Anyone else not care at all about the sex?

[0xalis]

All I want is a healthy baby, boy or girl I'll be glad to have either!! I always found gender disappointment a little silly. Gender is not the entire determining factor of the kid's personality after all. We chose a unisex name for any baby we have that's born alive (already one miscarriage under our belt, very glad we chose to just nickname the fetuses and save the name!) I don't want to get too attached to any expectations of my child, including their gender, since I know they're going to be their own person with their own ideas about stuff. If we had room for a nursery I'd go with a pastel yellow one! We won't be having a gender reveal of any kind either, I'll just tell people as they ask once we know. I'm not trying to judge those who do care about this, but I personally don't and want to know if anyone else here feels the same way!

I agree OP apart from my aunt who had 5 boys and longed for a girl! I can understand that tbh. The 6th child was a girl.

@Trinacham .. I had no preference but the Op is being very short sighted to think that her situation is the same as someone with 4 boys for example !
I actually have a son with sn and I wish he was 'healthy ' as everyone says but sadly he isn't so his sex is completely irrelevant to me too!

There's a big difference between having a preference, and wanting to know the gender. I'm pregnant with my first and genuinely had no preference but still wanted to know, mainly because I'm impatient! It also helped to make the pregnancy feel more real to me rather than somewhat abstract.

I definitely do not understand disappointment when it comes to first babies, I can understand if it's your 5th or something and you've had 4 of the same gender so far. Wouldn't make me love the child any less though.

I can't for the life of me understand why someone (pp who took offence) would keep questioning themselves however long later why they didn't have a girl. You do know how biology works right? It's a 50:50 chance of getting a boy or girl, there's no reason behind it!

To the person who called me offensive: I want it to be known, due to this, that my partner is transgender so I actually find "gender disappointment" offensive myself. I am not trying to be rude, so I left that part of my feelings out of the conversation! Anyway, thanks to everyone else who chimed in, it's nice to know I'm not the only one.

Also, considering I suffer from fertility issues and my first baby died from a miscarriage, it always ruffles my feathers even worse now. People complaining about several healthy children is pretty infuriating when you struggle to even have one.

I thought I didn't care. Then I did the NIPT with my 3rd and found out the sex, and went around the room screaming "IT'S A GIRL!!!"

I only ever read on here of people being disappointed they’re having a boy. Even the poster who responded on page one. When there is a ‘gender disappointment’ thread you know it will be that they wanted a girl.

I wouldn’t have minded either sex. I don’t try and attach ridiculous stereotypes (which the disappointed posts usually refer to) to sex so there was no reason to have preference.

I can understand if it's your 5th or something and you've had 4 of the same gender so far. Wouldn't make me love the child any less though

Even then though, you still have a 50:50 chance of either sex. You should always get pregnant because you want a child, not a boy/girl.

If you’re only continuing to have children because the previous ones are the “wrong” sex, you should stop having children.

@Kollamoolitumarellipawkyrollo

I only ever read on here of people being disappointed they’re having a boy. Even the poster who responded on page one. When there is a ‘gender disappointment’ thread you know it will be that they wanted a girl.

I wouldn’t have minded either sex. I don’t try and attach ridiculous stereotypes (which the disappointed posts usually refer to) to sex so there was no reason to have preference.

Because the boards are largely women, the only dissapointment I have heard men have is that they are having a girl. I guess it goes both ways.

All I ever wanted was two of the same. So now I have a preference for baby two but didn't care for baby one. I think it's nicer for the children to have a brother if they're a boy or a sister if they're a girl. Even logistics for sharing beds on holiday or camping etc. Makes life easier in my opinion!

We chose not to find out gender with our second because of the pink frilly rubbish we were given for DD, couldn't say no either as it felt rude. It's been much easier this time.

Would you not love your baby if it wasn't healthy?

I didn't care either so long as my baby was healthy. I didn't find out the sex before the birth.

The midwives I saw for my antenatal appointments thought i was having a boy. I thought I was having a girl and then she was born!

I was really silly, I wanted a girl quite badly.i think because I was so close to my niece and she just happened to be a lot like me , so it was just vanity really.
I did feel disappointed when I found out i was having a boy , i am ashamed of that , but that's what happened.
Anyway of course he is my absolute world now , hes 7 . I wouldn't swap him for a girl and I dont want any more kids .
Coincidentally said niece has now got a sister that is an absolute nightmare lol so the gender doesn't matter at all , every child is different.
OP if you want to think less of me that is your right but you did ask for truthful experience

@bluebluezoo

I can understand if it's your 5th or something and you've had 4 of the same gender so far. Wouldn't make me love the child any less though

Even then though, you still have a 50:50 chance of either sex. You should always get pregnant because you want a child, not a boy/girl.

If you’re only continuing to have children because the previous ones are the “wrong” sex, you should stop having children.

Oh yes I totally agree, no one should ever have a child simply because they want a particularly gender. But I'm more likely to understand a pang of disappointment from someone in this situation than someone who's disappointed that their first child is a boy.

I really really do not understand where boy disappointment has come from and tbh its only something I've come across on MN. What's the reasoning? It is just because you can't put a tacky pink bow in a boys hair or something??? I just don't get it!!!

I found out the sex of my dd through a blood test at 10 weeks. Having had a mmc in my previous pregnancy, I wanted to give the baby an identity because it pained me not to know who my lost baby was. In my head, he's a little angel boy.

I truly, truly didn't mind either way and just wanted to give birth to a healthy baby, which I did. Since giving birth 5 months ago, all I've heard is, "Are you trying for a boy next?". It took me 2.5 years to get my dd, I certainly wouldn't try for any particular sex.

I did experience in my pregnancy, some (seemingly older male family members) express disappointment and when I told them I was having a girl.

“I only ever read on here of people being disappointed they’re having a boy. Even the poster who responded on page one. When there is a ‘gender disappointment’ thread you know it will be that they wanted a girl.

I wouldn’t have minded either sex. I don’t try and attach ridiculous stereotypes (which the disappointed posts usually refer to) to sex so there was no reason to have preference.

Because the boards are largely women, the only dissapointment I have heard men have is that they are having a girl. I guess it goes both ways

I don’t think it goes both ways to the same extent-maybe none of the men I know have said anything or maybe it because I’m not on a forum to see anonymous male comments but I haven’t heard men be anti girl in the same way. Also, I have never seen one thread ( in the 6 years on here) that has been about disappointment it’s a girl. Which is good obviously but not great that boys are seen to be more disappointing.

I wanted a boy but only because I knew my partner wanted one. I didn’t want to feel the pressure to keep having more children until we had a boy to please my husband as I didn’t want lots of children! For myself I wasn’t bothered either way and bought lots of beautiful unisex clothes I prefer that aesthetic anyway