How did your partner react?

[LoveYouHoneybear]

Just that- how did your partner react when they found out you were pregnant? My DH (nearly 40 years old!) is still terrified and I'm nearly 11 weeks. We always talked about having kids one day but this was a huge surprise (we were not TTC). Is his reaction normal?! He's scaring me! Thanks a lot.

My DH was over the moon, I was over 40 and very half hearted about TTC, he was much keener than me and absolutely delighted.

We had been trying for while so when we found out, I expected him to be really excited but in the beginning he was a little speechless I think, and never really excited during the entire pregnancy- now our baby is his absolute world and I worried for nothing. But I do think everyone copes with things differently!

'Are you sure? No I don't think that's a line. I don't think so.'

Took about three days to believe me. I'm 31 weeks now and he's soppier than me when it comes to the baby and tears up if he's cuddling my bump and the baby kicks him in the head

Neither of us wanted children so when we found out I was pregnant I was devastated, I mean totally inconsolable broken hearted. I called him to tell him (through many many tears) and he said in a very relaxed and calm way ‘that’s ok, it’s fine, don’t be upset, it’s fine’
In the weeks that followed I was a wreck, torn between decisions I didn’t want to make. He was honestly wonderful. I couldn’t have asked for better.
I miscarried in the end and you would think I’d I’ve relieved... no I was just as devastated. I’m still really confused about the whole thing

My partner said he wanted me to have the baby but didn’t want to be involved and was leaving. We weren’t TTC but had been together for years. It took him about a week to come to terms with it, and he now seems very happy.

With our first child he was over the moon . I was visiting family overseas and called him at midnight his time to tell him. He was driving and nearly crashed 😬😂!

With baby number 2, we weren’t really trying and were gonna let it happen when it happens . The month I got pregnant we only had sex once 🙈 and it was on my period . We didn’t even consider the possibility of pregnancy. I was feeling off though and kept thinking I was coming down with Covid 🤦‍♀️ ( this was in March ). I missed my period but as I was still nursing my 11 month old they weren’t super regular anyway . But still, I had a weird nagging feeling I could be pregnant but didn’t tell anyone as I felt stupid for even considering it as I didn’t think it was possible . I took a test and it was positive ( I’m 33 weeks now ). I woke my husband up at 6am and said “ I don’t know how but we are pregnant “ and he was so confused and kept asking how 😂! I guess you really can get pregnant anytime of the month ! He was super excited after the shock of it wore off . To be fair , I was so confused and shocked too . We booked an early pregnancy scan just to confirm our dates which turned out to be correct !

Baby #1 we were trying for so he was happy..
Baby #2,3,4 I was trying for but he didn't want anymore so he wasn't particularly happy but he got over it haha x

We were TTC, but I think he was a bit shell shocked when it happened. He did the whole 'it's not a line, no, not a line' thing too. It took a really obvious dark test and a digital to convince him. I am now 35 weeks, he is very excited about the kid, but I can tell there is a bit of apprehension about what's to come (sleepless nights, labour itself etc). He is very protective of the bump, but I guess the main bonding will happen once the baby is out.

Just very pragmatic both times. “Right ok, good to know”
Very underwhelming.
He’s a brilliant dad, but isn’t so bothered about the pregnancy part! x

@BeMorePacific this is my partner! This is our third and when he found out I got the usual 'Well done darling, good to know' then back to whatever task he was performing 😆

He's a brilliant and hands on dad and a bit of a domestic goddess really too, but the pregnancy part he is completely disinterested in

He was ecstatic. He loves children and always wanted a big family. As do I. We are currently expecting our 5th baby.... God is great

DC1 - “Hardly surprising though”.
DC2 - “Why are you home before me? Where is DS? What’s happened? You’re pregnant aren’t you?”.

The first time, I made a bit of a thing of it and wrapped a dummy up to give him, and he was over the moon! That pregnancy ended in an early miscarriage unfortunately. The second time round, only a few weeks later, I got up, did the test, went back to bed and told him, and then we both just rolled over and went back to sleep.

He told me he hasn't wanted to let himself get too excited in case things don't turn out well. I can understand that. He perked up a bit after seeing the heartbeat the other day (early 6w scan as I was having a bit of pain).

He went white as a sheet (I always thought that was just an expression, but he did). He then went on to say that he'd arrange the abortion. Made me go to Marie Stopes who wanted me to travel 30 miles, so I made that the excuse. Then took me to another clinic who arranged it for Christmas Eve. He was with his other DC so I didn't go. He was furious. I had a beautiful baby. He left me.

@perfumeistooexpensive you had a lucky escape there, what a horrible man

@BeMorePacific yeah this is my DH too - a wonderful dad to our DC1, but pregnancy doesn’t really seem to click for him. It’s only when the child is in his arms that he really gets it!!

Have to say, we both did a hypnobirthing course together and he was amazing for my labour as a result. So I recommend that to all newly pregnant mums to be x

My pregnancy was a big shock. I was 44.5, poor gynae history, had been told I couldn't have a family. My partner was 10 years older.

I told him, there was a very long silence and I was just thinking of being a single mum at 45 when he said "OK. That's a surprise, but OK."

"Right. Crikey. Fantastic!" We talked for 30 minutes or so then (because it was a Saturday) went our separate ways in the house to do cleaning/admin/lifework.
About 20 minutes after that I walked into the kitchen to see him dancing.
D'awww

We were in the "just let's see what happens" phase of ttc. I had taken the test just before he was due home from work.
I showed him the test and said "we've successfully merged our dna". He replied with "that's a scary thought"

We hmmed and haaed about trying to convince one night bit of a drunken wobble but he said feck it if it happens it happens 2weeks later showed him the test and he goes guess it too late to pull out now lol. Now an amazing dad to our 5month old who has daddy completely wrapped round his finger

@Ragwort

My DH was over the moon, I was over 40 and very half hearted about TTC, he was much keener than me and absolutely delighted.

Pretty much this. Certainly way keener than I was, though we were both gobsmacked to conceive the first month, when we expected it to take forever, if it happened at all.

Wednesday, me: I still haven't come on (4 days late) I've got pre period pains and I'm exhausted.

Him: Why don't you come over, 30 min drive and we'll go buy a test....

Me: No, you go buy a test and come to me.

Him: well I'm out right now.... 😒

Thursday, him: you okay?

Me: I'm sick of feeling sick and I'm exhausted and you're not helping blah blah blah (whilst picking up a test)

Positive test.

Ring him at work, Will you be angry with me? No. I'm pregnant. Oh. Right, well I'm in a meeting, I'll call you later 🙄

He was an absolute arsehole to me to begin with. Then we had a private scan at 17 weeks and he changed full circle and can't do enough for me and bump. I'm now 36 weeks and he tells everyone and anyone, extremely proudly, that he's having a daughter ☺️

Mine was extremely happy. We'd been trying for 4 months (tbh I wasn't sure how long it would take or how long was average, if there even is an average), we were both so happy as it was what we both wanted.

He was at work when I took the test (wanted to do it first thing in the morning). When it read 'positive, 2-3 weeks' I could not believe it. I text him and said there's something I need to tell you. He guessed from the text, we spoke on the phone when he got chance. He then had to try and concentrate at work and I wandered round in a daze all day.

When he came home we did the other test (was a pack of 2 anyway). For no other reason than we wanted to do a test when we were together, so we did and the result was the same.

I was a student at the time. It was the day before I was going home for the Christmas holidays (my uni city was 250 miles from where I grew up, so not close enough to still meet up or see each other until after Christmas itself). So we found out we were having a baby, then the next day I went home for Christmas, and we didn't talk about it properly until after the new year. Nor did we tell anyone about it. Felt like the longest time ever

Delighted of course, and I think like me a bit surprised that it has happened so soon after we started - we sort of assumed TTC would take at least 6 months

Mine is not happy!
We’ve been together a long time and always talked about children in the future. We were planning (roughly, if possible) for spring 2022 - except surprise ..spring 2021 it will be.
Apparently I’ve ‘trapped’ him !

Very early days but hopefully he calms down and gets excited !

@JeanieInABottle

Mine is not happy! We’ve been together a long time and always talked about children in the future. We were planning (roughly, if possible) for spring 2022 - except surprise ..spring 2021 it will be. Apparently I’ve ‘trapped’ him !

Very early days but hopefully he calms down and gets excited !

Jeanie, I'm in the same boat unfortunately. Glad to know I'm not alone... hope they shape the fuck up! x