Giving birth

[maria1995xxx]

Hi I was wondering how bad the cramping is during contractions and the pushing stage. Like will I still be able to breathe if I didn't use gas and air? How many of you think it's made you neauseous? Also regarding epidural I don't think I want one because it can make you not know when to push etc I've heard anyway. This is my first baby and I want it all to be as natural as possible but with a good understanding of pain too.

First time I ended up with an epidural because it was an induction and it was incredibly painful. That sort of pain where you want to roll into a ball and cry or scream.

Second time I had gas and air and then a shot of something - diamorphine? The shot lasted 3/4 of the labour, it just took the edge off and gave me a rest from the contraction pain. It wasn’t anywhere near the first time but still painful.

I wouldn’t be too quick to write off using some kind of pain relief if you need it. Sometimes you just need a little something to give you the time to rest, it almost knocks you out - of course you’re awake but it just makes you relaxed and takes the edge off, almost like having a couple of glasses of wine.

I practiced hypnobirthing loads and that really helped me stay calm and focused and I definitely think it reduced my pain because I wasn’t tense or stressed but ultimately I had a synthetic drug causing intense contractions so doesn’t matter how much I tried to focus on my breath - it fucking hurt

I would recommend doing your research and being totally clued up on your options and the possible routes but I would just keep an open mind.

Congratulations and good luck! Once baby is out you get this rush of “oh that wasn’t so bad” (well some of us do!)

I had gas and air and I found it really helped and didn't make me nauseous. The gas and air was enough for me throughout although I did ask for an epidural at about 10cm dilated, but it was too late and I think I was in the "transition phase". It was painful but it comes and goes in waves through most of it and I found the gas and air made it manageable. Everyone deals with pain differently and I had quite a steady labour, not too fast or slow, which helped.

I’d be open minded that your birth plan might not go how you want tbh - i was the same as you wanting a natural birth - wanted to be in the pool etc

Ended up in agony from a back to back labour for 35 hours - had to have an epidural as the pain was so unbearable in my back! The epidural was amazing - no pain at all - but frustrating to not be able to walk around

Then I never progressed past 2cm and was rushed for emergency c section when baby got into distress!

Soo yeah by all means have a plan - but be prepared it might not be a choice.

Best thing is not to plan what you want and go with the flow.
I had to be induced, ended up with an epidural as the pain was immense and I was physically and mentally drained and the epidural was amazing.
My son however became stuck, with cord around the neck, I had to be cut, forceps and vontouse cup, his heart rate dipping, I needed a blood transfusion etc. It was horrendous and my baby went to NICU ..I was not prepared for so much going wrong.

@Heyahun

I’d be open minded that your birth plan might not go how you want tbh - i was the same as you wanting a natural birth - wanted to be in the pool etc

Ended up in agony from a back to back labour for 35 hours - had to have an epidural as the pain was so unbearable in my back! The epidural was amazing - no pain at all - but frustrating to not be able to walk around

Then I never progressed past 2cm and was rushed for emergency c section when baby got into distress!

Soo yeah by all means have a plan - but be prepared it might not be a choice.

Omg 😱 , thank you for sharing your experience. Do you know what caused the baby to go into distress? Also about the cord... what causes this and did you know this was the situation when in hospital straight away or did it gradually wrap around sort of thing ..?

@Namechange1991x

Best thing is not to plan what you want and go with the flow. I had to be induced, ended up with an epidural as the pain was immense and I was physically and mentally drained and the epidural was amazing. My son however became stuck, with cord around the neck, I had to be cut, forceps and vontouse cup, his heart rate dipping, I needed a blood transfusion etc. It was horrendous and my baby went to NICU ..I was not prepared for so much going wrong.

Omg 😱 , thank you for sharing your experience. Do you know what caused the baby to go into distress? Also about the cord... what causes this and did you know this was the situation when in hospital straight away or did it gradually wrap around sort of thing ..?

Go in with an open mind. On my birth plan I said no to everything. But... I was in labour for 31 hours, I had everything I was offered including gas and air, pethidine (made me sick), epidural, that was heaven. I knew when I needed to push, and it didn't hurt at all, 15 minutes pushing an episiotomy and my boy was here.
No two births are the same though, so again just go in with an open mind

Another shout here for Positive Birth Company digital hypnobirthing pack.

Totally rewired my brain, and instead of contractions being painful, I just felt them as extremely powerful waves over my abdomen. They were so intense, I don't think I'd have been able to even breathe without doing the hypnobirthing course, but it meant I really enjoyed my labour, and didn't use any pain relief. The pushing stage was the best part, as it was such a feeling of relief with every contraction.

Don't get me wrong, it was still the hardest thing I've ever done, but I guess that's why it's called labour.

Gas and air didn’t make me feel sick, the midwives told me how best to use it to reduce the risk of nausea. But I’d been retching earlier in labour and had been given an anti sickness tablet about 6 hours before I started on the gas and air, not sure if it would still have been having an effect and maybe that’s why the g&a didn’t cause nausea.
I also found that gas and air didn’t really do much for me though. My mum had said it gave her a lovely relaxed, spaced out feeling but I didn’t feel that, and didn’t think it helped much with the pain either tbh.
But I was still just about able to cope. I had a water birth at home so other pain relief options weren’t available. My labour was pretty much bang on 24 hours from the first thought of “what was that, that felt different, was that a contraction?” to birth.

Welcome to MN :)

Hi I was wondering how bad the cramping is during contractions and the pushing stage.

errr... quite bad :o It's hard to quantify, to be honest.

Like will I still be able to breathe if I didn't use gas and air?

Yes, you can breathe. Contractions don't stop you from breathing. In fact, it's a good idea to practice relaxation breathing techniques as holding your breath will make the pain worse.

How many of you think it's made you neauseous?

Labour, or gas and air? Gas and air was marvellous and didn't make me nauseous at all, but I did vomit a bit during my first labour (not the second).

Also regarding epidural I don't think I want one because it can make you not know when to push etc I've heard anyway.

The midwives will be able to tell you when to push if you've had an epidural, so I wouldn't worry about this. There are reasons to get one and reasons not to - ultimately unless you're being induced or have a specific reason to want one, I would recommend waiting and deciding on the day. You might not need it or you might be begging for anything to make it stop!

This is my first baby and I want it all to be as natural as possible but with a good understanding of pain too.

IME the best thing you can do is learn about the physiological process of birth as it helps you understand and process what will happen. If you have the option, see if you can sign up for antenatal classes. NCT are good or there may be independent companies in your local area. This should also enable you to look into different methods of pain relief.

You can and should also ask your midwife for advice as she will know what is available at your local hospital or birth centre.

The more natural methods are:
Using a birthing pool, or having a bath or shower - you don't have to actually give birth in the pool, but if you're low risk you can.
Positioning and active labour - moving around, squatting, being on all fours.
Massage/pressure points from a birth partner
Hypnobirthing - breathing and relaxation techniques similar to meditation.
General relaxation/mood - the more relaxed you feel, the more able you will be to cope with labour, so it can help to choose a trusted person for your birth partner, and be in an environment you feel comfortable in whether that's hospital/birth centre/home.
TENS - you can hire a machine from various chemists, it's electrical pulses which go into your back and help distract you from the pain. I hated it, lots of people love it.
Homeopathy / Rescue Remedy etc - I don't know much about these but allegedly you can use them.

Then you have various medical methods:
Normal painkillers - paracetamol, codeine. Can help take the edge off the early stages if it's going on for a while. Won't be enough for the later stages.
Gas and air - good as it's patient controlled and stops immediately.
Pethidine - lasts for about 4 hours, similar to morphine. Can cause breathing issues for baby/make baby sleepy if given too close to delivery.
Epidural - several types, including mobile where you can still walk around or one which totally numbs you from the waist down. You can also choose to let it wear off for the pushing stage.
Spinal block - this is normally only for c-sections.

You can combine some types of pain relief together. Obviously you can't have anything electrical or that would make you drowsy while actually in the pool.

Definitely get an epidural if you have the drip. Gas and air was useless in my first labour but great in my second. Pethadine was trippy in my first but great second time. Standing under a hot shower great first time didn’t get off the bed second time. Tens machine good and so is a hot water bottle. They wouldn’t refill it for me though so take a flask of boiling water.
Exhaustion makes the pain worse.
I didn’t feel sick at all.

It can be risky to ask for birth stories while pregnant as you need to be very thick skinned

I had a prem baby (a few weeks early), gas an air didn't make me feel sick but I didn't feel it did much. Labour was about 90 mins all in and pushing felt like maybe around 20? Baby was under 6lbs and my midwife was great so I had zero tearing - the pushing part was like an absolute ring of fire but it was over quickly and as soon as baby's head was out it didn't hurt anymore (apart from the injection in the leg for the placenta).

It's def doable in my opinion but I feel I was lucky with a small baby and quick labour.

I attended a hypnobirth class and read a book but used none of it on the labour ward

It's common for the baby's cord to be around their neck, and most of the time this is not a cause for concern. If it's wrapped very tightly then it can be a problem but there's nothing you can do to influence this kind of thing, so best to stick to the parts you can control and let the midwives and doctors worry about any emergencies - if anything like that happens, they will tell you what to do so don't worry :)

I didn't know it had been debunked that epidural increases the risk of instrumental delivery!! This was the main reason I was anxious about having one! And I'm on my third! :o

I will be reading that pronto.

Look in to hypnobirthing is my best advice.

I was in early labour for 5 days and the pain was excruciating for most of that. I had a lot of pain medications and eventually and epidural.

This time I'm really hoping for a pool birth.

Every labour is different and doesn't just depend on the persons pain threshold (mines pretty high).

With DC1 it was like I was being torn apart from inside at my belly button. It wasn't cramping, it was more of a ripping, clawing pain. Hard to describe but nothing at all like cramping. It also didn't abate between contractions and there was base level of high pain that was constant. It was horrible. I had no pain relief but was begging for it.

DC2 was more wave like and between contractions there was no pain. I get awful IBS about once or twice a year and this labour was like that times 10. Thankfully I got a c section before the pain got too bad (I had a planned c section booked but went in to labour before my date).

No amount of money in the world could entice me to have a natural labour again. It's barbaric. At times I genuinely wanted to die it was so horrific. I considered aborting DC2 because I didn't want to experience that pain again.

No one ever told me that i between contractions, you have no pain!!! I had both my babies in water using gas and air. my two midwives and my husband never left me. this kept me very calm and i remember just listening to my body, relaxing and feeling confident.

My first baby's was 10.2lbs and my second 8lbs. Two perfect births, no tears, no stitches all very positive!

@maria1995xxx apparently he would have got tangled it in much earlier in the pregnancy, around 20 weeks they said. They never told me if it was seen on ultrasound, but weirdly I'd researched hiccups as my son had them repeatedly in the womb and saw some info that suggested the cord may be being compressed by being tangled up etc, but when I asked drs weren't concerned, but I was worried as he hiccuped loads and didn't move regularly..but I was right! He had it twice around his neck and so as he was coming down it was lowering his heart rate. It was so scary especially when they couldn't get him out with forceps so tried the suction cup, then more people come in and they managed with the forceps..he was so.bruised and battered and wasn't long before he was taken to NICU, low blood sugars, tongue tie, jaundice..I thought he was going to be disabled. It was truly horrendous and there is little support for the mum afterwards physically or mentally. They didn't pick up on me needing a blood transfusion for days as someone had incorrectly documented they had done the blood test but hadn't. 16 months on I'm still traumatised, developed severe PND and had therapy for the birth trauma. We ended up complaining because so much went wrong and they had 'lost' half my notes..somedays the memories come back and it is so hard to deal with.

whattodo2019 I was the opposite, people told me there would be breaks between the pains but there wasn't! I felt lied to.

I also had no breaks between contractions. Just solid pain. But I found it manageable because I have had very painful periods all my life. I just had 2 paracetamol and no gas an air because I progressed so quickly

This is my first baby and I want it all to be as natural as possible but with a good understanding of pain too

We all said this...

The gas and air is not required to help you breathe; it;s just a mild pain relief. If you don't take the G and A you'll be able to breathe no problems at all.

In my teens I used to get bad period cramps, and when I was in hard labour (the pushing stage) it was that same type of pain.

If you have an epidural, and can't feel the contractions, the midwife will monitor them,tell you when you're contracting and when to push.

Go to antenatal classes and you'll be taught all you need to know, by midwives.

Congrats on your baby

For my first child, I had a birth plan that I laminated - it didn’t go to plan at all. Second child, I didn’t even bother putting a birth plan together and just went with the flow. Every labour is different and the best advice I can give is to do lots of research on your birthing and pain relief options and be prepared to be flexible with these in labour if things aren’t going according to plan. With regards to pain relief, listen to your body and go with your feelings at the time of labour - no one gives you a medal afterwards for enduring pain, so be kind to yourself!

Our eldest had cord round neck, hubby said she was blue when she came out but I didn't see her until they'd sorted her out. I had induction so was on monitors the whole time after waters broken so it was picked up very quickly. Being on monitors is like being chained to the bed, I had them on with 2nd too as he had meconium in waters. Our 3rd I was free to walk around which is really helpful with pain management, best vb by far for me. Had an elcs with breech twins last time and hoping for vbac this time.

The best mindset I had was literally just go with it. You have no choice the baby is coming . I didn't care how my baby got here as long as he was healthy and safe. Best mindset to have. My midwife and HV both mentioned how calm I was. I was surprised myself.

I was induced and had gas and air and pethidine. The pethidine made me throw up so had anti sickness injection after. The pethidine did allow me to have short naps in between contractions which helped a lot.

You can breathe. You just feel very tired. They took the gas and air away when I was pushing and you do feel a massive burning sensation when your baby's head is crowning but your body naturally pushes past the burning sensation. Bit like a bad Chinese burn. I did have a 2nd degree tear which I actually didn't feel at all. 30 minutes after having DS they numbed me and sewed it up that wasn't painful just felt like a tugging sensation.

Once my waters were broken I went from 3cm-10cm in about an hour so that was quite quick with intense contractions but the midwife was massaging my back and it really helped. I found for me being on all fours made me dilate quicker and I managed my contractions better on all fours or hanging off the bed with my arms perched up on the bed. I managed to rock myself better that way.