Talk to me about the 2 year age gap!

[Pollypockett23]

Has anyone got a 2 year age gap between their babies?

What's it like?!

Not yet but will have, well almost, 21 months x

It's good. They used to nap together in the double buggy but dd1 was old enough to be entertained by cbeebies if I just needed to sort out dd2. Both in nappies at first so it didn't feel like a big backwards step having a newborn.

Downsides were potty training with a 4mo baby, it's hard to dash for the toilets with a double pushchair, and I went back to work before dd1 got her free hours so the nursery fees were eye watering for a few months.

Mine just turned 2 and I’m due in 5 weeks. I’m really struggling with parenting a VERY wilful toddler (talking to friends he is possibly somewhat unusually hard work) and pregnancy exhaustion and generally feeling hormonal and emotional. Hilariously, I keep telling myself it will be easier when she’s born... ha!

I had 22 months between mine and it was hard, hard work. There were numerous times I was in tears (my DH works long hours and bedtime was a nightmare as baby DS was a screamer).
So worth it, they have such a lovely bond & it’s so easy now they’re 3 & 5! I don’t regret it at all and I’m so glad I had them closer, there’s actually only one school year between them too.
Congratulations.

Mine are 2.5 years apart and it was hard going but only fur around 8 months as my eldest talked early and was very mature for his age. They're 5 and 7.5 and get on well. You'll be fine👍

I'm at 4yrs and 2yrs now - still feels like hard work. I'm waiting for that day when they'll be best friends forever.

@PolarBearStrength some kids have stying personalities. We can't all have docile kids 😂 best of luck with the new baby. Don't forget to buy eldest present from the baby.

2.5 year age gap and I found it difficult. As a PP has said, it generally means potty training with a newborn. The older one is at that age where they are very independent and probably capable of doing things (climbing on things at the playpark for example) but not enough that you wouldn't want to hover around them, which is hard with a baby sometimes. There's little understanding that when baby is napping or feeding you have to be a) quiet (HA!) and b) patient (HAHAHA).
I think the shorter age gap will show it's worth when they are older, but I see a lot of positives for having a bigger age gap. DS1 is 4 now and having a newborn when he's this age would have been infinitely easier.

23 months between mine. The first 6 months were tough but it does get less fraught. Baby #2 was a dream though, would have been hard with a nightmare baby. Now they are 4 and 6 they play well mostly and have similar interests and needs. But they also fight. And are devious. The little one in particular is constantly goading the bigger one.

Following as mine will have 2yrs and a handful of days between them

I've just made sure mine is potty trained at 2 for when his brother comes in 4 weeks time. So i know it's not going to be easy but that's one thing I don't have to worry about. I can't wait tho, same age difference as me and my sister and we are so close

I had 2 years between my eldest 2 36 years ago and can still remember how jealous my toddler was. My health visitor at the time said she thought that although it was a popular age gap it was probably the worst! She said “ it’s like your husband saying that he loves you so much that he’s bringing another one home just like you and you are all going to live happily together”
By the time they were 4 and 6 they were lifelong best friends.
I had another baby when they were 9 and 7 and that was brilliant
One of my children has 5 years between them and that was really good. Another son has 18 months between toddler and twin babies, hectic!
But all babies are different so who knows?!

I will have a 2.5y gap between my 2 youngest. I've made sure she is already potty trained so thats one less thing to worry about, and am working on night weaning / gentle sleep training in the hopes that she is sleeping through before little sis arrives. Also lots of practice with friends babies so she knows about being gentle and quiet when necessary - the quiet part is proving more of a challenge! Any other tips of how I should be preparing?

Mine are 2.4 years between and are 4 and 6 now, they love each other, it was hard going sometimes in the beginnings but it's a great age difference they both like similar things and play together so well. Goodluck x

Mine are 25 months between and it was and is great now almost 4 and almost 2. But oldest was a very high maintenance baby and youngest was a walk in the park in comparison. 1st I felt like they've failed to issue the manual when I left hospital and 2nd time around I trusted myself and my instincts more. Dc2 also slept much much better. They're the best of friends and thick as thieves now.

@Knittingnanny A gap of slightly less than 2 years usually avoids the jealousy issue. We just brought baby DD home and 20mo DS isn't showing any jealousy at all. He's too young to understand what she is and what the implications are for him.

Interesting read, I’m about five weeks along now so will have a 19 month age gap.
I’m excited and petrified at the same time!

No I won’t, it’ll be 21.
Terrible maths.

25 months between my two, it was very difficult when Ds was newborn. They’re 3 and 1 now and it’s very difficult because they’re both running around. I’m sure in a few years it’ll be better

@anorangeaday you're in the worst possible bit, both mobile, both determined to do what they want to do. I promise it does get better!

25 months between mine and just coming to the end of DC2s first year. I love the gap. No jealousy from my eldest. Mostly just love and they play together nicely. A tip I read on here which worked quite well was remember to 'tell the baby off /say no to baby' when it does something by accident or whatever so your toddler doesnt just see it as the baby is always good and never gets told off when you are likely saying no and telling your eldest not to do things regularly! And big up how grown up your eldest is and encourage that side of them so they feel important and helpful / a bit protective towards the baby. Occasionally my eldest gets frustrated by the youngest, sharing toys etc especially now my youngest can walk so wants everything my eldest has! However I feel it's all normal stuff. I potty trained my eldest before DC2 was born which made things easier. They usually nap at similar times if my eldest has one which isn't as often now but was back when they were just turned 2. There's been moments where one or other has to cry or be left and come second but they would be safe waiting and come to no harm and it's only minutes whilst you juggle before it gets calm again. I love watching them love each other and that makes the harder moments worth it.

25 months between my two as well. Older DS is 3 in a few weeks and baby is 10.5 months.

DS1 is also very wilful and it was the most difficult between 2 and 2yr 8 months, I'm talking tantrums and screaming all bloody day long. The baby is a dream, sleeps well and is basically attached to my boob in the sling all day. Get. A. Sling.

DS 1 stopped napping before baby was born which sucked. We have a buggy board for our little buggy but we live in the city so couldn't do double.

The best word is relentless. The days I have them both I barely get the chance to inhale and exhale before one of them needs me for something. And any housework has just totally gone to shit, its a fucking tip because there are literally not enough hours in the day.

I keep telling myself it will get easier.

I’ll take your word for it @trilbydoll, I can’t wait for the days we can sit down for a meal and not argue

22 month gap. They are 2 and 4 now and thick as thieves. DS has never been jealous of his little sister once and they are close enough in age to be into similar things.

Double buggy was essential as DC1 still napped till DC2 was about 18 months. But I had plenty of afternoons when they were both sleeping and I got a nice break!

A few days short of 25 months here.

Both have multiple food allergies and severe silent reflux, what the hell was I thinking 😅

Eldest was 17 months and mostly settled when I fell pregnant with the second, it was a difficult second pregnancy with hyperemesis, gestational diabetes and pelvic girdle pain. I remember finding the eldest difficult with his medical issues but also not being able to communicate and the frustration that comes with it. I felt he turned the corner at around 18 months so at least he wasn't troublesome during the pregnancy.

He wasn't jealous at all when baby was born, much to my surprise and tbh the hardest thing has been the second having the same, if not worse medical issues to his big brother. He literally cried for 8 months straight and only then started sleeping longer stretches etc. It's been a very bumpy road and now his reflux is more controlled, he's been cutting his molars.

They are 3.5 and 17 months now and looking back I don't know how I did it but the majority of that is to do with the medical issues. They are both very spirited. We potty trained eldest just before 3rd birthday. I didn't mind them both in nappies, In a way it's easier as now the younger one HAS to follow us to the loo every time 🤦‍♀️

They do play together and quibble over the same things at times but as pp said it's all really normal.

My house has had periods of being absolutely upside down (clean but v messy) and it's got me really down even though rational me knows that it's not worth the stress.

There are days when I love it and days when I want to pack my bags lol. I find having zero time for myself quite frustrating. They both sleep well (when not suffering medically) and although I have the evenings to myself I refuse to do chores at that time and I'm also too tired to read a book for example. So I usually sit in front of the TV and then get frustrated with myself for having zero energy to exercise etc. So probably not making the most of it!

For those with older kids, when does it get better? I'm hoping the younger one will turn a corner in the next month or two as he approaches 2