First pregnancy - what do we NOT need

[Nesski]

Hello! There are so many 'must-haves' these days with all these bloggers and the internet is poised to only sell you more things, who knows how our parents managed back then! As an example, I'm not sure if I need to buy a cot and just purchase a mattress for the baby after a few months, after nailing everything to the wall of course.

Could I ask you ladies to help give us first time mums advice on

1. what you have regretted buying/could probably do without
2. what we should wait to buy until after the birth to arrive

I'm not planning on buying anything until 1/2 months before the baby is due! Any advice would be appreciated!

Off the top of my head:

You can use the pram cot around the house in place of a Moses basket.

Don't bother with a top and tail bowl, a tuppaware box works just as well.

Newborn toiletries aren't needed, if their skin is dry just use a bit of coconut oil.

We got loads of blankets, muslins, socks and bibs as gift so you might not have to buy many of these things.

I highly recommend you get a sling!

LOVED the 'Swaddle Up' sleeping bag/swaddle by 'Love to Dream' and swear it got me extra sleep in the early days. Highly recommend! Sling also a great purchase as PP said.

Haaka milk collector is essential if you're planning to breastfeed - great cheap purchase!

Bought lots of newborn clothes but DS was 10lbs and never fit in any of them, so that was a waste of time!

Got loads of toiletries as gifts and still haven't bought a single bottle of bath bubble/baby oil etc. so wouldn't bother with that.

Bought a proper button up nightie and gown for the hospital and didn't ever wear it, laboured in a big t shirt.

Ooh, I have more to add.

I initially breastfed then had to move on to formula.

For breastfeeding, my best purchases were the Haaka and Lansinoh nipple cream - must haves.

For FF and expressing, the Mam bottles are amazing and I've never had to buy a steriliser as they're 'self sterilising' - you just put a bit of water in them then microwave them. Same with the pots the Mam dummies come in.

@edin16 thank you for the suggestions, I don't want lots of bulky things in the house which I'd have to get rid of after a few month, it seems like everyone has a Moses basket these days!

@bluebearss some really great suggestions, although I am planning to breastfeed I'm not sure if I'd take to it. My mum didn't express enough milk for any of the four is us so wondered if it was hereditary, worth the wait until after the baby has arrived you reckon?

Top and tail bowl is pointless. Baby bath is just big and bulky, just get a bath seat. Just get baby bath and shampoo, don’t bother with all the other talcs/lotions etc.

We regretted buying a changing table but it's become a place to store things. Instead we found that changing mats were great and kept one upstairs and one downstairs.

We got given a lot of toiletries from the midwife but my LO was allergic so we ended up just going with Johnson's, once we could bath them.

I was really thankful for my blankets and sleeping bag for my LO as they were a winter baby and we appreciated the extra layers. That and a snowsuit for going outside but our friends gave us a hand me down.

A baby bath and changing table were our top two biggest wastes of both money and space!

Oh and my most useful purchase was a closer caboo sling which I used for both DC. It makes the 'Velcro' weeks/months so much easier with free hands and hopefully a quick and easy way to get baby to settle.

Don't need

• nappy bin, terrible for environment as its double the plastic

• baby bath, waste of time use the sink or bring them in with you. Place towel in bottom of bath when they're older

• baby shoes of any form before they can walk

• baby towels. Get normal towels

• cotton wool or wipes.

Do need

• Use cheeky cloth wipes

• Zip up sleep suits

Get a “Shnuggle” bath! I struggled to bathe my slippery newborn with a regular baby bath. I came accords it when my son had a short stay in hospital at 3 months- it was a game changer!

Do not bother with a changing table. My son is 2 now and I’ve used it twice!

Nappy bin, top and tail bowl, breast pump ( until you are sure you are breastfeeding and even then,Can you be arsed to pump as well as breast feed - or will you just top up with formula when you introduce a bottle?).

Baby toiletries. Just baby shampoo and water will do.
Dribble bibs and muslins. Had loads of these and non of my babies were sicky or dribbley. Just get one pack of Muslins to begin with.

Coats. Pain in the bum. You feel like you are breaking their arms putting them in them. Just put them in a babygrow. And tuck in blankets around them in the car seat/ pram ( you will be given/knitted a gazilian blankets) . Maybe a snow suit in the depths of winter on a pram walk.

Bath in the bathroom sink the first couple of months. But after that I swore by the angel care bath support ( you can have both arms free with them on this) in an ikea baby bath. Saves a fortune on water if you are on a meter. My 4 year old still likes to go in the baby bath as she can get it nice and deep. So def not a waste of money.

Also I loved our changing table. It saved my back. And still use with the two year old. He stands on it and puts his feet directly into the pull up nappy for me. Again saving me crouching down. Also keeps all the paraphernalia in one place.

One of my most useful purchases was a wooden toy storage unit with plastic boxes, which was about waist height. I used it as a changing table until they could roll. Then I changed them on the floor and the table was used for toy and clothes storage.

It lasted for about 12 years until the children broke the shelves climbing on it. I don’t know if you can buy them now but it looked like this.

Baby hats - you don't need as many as you think. Not wooo that's, but the cottony ones they say you need to put on them in hospital. We had tonnes from different 'newborn sets' and gifts etc. We barely used them.

Scratch mits - buy baby grows with bits that flap over the baby's hands. The mittens fall off.

Baby shoes - we didn't buy any but we're given lots. They never got worn.

Must haves - when I was buying bits, I forgot to buy socks. Don't forget socks.

By 'wooo that's', I mean woolly hats 🙄

There’s been a really good thread on this recently.

I’ve not bothered with nursery furniture, a nappy bin, steriliser, Moses basket.

Baby clothes - fancy stuff is a night mare to put on and off- a few cardis and baby grows and vests short sleeves.

• Sock Ons a gimmick

-For space saving I loved a collapsible folding baby with insert.

• Connecta sling was immense and didn't need a degree like the ergo baby.

-Breast feeding pillow - use a thick normal One. -Steriliser - we used the microwave for when I pumped but the haakaa worked better for Me that the medala powered one. -Never cover the buggy with a Muslin or blanket ever- it is proven to overheat even in winter - a mesh buggy cover black out is best - lots to choose from.

• we whacked a non slip under mat from

Wilko under the change mat on top of a chest of drawers - don't buy expensive change mats as you do change them.

• def get drawer inserts for baby stuff- including one that starts empty and you can shove outgrown stuff in quickly so you do t get your partner show horning your giant baby into too small stuff glares at husband
• foam squares for the floor get a munchkin and bear mat as much more easy to stare

At!

• get bamboo nursing pads as you can the. Use them for makeup remover

Pads if you don't use them as I didn't leak etc !

Iv got a 4 year old 12 week old things that Iv found most used both times:
-bugaboo cam pram we use the carrycot downstairs through the day for naps and go for a long walk everyday i have found it really sturdy, easy to drive and is on to its second child with heavy use and still in good shape!
-close caboo sling
-Hakka breast pump/milk collector thing
-maxi-cosi kori rocker chair (folds flat for easy storage under sofa)
-loads of Muslins
-shnuggle bath tub
-tuppence and crumble star blanket-save yourself the fight that is baby snow suits and coats this thing is immense!

Stuff I wouldn’t bother with/hardly use:
-Moses basket
-nappy bin
-changing table
-top and tail bowl
-‘outfits’ much easier in vest and baby grows for the first couple of months
-scratch mits/cotton hats/baby shoes
-electric breast pump (I just don’t respond it very well I would wait and see how feeding goes before splashing out)

Not needed:

• Dresses, cute outfits, hooded tops, shoes. First 6 months it was all about comfy sleepsuits that are easy to put on and off

• breastfeeding dresses to wear at home. I found that Pyjama bottoms and tops were comfier to wear.

I found changing table very useful and a back saver. I bought it second hand and sold it on when baby was 10months old, but it got used a lot.

+loved a nest first 4 months, (only for supervised naps before someone says it’s dangerous), it was great that I could just carry the baby with me everywhere without disturbing them, easily have a shower etc.

• Breast pump, loads of breast pads - i didn't produce a drop of milk so ended up giving all my stuff away. Wait to see whether you take to breastfeeding before spending out all the money.

• scratch mitts - most sleepsuits have them built in but babies use their hands for sensory so best to just let them have use of their hands (yes they will scratch themselves)

• socks/pram shoes - They dont stay on and just wear sleepsuits to begin with

• hats - our hospital provided a wooly hat which fit great. All the cotton ones were too big or too small.

Thank you all for the things you didn't find useful so far! Not going to lie, I've had to search up a few of the things mentioned as I wasn't sure

The scratch mitts I've seen people use because their baby's nails just grow so quickly, which makes sense!

Yes I was thinking of bathing using the kitchen sink, I don't want to have to buy clunky pieces, trying to be minimalist where we can!

Useful stuff:
Giant bath sponge - big sponge they lie on whilst you bath them which stops then slipping around. We use it in the shower with just the handheld shower head.
Haaka
Second hand clothes bundles from FB marketplace - often around £10 for 20 outfits instead of £10 for one.
Jumperoo from fisher price once they are 4 months+
Tidy tot bib once 6 months+
We actually love our changing table and nappy bin
Baby play mat for tummy time and learning coordination.

Not useful:
Don't buy expensive rockers/bouncers for them as they may not like them. We got a chicco bouncer on FB for £20 that was like new.
Baby bath only used a handful of times
Don't buy loads of bottles, again don't know how they will take to breast or bottle so have one or two available but no need to buy loads

Just helpfully disagreeing with a couple of posts further up

I wouldn’t get a sling till you know how big your baby is - mine came early and was too small for most (easy to use) slings for a couple of months. Sling libraries are great once you have a baby to try them out and get help with fitting then.

A second-hand electric pump (medela swing) cleared a blockage and saved me from mastitis when I was struggling to nurse in the very early days. (To save money you can get them on eBay and just replace the non-cleanable parts with new parts from the manufacturer.) I didn’t like the haakaa, which is recommended above, so everyone’s different. But above all if you’re planning on nursing and not getting a pump, read up on hand expressing, which you will need in the early days. I would’ve been stuck after day 3 without breast pads - reusable ones are good, and muslins. Also get a bottle and some ready made formula as back up in case things don’t go as planned.

You can get good cots and changing tables second hand. I liked the changing table as my knees were shot after pregnancy, but it’s true you don’t need them for more than a few months, and the top of a chest of drawers would do if you are vigilant to stop the baby falling (or ideally the floor if you’re able). Cots are great for containing toddler wanderers, but you don’t need one at newborn stage if you have an overnight-safe bassinet or moses basket, and if you want to skip it, take a look at advice on Montessori sites like aidtolife.org/independence/sleep.html

You don’t need special nursing tops - just a strappy top you can pull down under a t-shirt will do. And get nursing bras that pull aside rather than the clip-release ones. (But wait till your milk comes in before buying!)

Agree with pp on coats and hats.

Most useful: a Morrck pram/car blanket. The harness straps fit through it and it can’t fall off. I love mine. Also like others have said a Haakaa breast pump is genius if you’re breastfeeding.

Least useful: scratch mitts, cotton hats, cellular blankets (sleeping bags are better at night and you can get newborn sizes)

These posts do show how different everyone’s experiences are though. Nappy bin was essential for me as I live in a flat, it was easier and safer to empty the bin once a day than take the used nappy outside at each change. In the early days, changing mats on the floor really hurt my back so my changing table (on top of a chest of drawers) was great and I still use it now DS is 9m, it’s only just starting to get more awkward.