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Pregnancy

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Original poster

3 month old overnight with babysitter?

60 replies

legovsfoot · 31/05/2021 09:13

Hi all, I'm almost due with LO and have been invited to an event when he will be 3 months old.

It's a bit of a drive so we're getting a hotel room overnight.

In your opinion is this too young to be left overnight with a babysitter? Would a babysitter take a baby this young? (Family not an option)

Thank you

OP posts:

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MissingTheMoonlight · 31/05/2021 21:02

100% no from me. DS was up every 90 minutes to 3 hours for a feed at that age and wouldn't even accept DH with a bottle, it had to be me with a boob.

Monkeytapper · 31/05/2021 21:05

When my sis in laws sister got married they organised and hired a babysitter near where they were staying who stayed in the hotel room for the evening .You can then keep popping up to check on you baby. Think babysitter stayed till 11pm ish, is that an option?

AliasGrape · 31/05/2021 21:16

I really think it's one of those things you would have to wait and see. I have a ten month old - we still cosleep though working on transitioning to cot, she will only really settle for me and I couldn't even breastfeed so its not milk related, it's just how it is. I'm only JUST starting to leave her for a few hours here and there with her dad, and once for about 40 mins with her grandparents.

Prior to having her I wouldn't have predicted I'd be the co-sleeping attachment type mum, and I had an event planned when she was about 5 months that I was sure when pregnant that I'd be able to go to (it was cancelled due to covid in the end), but I never really want to leave her as it turns out and she turned out to be a velcro baby that only ever contact naps and refused to be put down. I don't think you'll know what kind of baby you will have and also how you'll feel as a mum till the time. How definite do you need to be in your rsvp/booking - is there any scope for flexibility?

Aquamarine1029 · 31/05/2021 21:19

I wouldn't have left my kids at that age overnight for anything aside from a massive emergency, and definitely not with a stranger.

Allthingspeaches · 31/05/2021 21:21

Maybe you have the option of booking a second room and asking a family member to stay with the baby in the hotel until you return and then they have a room to sleep in?

AnneLovesGilbert · 31/05/2021 21:21

I wouldn’t have done it. The event must sound amazing that you’re considering it.

Greenmarmalade · 31/05/2021 21:21

No- far too soon. Don’t make plans to be away for more than a couple of hours for at least 6 months it you’ll just be stressed or disappointed

TuesdayRuby · 31/05/2021 21:22

I BF and expressed so had no issues with leaving my DD with my mum and going out. Like pp said, some parents needs a break. Some parents couldn’t bear to be away from their babies, some relish a night off. No either one is the right way, it’s just how you feel!
Having said that, I was lucky my mum was on hand to help. I think I would have felt more nervous going with a babysitter. If it’s a wedding (I presume) can the people who live in that area recommend anyone they or friends they know have used, and trust? At least you have peace of mind it’s a recommendation.

Everydayiwakeupanditsmonday · 31/05/2021 21:22

For me that would be far too early. I couldn’t leave my 2 year old with a babysitter overnight.

Original poster

legovsfoot · 31/05/2021 21:23

Thanks all

@SillyBry amazing your dd was sleeping 11-6 - hopefully I get one of those!

I guess I'll have to wait and see

OP posts:

User0ne · 31/05/2021 21:24

Are you able to take DC along with you? With Ds1 I went out loads and just took him in the sling; it got harder as he got oland needed entertaining.

SillyBry · 31/05/2021 21:28

@legovsfoot I think she has spoilt me forever though... I’m expecting my second now and feel like it’s going to be a VERY rude awakening! 😂

Em39ma · 31/05/2021 21:29

I was the nanny that did over nights. It really depends on you, but I would suggest you ask where you are staying if they have a babysitter.
I use to do stuff for hotels and gives you the peace of mind of having baby close by and having a qualified nanny looking after your child.
They use to phone me beforehand so I knew them and what they were looking for.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 31/05/2021 21:29

@welshladywhois40

It's not so much the overnight but the time apart. They are so little and you will become their world.

I would prefer to take my baby and see if I can get a babysitter at the event.

There is an app called bubble you could look at for baby sitters.

I was in hospital for 3 nights when DS6 was just 6 weeks old, then again for 2 nights when he was 3 months old.

I was only able to see him once a day for about 30 mins. It didn't affect anything, in fact even having to completely stop bf for the time because of medicines luckily didn't change a thing, I was able to go bavk to bf both times (had to pump & dump while in hospital).

no need to guilt trip. babies are resilient, a night away isn't even a blip on the radar.

dottiedaisee · 31/05/2021 21:29

I left my daughter at 10 weeks with my Mother and we were all absolutely fine . I don’t think I would leave with a babysitter unless I new that person really well .

PicklePuckle · 31/05/2021 21:36

I hated my DS having sleepovers and she was 8 the last time she went! It was very strange her not being around

SinkGirl · 31/05/2021 21:48

I was separated from my twins a lot when they were tiny - one was in hospital for 17 days, the other for two months. Then within a week or so of coming home he was readmitted to the paeds HDU and I had to stay with him for 11 days so was separated from the other twin. It’s bloody awful and definitely wouldn’t have done it by choice. In fact they’re 4.5 now and neither of us have been away from them overnight since those early months in hospital - I’m sure we would have done if we had family to help out, but they both have additional needs so it’s not straightforward.

Sunflowergirl1 · 31/05/2021 21:52

No way would I leave them..not even with family overnight. I did leave on at 6 weeks for a wedding with family. Came back after the reception before returning for the evening bash. Oh and we drove so could return

FTEngineerM · 31/05/2021 21:59

I don’t think it’s a prob for the baby at all.

I tried a night away at 4 months but I ended up crying at 11pm walking out of the hotel and MIL picked me up and took me back to hers (where DC was). I think it’s a major case of pfb though because eh was legit fine, I pumped enough to feed him for a few days and he always took a bottle ok.

doadeer · 31/05/2021 22:02

It's personal of course but no way could I have done this. I was also still pretty ropey physically and breastfeeding. I wouldnt have wanted to leave him whatsoever.

Patapouf · 31/05/2021 22:02

Good grief, it is definitely much much too young. Can you get a grandparent to come with you to babysit as a compromise?

BrilliantBetty · 31/05/2021 22:03

Definitely not. Far too young imo

BrilliantBetty · 31/05/2021 22:08

Also, FWIW 3 months postpartum I still felt awful physically / mentally / emotionally.
I wouldn't have wanted to attend any wedding (or event) at that point.

Serafinaaa · 31/05/2021 22:12

I couldn't have left my 3 month old. He woke every two hours and was breastfed on demand. I did take him to a wedding though at that age. I wore him in a sling most of the day and evening and he napped and chilled.

ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba · 31/05/2021 22:12

probably best to not make solid plans just yet. see how you both are.

DS1 was foreceps delivery, I had a massive episiotomy and the scar took 8 months to heal properly. I couldn't have sat through an event longer than an hour from the pain.

DS4 was ELSC but we had a hell of a ride for 8 weeks after he was born so no way I would've had energy or motivation to go anywhere at 3m post birth.

DD (#6) was a superb birth, no stitches, no pain afterwards. we had her baptism & party when she was just 11 days old, I was fit as a fiddle, full of energy.

you can just never know how YOU will be, you may or may not be ready. best of luck

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