped me to switch off from work, though it's always at the back of my mind! Make some lovely plans for you if you decide to go at 36/37 weeks, lunch out, shopping, box sets you've always wanted to binge, etc. Just generally enjoy the last few weeks of peace and quiet! I planned to work until 37 weeks this pregnancy but ended up feeling awful and finishing at 36 weeks. I am 37 for context and this is my second pregnancy.

How are you feeling? I was a little bit younger but fit as a flea and had a very uneventful pregnancy and wasn’t stressed or having any health issues.

I was supposed to go off on maternity two weeks before my due date but DS decided to arrive 16 days before his due date (so I’d been at work all day and he made an appearance that night).

I went off on mat leave at almost 35 weeks. Currently in week one of my mat leave. I too have quite a stressful job, on constant conference calls and was starting to feel really tired. Imo the more time off you have the better. This week I've been none stop sorting stuff out in the house to get things ready - cleaning, washing all the baby clothes, getting the rooms ready, clearing my work desk and batch cooking. It's been great to have some time to get all these tasks done and I'm also looking forward to a few weeks of relaxing before baby comes.

I worked until 38 weeks with my first and regretted it a bit because he came at 39+1, so I didn't feel I'd had much of a chance to relax. So I finished at 36 weeks with DC2 and he didn't show up until 40+1 and I felt that I'd stopped too early as it felt like I was hanging around forever waiting - typical! It really depends on the job, your pregnancy and how much leave you're planning to take overall (I knew I could only have 6 months the first time so didn't want to 'waste' any more than necessary before the baby came), but I don't think planning to finish at 38 weeks while WFH is inherently crazy.

36 weeks feels far too early to me. The last few weeks drag by and sitting about at home would make them seem even slower.

I finished at 39 weeks with my first and was induced at 39+6.

Second I finished at 38 weeks and had a planned C-section at 39 weeks.

This one I am finishing at 37.5 weeks and having a planned C-section at 39 weeks.

Don't get me wrong, working in the last few weeks is very hard going but I used annual leave and flexible working to cut down my hours a bit so it was more of a tapered finish.

Don't worry about finishing up and thinking about work. I found it really hard to finish and hand over, but the moment mat leave started I was able to switch to baby mode and once the baby arrives, it's like work never existed!

I finished at just shy of 38 weeks last time (because I had an ELCS booked at 38+6) and this time I'm off at 38+2. I personally get very little benefit from sitting around at home waiting unable to do much, but then I had a fairly simple pregnancy in the third trimester (made up for being bed ridden in the first trimester). Like you I have a stressful but desk job, and this time am WFH so no commute. It depends if you have any grand plans to fulfill before you go off on Mat Leave? I found the stresses of work easier to ignore when I actually had the baby and felt i could legitimately tell people to go away as I was recovering/had a baby to care for.

I went at 37 weeks (after starting a MN thread for advice) and ended up going into labour at 38 weeks. I was also suppsoed to be induced at 39 weeks, but had high blood pressure and premature rupture of membranes. I had so many plans for those last few weeks that obviously never happened. Although i was also working from home so no commuting into central london, i found my mind was elsewhere in those last few weeks and i have quite q stressful job so it took me a while to wind down. So i would really advocate for earlier rather than later, especially with a first!

So many typos in that message 🙈 Still haven't mastered mnetting one handed whilst breastfeeding!

I finished work at 36 weeks with my first baby and it was bliss! He arrived at 39 weeks, so I had three weeks to wash everything, get the nursery ready, but most importantly to relax. I walked every day, read a pile of books and just enjoyed resting up and preparing myself for what I knew would be several months of sleeplessness. If you have a stressful job I would definitely be taking your midwife's advice and going at 36 weeks. You don't know when your baby will arrive - s/he could come before 40 weeks, like mine did.

You don't need to be induced because of your age, they love to push induction but do your own research and be informed. Maybe have a look at some resources from midwife Sarah Wickham.
I went off 38 weeks with my first and it was way too early but my baby was 42 weeks and I was bored senseless after about a week of mat leave.

I was also 40 with my son 2 years ago and I have no idea what it would have been like as a younger mum to be but I was knackered and ready to go, and I was a fit and healthy 40 yo. I took a week off as a buffer to make sure my work was all handed over, back in to clear stuff down, then went at 36 weeks. Worked for me. Too early and you have less mat leave with the baby, too late and you'll be too tired and fed up to relax before baby arrives.

With my first, I worked til 37+2 and used annual leave to start maternity leave at due date. I had a full on job with an hour commute each way. I also raised eyebrows with the midwife but it was completely the right decision for me. I had a very well pregnancy and DS didn't arrive until 40+6 so I had a nice break.

This time I'm planning to go at 36+2 again using annual leave til due date. The main reason for the extra week is that I'm part time now so have way less time to myself. I also have enough leave to do it.

You know your body. You can always go sooner if you're struggling.

Oooo thanks for starting this OP. It’s been good for me to read through other people’s dates as I was worried I was taking too long before the birth. I’m starting a month of annual leave on Monday and then starting maternity at 36 weeks. I’m exhausted and feel sick a lot so I just need the time!

I'm 32 and expecting my first baby. I finished work last Friday when I was 37+4 I felt it was the right time for me possibly a little late, I have a desk job and working from home since March 2020 but it was becoming a struggle to stay motivated and stay alert and engaged on Teams calls all day. I was getting uncomfortable. I think the reason I didn't go off earlier is for the 4 weeks before finishing I took an annual leave day or two each week to have shorter weeks running up to finishing and it definitely helped and would recommend if it's viable for anyone. It helped me wind down slowly rather then going from all to nothing.

With hindsight I'd say go as soon as you can and never look back! But that's a bit extreme, so in the real world, use as much annual leave as you can before the birth, so your maternity leave starts on the due date so you can have the full 12 months at home (then , if your employer allows it, tack any accrued a/l on the end of mat leave so you can extend it even further.

Can you tell I wasn't keen to go back to work 😂

I worked to 38.5 weeks with my first, I am a teacher but had been put on desk duties a few weeks before (I had other skillz that were particularly useful at the time of year and my exam classes were all done and dusted so it made sense) so I wasn't working 'hard' as it were. I was induced on my due date for medical reasons. I think I'd have been bored and restless if I'd finished any earlier tbh, having a week and half felt about right although with it being my first time I'd assumed I'd go overdue and get a full couple of weeks in! But I think the days would have dragged if I'd gone much earlier, I'd done most of my baby to do list. The only thing I didn't do was the big nesting clean they say about but that's only because I was induced rather than my body deciding it was time to go naturally, I think.

For me 36 weeks would have been way too early to start mat leave as DD didn't make an arrival until 42+2.

However, as all of my holidays were cancelled due to covid I had all of my annual leave entitlement to take - so ended up going on annual leave at 36 weeks & then mat leave started on due date, so 40 weeks. Could you do something similar?

I would start mat leave as late as you feel you can manage so that you have more time with baby and more of your time off once they arrive is actually paid!

I worked up to my due date and was scheduled for an induction the day after. I didn’t want to think about the process so wanted the distraction and to maximise my time off afterwards. I felt fine though and was doing my 15000 steps to try and avoid induction (didn’t work! 😂)

Unless you are being told you have to be formally signed off, it is your choice when you finish. I preferred to work closer to due date and take time at the other end. That would have changed if I felt physically unable.

I'm taking my leave at 37w6d which is next Friday. I'm a FTM, had an easy pregnancy so far but definitely feeling it now.

I'm working from home and lucky that my boss has basically said if my hand over is done (which it is) I can take my foot off the pedal and relax a little, just being available to my cover. If I needed to be working at my usual pace I would be struggling. In reality I should probably just finish tomorrow but I want the extra week's mat leave when baby arrives. My last week isn't going to be too tough thankfully.

Unless you have a medical reason to finish earlier it totally up to you.

I went at 36 weeks but used annual leave so my mat leave didn't start until the day after the baby was born. Good job I went early as dd turned up 10 days early. If I had gone at 38 weeks I would have only had 3 days before she turned up.