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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Mansplaining pregnancy

38 replies

LaMadrilena · 27/09/2020 10:01

My husband told me the other day that I couldn't possibly be tired, I'm only six weeks gone and it's not like I've got a bump yet or anything...

So come on, I bet some of you have got some gems!

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RustyCat · 27/09/2020 10:13

Mee! I keep getting the 'you only found out you were pregnant 5 minutes ago' if I mention any symptoms -eye roll-.

I would like to note I am 6weeks 5 days found out 3 weeks ago.

He also doesn't seem to understand that sneaking up behind me and groping my boobs when I'm cooking or cleaning is a sure fire way to get a swift elbow in a delicate area, I've explained countless times they are sore and it hurts to walk let alone be grabbed by someone who thinks it's funny to go 'meep meep'. Men!

biscuit13 · 27/09/2020 10:19

Me during 1st trimester: laying on the sofa with constant nausea and being sick every time I move

Husband: "you need to just get up and DO something"

Me: 🤢 "nope"

Original poster
LaMadrilena · 27/09/2020 10:24

@rustycat Mine is so overwhelmed by my new massive hooters that he just stares and dribbles!

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Original poster
LaMadrilena · 27/09/2020 10:24

@biscuit13 Same.

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FoxtrotOscarPoppet · 27/09/2020 10:30

12 weeks today - have had awful nausea and sickness 24/7 to the point where I’ve been signed off work for the last 3 weeks.

He keeps saying “you don’t seem very excited”. Don’t get me wrong I’m thrilled to be pregnant but it’s hard to feel excited and have a smile plastered on one’s face when you’ve got your head over a bowl most of the day.

ChampooPapi · 27/09/2020 10:33

Not a mansplaining thing but maybe a man thing!

My partner complaining 'His belly felt uncomfortable and full' when we were hanging out the washing the other day

I'm 32 weeks pregnant with twins!

Dilligaf81 · 27/09/2020 10:39

My DH told me that "I'm not the only pregnant person in the world and just need to get on with it and stop making a fuss"
I was throwing up 24/7 and this gem was said to me whilst I was cooking Xmas Dinner for us and his colleague and his wife whilst 10 weeks pg and they didn't know. I lost 2 stone and was in and out of hospital with hypremisis with that pregnancy.
I think the adage of there can only be 1 nurse in each relationship is so true, he is useless and just doesn't think when I'm ill.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 27/09/2020 10:43

Yup I'm pregnant with my third. Been really ill. Most of the time he is very sympathetic but when it means he has to actually do some housework it causes problems. I've had "your hardly even pregnant" a few times.

LexiM · 27/09/2020 10:49

I'm 37 weeks pregnant now and I still haven't felt as tired as I did from the early weeks. It really is very draining as baby is doing the most development and I always say you cant understand how tiring it is unless it's happening to you.

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 27/09/2020 10:51

Also, "you just need to get on with it. You will feel better if you get up and do something". Really?? Wow, I had never thought of that. Clearly having been through this twice before, I don't know as much as him. Also I'm still working 10 hours a day, 5 days a week while looking after our kids and doing 98%or the household tasks and childcare. That was said because at the weekend I'm done in and spend a lot of time in my bed.

FizzingWhizzbee123 · 27/09/2020 10:52

Tbf, until I was pregnant I genuinely had no idea how exhausting the first trimester was! I also thought the exhaustion came at the end with the bump! I know better now....

I could have punched my husband when, in my second HG pregnancy, a sonographer suggested the sickness would go away if I ate a bit of dry toast before getting up. Husband then suggested it was “worth a try, it might help”. I was already on strong antiemetics at this point and he’s seen how sick I get. I was not impressed he was still dumb enough to suggest that!

Iminaglasscaseofemotion · 27/09/2020 10:54

@RustyCat

Mee! I keep getting the 'you only found out you were pregnant 5 minutes ago' if I mention any symptoms -eye roll-.

I would like to note I am 6weeks 5 days found out 3 weeks ago.

He also doesn't seem to understand that sneaking up behind me and groping my boobs when I'm cooking or cleaning is a sure fire way to get a swift elbow in a delicate area, I've explained countless times they are sore and it hurts to walk let alone be grabbed by someone who thinks it's funny to go 'meep meep'. Men!

Yup, I told dp over and over again that he can't touch them because they are so sore. The message dodmt seem to sink in with words, so now I hurt him back. That tactic is working much better.
Pearsapiece · 27/09/2020 10:57

Suffering pelvic girdle pain here, dh suggested a walk to move it all around a bit Hmm

CarolVordermansBum · 27/09/2020 10:59

**My partner complaining 'His belly felt uncomfortable and full' when we were hanging out the washing the other day

I'm 32 weeks pregnant with twins!**

The audacity! Grin

CarolVordermansBum · 27/09/2020 11:01

My ex would always say 'you're pregnant, not disabled' every time i asked for any help with anything.

Thankfully my DP was nothing but lovely when I was pregnant with our two!

Pobblebonk · 27/09/2020 11:09

@Dilligaf81

My DH told me that "I'm not the only pregnant person in the world and just need to get on with it and stop making a fuss" I was throwing up 24/7 and this gem was said to me whilst I was cooking Xmas Dinner for us and his colleague and his wife whilst 10 weeks pg and they didn't know. I lost 2 stone and was in and out of hospital with hypremisis with that pregnancy. I think the adage of there can only be 1 nurse in each relationship is so true, he is useless and just doesn't think when I'm ill.
I do hope you told him the rest of Xmas dinner was down to him and walked away?
sunlight81 · 27/09/2020 11:26

I was told that going to bed at 10pm 7 nights a week meant that there was no time for us to spend together. Being tired all the time just made me a fun sponge!!

I'm 6m pregnant with twins, have a 1yo and work 3days a week. I also do ALL night time wake ups as DH "isn't very good in the middle of the night"

I laughed at him (didn't go down well) and asked him for one night a week where he did night wake ups so I could be more refreshed - In the last month I've had 1 "night off" ... it was my birthday!!!

Aspergallus · 27/09/2020 11:34

I think the whole “keep it secret till 12 weeks” thing has done us all a massive disservice. It’s not even that helpful if you do have a mc, because where’s the support if you kept it to yourself?

It is, IMO, the most tiring and symptomatic part of pregnancy, the time of most change hormonally and physically (in 2nd and third trimester everything including baby is pretty much just getting bigger). But the idea it can kept secret suggests that it’s somehow asymptomatic. I don’t think men can be entirely blamed for buying into this.

Yeah later pregnancy is tough, but generally people can see that you might need a seat or help with some physical tasks. And if you are fortunate the worse of the nausea has passed.

In all 3 of mine, I felt I was clinging on with my fingertips until around 17 weeks-ish when I started to feel human again. Such horrendous nausea and fatigue with my 3rd that I spent much of the time between weeks 7 and 12 in bed.

ivfbeenbusy · 27/09/2020 11:34

[quote LaMadrilena]@rustycat Mine is so overwhelmed by my new massive hooters that he just stares and dribbles! [/quote]

At least he looks your way! I'm 19 weeks with twins and have a massive bump already and DH eyes my bump like I'm signourney weaver in Aliens and about to give birth to a new species (and no these aren't our first children so you'd think he'd be over it by now!)

Brandaris · 27/09/2020 11:46

DH prodded my belly and said ‘oh wow it’s really firm!’ In a really surprised voice.

Yes, as you know, it’s full of baby and my internal organs that are being shoved out the way. It’s not all cake as he seemed to think.

Tbf all I could eat in the first trimester was cheese sandwiches and cake so there was definitely some cake there though Grin

BilboBercow · 27/09/2020 12:03

Yep, ex partner when I was hit with horrendous nausea at 6 weeks "it's too early, it must be in your head".

Also my step dad when nausea turned into severe hyperemesis until about 22 weeks "have you thought about hypnotherapy?" It's not fucking psychological you twat, I can't keep a sip of water down!

cat709 · 27/09/2020 12:11

Not quite partner-related, but after posting about my hyperemesis and being sick all day and constant loo breaks in the night, a poster on a different thread told me that it's all in the mindset and I need to think more positively 🙄

RustyCat · 27/09/2020 12:13

@Iminaglasscaseofemotion I did the EXACT same to him when he was making coffee, snuck up and grabbed his chest from behind and made sure to give a good nip whilst meeping he didn't enjoy it 🤣 hopefully it sinks in that it's not funny in general letalone when pregnant and sore.

@LaMadrilena mine haven't really gotten much bigger yet or at least I haven't noticed they have 🤣. I wasn't exactly blessed with big boobs so I'm sure I'll notice if and when they get bigger.

ChampooPapi · 27/09/2020 12:17

@CarolVordermansBum he always gets these 'sympathy pains' when I'm pregnant.

When I was unknowingly starting labour with our first and saying my belly felt unsettled and was hurting, he was very quick to say how his stomach too was feeling 'upset' and was bothering him, that perhaps dinner related?

Considering our first daughter came out of me a few hours later I think we could definitely chalk it down to nothing to do with the sausage and mash!

He is excellent at looking after babies and children, and me as well, so I just dig deep when I'm pregnant so I don't throw things at him.

His latest cracker was this morning when he said 'i'm feeling so drained recently, I find it a strain sometimes to stand up from sitting even'

The man is a very fit 33 year old, he went jogging twice this last week and has been roofing all the other days, he doesn't know he's born does he 😆

Magpiecomplex · 27/09/2020 12:19

FIL "you're eating for two now"... Don't be ridiculous, it's the size of a bean right now and if I eat another mouthful I WILL be sick and so would actually have eaten less. MIL never had morning sickness so they were both spectacularly unsympathetic about mine. Strangely enough when SIL was pregnant they were much more solicitous but those were the third and fourth grandchildren so they'd got the worst of it out on me first.