Nobody will help 😔

[Ter2021]

Hey,
So I’m 11.2weeks. On Wednesday night I started bleeding and getting cramps. Thursday i went to A&E and was taken to the early pregnancy unit- 6hours later I was examined by a dr they noticed I had a water infection, he examined me and found my cervix was closed, he gave me antibiotics and sent me home with a referral for a scan on Monday.
I’m still cramping and bleeding- phoned drs, midwifes, hospitals and nobody will help. I feel like I’m just being left to miscarry 😔 I feel so let down. I’m scared to pee because I know I will see blood when I wipe. I’m trying to be positive but I’m struggling. I don’t know what else I can do.

I'm so sorry. Early pregnancy is awful because unfortunately there is nothing they can do (except provide emotional support).

Find your village around you, surround yourself with people who love you and can provide you with some comfort whilst your body works out what is happening. 50% of bleeding in pregnancy does not result in miscarriage so it may not all be over.

I didn't want to read and run

As I understand it, there is very little anyone could do if you were miscarrying

I know its very difficult as I have been there and you should be treated with empathy and compassion but practically I can understand why you maybe haven't been seen yet as even if a scan shows an issue there isn't anything they would do at this stage.

Sending love and hope you manage to get some rest and all turns out well for you

Unfortunately there is not much else they can do and only thing would have been to book a scan. If in pain take some paracetamol, I am sorry you feel alone though, is your DP with you

The blood could be from the water infection, you are not definitely miscarrying. Try to relax and give the antibiotics time to kick in.

Sorry to hear this but as someone who had a miscarriage at 10 weeks unfortunately there is nothing they can do to help if that's what's happening. I just went home and got through it myself, they couldn't do anything for me even if I wanted them to.

Try to be positive. Miscarriages are non-viable babies who would have severe disabilities if they were able to continue developing to full term. Personally I'd much rather have a(nother) miscarriage than a severely disabled child.

If you have a uti you must not hold your urine! That could make things much worse!

Unfortunately, there's very little the drs can do if you are miscarrying, however it may be blood from the infection. You need to get that cleared up otherwise you could get worse.

Thank you for your kind words guys,
It’s hard because they tell you, if you experience bleeding seek medical advice urgently and I’ve been trying.
The waiting really is the worst. x

It's so unfortunate but there isn't anything medical professionals can do for you if you are miscarrying. It is better to be at home. It's scary, but it's extremely common, I think we realise this now how common it is. I'm very sorry you're going through this but the EPU see this day in day out so they are kind of immune to it now sadly. If you're still bleeding tomorrow (and in pain) and they haven't scanned you or offered to I would call them explain what's happening (as it'll probably be different staff) and say you're concerned it could be ectopic because you're in quite a lot of pain or something and they should scan you just so you can get closure that you are miscarrying and it's not bleeding from something else ie cervical ectropion etc

Oops sorry just saw they've offered you a scan for Monday. It must feel like forever away. If you want one immediately I would book a private scan, somewhere near you will do these. The ultrasound department for pregnant ladies are only open Monday-Friday so they've got you in as soon as they can. It's just a waiting game. Please update when you know what's happening! Be thinking of you

Thank you x

You already did seek medical advice for the bleeding though, it's been dealt with by them, so either it's because of the uti and might stop with the antibiotics or it might not, they've given you the help they can, sorry x

Try to holding to hope until a mc is confirmed, good luck.
I had the same problem when I mc'd in July. I got a scan for 4 days after asking for help from GP but passed baby 2 days before my scan. It's really crappy but if it's happening there is nothing they can do to stop it in early pregnancy. I'm over 32wk with another now so it's not all doom and gloom.

Fingers crossed that things are ok for you xx

I hope everything goes well on Monday and I know it’s easier said than done but the worrying won’t change anything. Just try and be kind to your body and it doesn’t mean you’re miscarrying and I hope it’s a positive outcome tomorrow x

I had similar to you bit I was further along around 20 weeks. I woke up from a nap and there was a sudden gush, I ran to the toilet and it was blood. Like you I went to hospital and was examined had swabs taken and heartbeat was monitored. It turned out I had thrush even though I had no symptoms. I hope this gives you some hope x x

Unfortunately not good news for me. No heartbeat 😔😢

So sorry.

Take care of yourself.

I'm so sorry for your loss Ter.

The Miscarriage Association website has lots of information on that might help, they also have a helpline and I think a forum where you can speak to others in the same situation.

The best advice I was given, regarding my feelings and grief, recovery takes as long as it takes. Don't feel life has to go back to normal straightaway, take the time you need to process your loss.

Thank you for your kind words. I will take a look at the website, I just have no idea what to expect now or how long the cramps and bleeding will last x

Am so so sorry Ter. This happened to me just last month, I was the same as you, angry, distraught and frustrated that all the advice is 'seek help if you are bleeding' and the indifference from the staff felt horrific. I've stopped bleeding now after just over 3 weeks, so l will say make sure you have pads with you. Sending you love and an unmumsnetty hug and shoulder to cry on.

Thank Michelle. I’m sorry for your loss too. 😔😢
I’m just trying to figure out what route I go down, I’ve been given a natural, medical or surgical option.

@Ter2021 I’m so sorry for your loss and what you’re going through x

@Ter2021 I'm so sorry for your loss. Early pregnancy support is terrible. I was utterly shocked that when I started bleeding, I couldn't even see a Dr face to face. I was just left at home to suffer... unfortunately mine ended in complications, so I was left trying to process feeling let down by the health service, along with my loss. It's truly rubbish.
I understand that if you are miscarrying, there is nothing to be done... but they also have a duty of care to check you are miscarrying and not suffering an ectopic rupture of other life threatening condition like I was! :-(
I hope you aren't in too much pain - and shout if you want to talk, it sucks xx