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Original poster

SCAN AT 14 WEEKS, Can they tell the SEX OF THE BABY ???

85 replies

sweetbean · 20/11/2007 11:53

Having my first scan on Friday and will be 14 weeks exactly, so just wondered if there was any chance that they might be able to tell what sex the baby was even if there no 100% certain ?

Thanks for any replies x

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Sweetiesandcakes · 20/11/2007 13:23

Hi sweetbean. I found out the sex of my DD 12 weeks. The sonographer told me that although its not easy to tell at this stage, my scan was clear and that she was certain I was having a girl. She said to test her and see if she was right when i came back at 5 months. Well, guess what..................she was right.

NorthernLurker · 20/11/2007 16:11

To be honest I think there is a lot to be said for a policy of never telling parents the sex. This idea that you can find out what you're having encourages parents to see the scan as a benign activity, a little window into your baby's world, a chance to say hello. Well if you are lucky then yes that is what it is - but the purpose of scans are to establish the stage of pregnancy and identify any issues that there may be with the baby. I think you should agree to have scans because you want/need the answers to these questions rather than subjecting yourself to what is after all a medical investigation willy-nilly (appropriate to the thread I thought )
I too have a friend who is a sonographer - the worst thing in her job is telling someone something may be wrong - what makes it worse - the presence of the other children the parents bought along to 'say hello' That's not to say you should never take other children to a scan, nor enjoy the experience - BUT I think we should think a lot more about why we're having the scan(s) and how much we are prepared/want to know.

lemonaid · 20/11/2007 16:39

We haven't taken DS to either of our scans for exactly that reason -- it's a medical thing not a social occasion, and if something were wrong DS's presence would immeasurably complicate things. Now that all seems well we may book a private scan for the New Year where he can "see the baby". It was nice that the sonographer was happy to have a quick look as she was going past the relevant area and give us a girl/boy opinion, though. If she couldn't have seen then it wouldn't have been the end of the world, but as someone who likes to know in advance it was a pleasant added extra.

SHEENA1 · 20/11/2007 16:47

they wont tell you till you are 30 weeks even at that some hospitals in england refuse to tell you at all the same in some parts of where i am in scotland

Original poster
sweetbean · 21/11/2007 10:10

Can i just say Thank you to everyone who responded to this tread!!!

But what the hell is the matter with the few of you who have to come on and preach at me !!!!!!!! how dare you be so patronising as to think that all i care about is what colour to paint the nursery or what cloths to pre buy !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wish you would all just mind your own bloody business !! i see it all the time on MN people who just can't resist saying how ungrateful we are being for even daring to be interested in the sex of are babies well I'm sorry but you can all go and jump !!!

The health of my unborn child is obviously the most important thing in the world to any mother and to suggest that by interested in the sex of your child changes that in any way is totally out of order an makes you a very narrow mind and stupid individuals!!!

I already have a daughter was am well are how luck i am to have her!! so please in future pull your head in and shut up, you don't know me or anything about my life!

Thanks for all other posts and am still hoping for a sneeky glims to what i might be having!! xx

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goingfor3 · 21/11/2007 10:15

The gentitatls don't often form until after 15 weeks so it's unlikely you will be able to tell at 14 weeks. I mc'd at 16 weeks and even when the baby was born the dr said he was probably a boy but couldn't say 100%, a pm confirmed he was a boy.

Sweetiesandcakes · 21/11/2007 14:19

Well said sweetbean - you tell em!

Good luck for Friday - heres hoping that they can tell you the sex. How exciting!!!! If you feel like sharing - then please let us know what they say and then we can start talking about names!!!

FioFio · 21/11/2007 14:24

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FioFio · 21/11/2007 14:25

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Sweetiesandcakes · 21/11/2007 14:28

FioFio - that was a bit personal and below the belt.

Sweetbean - are you ok?

lulumama · 21/11/2007 14:31

bloody hell sweetbean ! i think you have really overreacted

no-one was preaching, they were giving their own opinions, the comments were talking about women, not you, who only care about painting the nursery the right colour.

i think fio has very relevant reasons for posting what she did, she is entitled to state her opinion, as are you, but your anger is misdirected. she was not talking about you!

fwiw, i found out the gender for both my DCs, i would not think more or less of anyone who didn't.

FioFio · 21/11/2007 14:34

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FioFio · 21/11/2007 14:34

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Sweetiesandcakes · 21/11/2007 14:36

No backlash form me FioFio. Am TTC and have made it my policy not to get stressed - heehee!

Original poster
sweetbean · 21/11/2007 15:22

FioFio

I think ive made my point! and your comment
only lets everyone else know that my opinion of you is more than likely right!!

Oh and bravo on the excellent use of the English language to express yourself! I'm so glad we can have adult discussions on MN and not lower Ourselves to nasty childish name calling!!!!!!!!!

Sweetieandcakes

Thanks for the concern I'm fine xxxxxxx

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FioFio · 21/11/2007 18:34

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lulumama · 21/11/2007 19:14

i don't particularly want to get involved, but i think you are being really unfair on fio

you called her 'stupid' and 'narrow minded' and told her to 'shut up', so i think it is a little unfair to be sarcastic about posters being childish ...

as i said, fio was not patronising you it was a general observation and her own opinion.

i don;t think your opinion of fio is right at all. anyhoo, i usually say 'sort this sort of thing out off board', so i shall leave this now, but i wanted to stick up for fio.

LadyOfWaffle · 21/11/2007 19:24

Skipping all the other stuff, I doubt they can tell and I doubt they will tell you. Obviously some can take a guess at what they think it is but as you probably know it's not going to be 100%. I was told at 20 weeks (first baby so was so excited, I know the most important thing is the health etc. but I'm impatient human. ) but they said a girl, then went for a growth scan at about 30 weeks and was told a boy! Then the sonographer at another growth scan refused to say, but it ened up being a boy . They might give you a guess, but it depends on the person doing it really, even if they can sort of see. Besides, I found it heartbreaking when the sex changed (not because I was wanting one more than the other) because you feel like you have almost lost a daughter somehow. Good luck with the scan, but you might have to wait until about 20 weeks (if at all) to find out the sex x

DonDons · 21/11/2007 20:36

Just adding my two-pennerth if it helps... I had my second scan at 14+2 and asked if they could tell yet (after checking everything else etc) - sonographer was lovely (actually 2 of them - one in training so they were looking v closely at everything) - anyhoo - they said it was too early to tell. (PS my hospital are quite happy to tell you at the 20 week scan BUT only if the mother wants to know apparently (ie they won;t tell just the dad). Good luck!

FioFio · 21/11/2007 21:47

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NorthernLurker · 21/11/2007 21:48

Hear, hear Fio

spugs · 22/11/2007 08:33

i had a scan at 14 weeks and they said it was too early to tell. they could at my 20 weeks scan though and were fairly certain it was a girl. it was nice to find out but we would not have gone mad if the sonographer couldnt tell. i know there are some girls at the hospital im at who have came out in floods after being told there baby wasnt what they had wanted or that they couldnt see! my cousins girl friend did find out at 16 weeks what she was having.

ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands · 22/11/2007 19:08

Just seen this!! Hear hear Fio indeed.

FioFio · 22/11/2007 19:14

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hunkermunker · 22/11/2007 19:16

Sweetbean, it was the "gentle persuasion, crying and stamping feet" that made me post as I did about sonographers having an important job to do and getting upset about parents who get cross with them for not telling them the gender if they can't see it or can't because of policy.

And your subsequent recent replies have confirmed my opinion.

I hope your scan goes well tomorrow.