Start mat leave at 36 or 37 weeks?

[AngelaChasesBestLife]

I am 28 weeks pregnant with my first baby. Saw the midwife yesterday who advised me that due to my age (40) I'm likely to be induced at 40 weeks. This has scared me as I wasn't really expecting that.

She asked me when I was planning to go off on mat leave and I said 38 weeks (am still agreeing with my employer the dates and have some leave I can use before, and carry over to next year.) She seemed quite shocked at this and said I should really be going at 36 weeks. I could go then, or at 37.

Does anyone have any advice as to what they did about finishing at work or any regrets? I have a very stressful job with a lot of responsibility so probably for my sanity should go sooner as the pressure is unlikely to alleviate any time soon. Not commuting to London any more as we are all still wfh so at least don't have that stress so that had made me think I could go on for longer.

Also despite being desperate to be a Mum for so long have found pregnancy really hard and don't feel like I've enjoyed it as much as I should have done, but worried I'll go off and then be unable to switch off from work. Feel like I don't actually know how to make the most of it!! Help talk some sense into me wise women!!

I’m finishing at 35weeks but taking 2 weeks annual leave so my maternity leave kicks in at 37 weeks. Is there any way you could tag on some annual leave? I would finish before 37 weeks as you need time to rest and you never know, baby may come early!

I went at 38wks with my eldest when I was 21, she was 2wks late so regretted it because in those days you only got 4m.

I had DC4 at 40, my trust doesn't induce 40+ mothers until 41wks and I was just turned 40. He was induced at 40wks due to size, had he been average they were going to let me go to 42wks.

I went on mat leave with him at about 36wks for a few reasons, I worked in a school so was on my feet all day, and often asked to cover classes last minute. It was also very very hot and also I wanted a few weeks peace before baby arrived while my others were still in school as he was due in the holidays, term finished when I was 39wks and I really couldn't last until then.

Had dc5 at 41 and induced at 41wks on the dot due to age. I wasn't working then though.

I think working to 38wks is totally possible depending on your job, how you feel, what sort of commute etc.

I'm 33 and expecting my first baby. Have been WFH for past few months as frontline NHS worker but in the end brought my mat leave start date forward to 35 weeks (using a mixture of annual leave then official mat leave at 37 weeks).

A few factors influenced my decision.. likelihood of having c-section at 39 weeks, increasing discomfort and pelvic pain from SPD and also just wanting to chill out and really have some time to myself before baby arrives. As my Mum kept pointing out...you will never have this time on your own again!

Some people may think it's too much time off beforehand but guess it boils down to what suits you as an individual and your lifestyle. I've arranged one small outing pretty much everyday (meeting friends for coffee, having lunch with family etc) then spending time cleaning/doing baby prep and relaxing around that. Find I fill my time well and am really enjoying the mental and physical break. If you think you'd get bored at home then maybe aim for 37/38 weeks but of like me you can fill your time well then 36 weeks is good.

I would say don't underestimate how 'pregnant you will likely feel by 36 weeks..it suddenly all catches up with you!

I’m older than you and went off at 37 weeks with my second, 36 with my first. I have quite a physical job though so I started to need frequent rests and would have struggled to go on much longer as my bump was aching by the end of the shift. I don’t see why you couldn’t wfh until 38 weeks if you felt well enough. Completely your choice though

I finished work on my due date but sounds like my job is less stressful than yours. If I'd had to commute or had a more physical job I would definitely have finished earlier. As 37 weeks is term, and the baby could have turned up anytime from then, I handed over all ongoing projects in the run up to 37 weeks so my workload was very low and manageable towards the end, but was handy still being there to answer questions from colleagues who were taking on my projects.

My partner and I got stuff ready for the baby together during the third trimester, but neither of us were too fussed about having stuff perfect before D-day. Anything we hadn't done/bought beforehand was easily got once the baby turned up.

I went a week overdue and got to have a final solo trip to the cinema which I'm really glad I had time to do. Also lounged around and read books/watched lots of tele.

My colleague went off at 36 weeks and got really bored. I love doing nothing and would have happily gone off work earlier without missing it but didn't want to eat into my maternity leave before the baby turned up, and now I'm grateful I've got that extra time that I can spend with her.

It's so irritating not knowing when they'll turn up. I gambled that I'd go overdue, as most FTM do, and I'm glad I did as I got a week to myself to relax (as much as you can relax when massive and massively uncomfortable) before the craziness, but I was aware this might not happen if the baby turned up on time or early and if I hadn't been ok with that and was dead set on time to myself then I'd have gone off earlier.

One argument for being off work earlier is to make sure you're well rested but I went into labour at 1am so no amount of time off beforehand would have meant I started motherhood with any energy reserves and I found late pregnancy too uncomfortable to get good quality sleep in anyway.

Good luck with deciding!

I'm 37 and went off on 39 +5... which turned out to be the day he was born. A couple of days of mat leave would have been nice, but I am so glad I didnt go much earlier. Whilst my job is intense, I could wfh and would rather have the time with my gorgeous DS at age 1. I used weekends to sort stuff out around the house (I was working long hours during the week).

I finished at 36 weeks but had a couple of weeks annual leave and maternity started at 38 weeks. Ironically I had both my DC at 38 weeks plus a couple of days.
It's hard as everyone is different and you don't know when you will actually have your baby. Personally I wouldn't work past 37 weeks as you are classed as full term and should expect to go into labour at any time. Although with you wfh I suppose it wouldn't be that dramatic

Following with interest as I'm having my first baby aged 41.

No one has mentioned anything to me about being induced at 40 weeks so far.

I am due on 27/1/22 and currently have asked to start maternity leave on 17/1 but take 2 weeks annual leave beforehand so effectively finish working (from home) at the end of December.

It sounds mad but I'm doing a Masters degree and am hoping to get some of my dissertation written in those first 2 weeks of annual leave!

I would go at 36 weeks. I started mat leave at 37+6 and went into labour the next day! I wish I’d had more time before

I worked til 36 weeks with both my pregnancies, I'm a nurse and work on a busy ward doing 12 hour shifts though and it was getting physically hard to manage around then. However both mine went over due date and it felt like a long time waiting around!

If your job is less physical I'd keep on until 37 weeks. You will appreciate the time off more after baby is born.

I attempted to work up to 38 weeks in my first pregnancy a few years ago (when I was 32) but found by 37 weeks I was just so tired and fed up so ended up bringing it forward a week. This time I’ve planned to finish at 36.5 weeks, I’m currently 34 weeks and already ready to go. I just find that my energy and motivation levels nosedive towards the end. It’s also really nice to factor in a few weeks before your due date to rest, batch cook, get the house sorted, etc.

Hi everyone thanks you so much for everyone's experiences and wise advice. It's been really useful and much appreciated. Lots of thinking for me to do I think! xx