How long did you wait after a mmc to ttc, & how long did it take?

[Sansa87]

Hi, I’m not quite sure where this post goes, but I’m driving myself crazy getting lost on google.

I had surgical management for a mmc on Monday. I was 10 weeks, but bubba stopped growing at 6 weeks.

I’m 33 years old and could not believe we fell pregnant on the first cycle, & my first pregnancy at all.

We want to try again, & emotionally i am okay waiting for first ovulation. However I can find any solid scientific evidence for or against doing this.

Doctors advise waiting either purely because of dating issues (we’d use opk’s so would have a rough idea) or because there is more chance of another mc if you haven’t let the lining build up?

Have any of you wonderful ladies sadly experienced this, & gone on to get your rainbow baby? Did you wait for the first period?

I just want my baby ❤️

I lost a daughter at 22 weeks, cause unknown. The OB/Gyn who delivered her came to my room the day I was being released and told me that the best way to overcome the grief was to try for another baby straight away. I lost her on the 1st of February, in late April I was pregnant and had normal pregnancy and my son will go to Uni next year.

Then I lost another baby, a boy this time, at 16 weeks, this time I was told to wait as they wanted to do some genetic investigation, but even with the waiting time, I got pregnant quite quickly, thinking about the words of the Ob-gyn (who had had 7 children herself and 2 MMC). I lost him on the 5th of July and had a positive pregnancy test on the 24 of October.
Again perfect pregnancy and my daughter is now a gorgeous teenager, strong willed and driving my husband mad with her political arguments.

I lost my first in France, so the advice might differ from the one you get in UK. In France, Ob-gyn follow pregnancies and deliver babies, and I trust their medical expertise.
Both my devastating MMCs were followed by healthy live births. IF you feel like it, lit the candles, close the curtains, and enjoy trying.

Wishing you all the best

I had mcs at 6 weeks, 5 weeks, then a mmc at 8 weeks. I then used a contraceptive device called Persona (probably doesn't exist any more) and only dtd on the green days. (You aren't really supposed to use Persona immediately following a mc) but got pregnant anyway. Had dd1 now 16 years old, then dd2 now 13 years old. Sorry about your mc

Sorry you’re going through this.
I and two of my close friends have all got pregnant first cycle post miscarriage (before a period) with no complications. I looked into it pretty extensively and there’s no evidence at all that you have to wait. There’s also no scientific evidence that you’re more fertile the first cycle but it definitely seems like there might be something to the old wives’ tales! If you’re feeling emotionally ready then go for it.
Couple of things - wait until you’ve stopped bleeding; and take a pregnancy test to make sure it’s negative before you try (would aim to do that maybe around 2 weeks post op if feeling good to go otherwise). You’ll save yourself a lot of confusion and heartache that way. In theory you could ovulate as soon as about 2 weeks post miscarriage but it could be a few weeks longer, up to 8 weeks later for your first period is totally normal.
In saying all that - try not to put too much pressure on yourself, this is a tricky time to get through and the weeks can just feel like they drag and drag. Best of luck.

I am sorry to hear your story, I went through something very similar a year ago. Fell pregnant on my first cycle (I’m 31 y/o) but sadly it ended up in a missed miscarriage, I found out at my 12 week scan that the baby stopped growing at 10 weeks, it was absolutely heartbreaking and unexpected.. I just wanted my baby back immediately
I had a D&C a couple of days after finding out, and bled for around 10 days.
They told me to wait for 2 cycles, but like you, I didn’t want to wait, I needed to feel pregnant again.. but decided to wait till at least I got my period and made sure that I got a negative pregnancy test before starting again, just in case there was retained tissue and that would complicate a future pregnancy.
Those were the most anxious months of my life, trying to conceive while dwelling for the baby was just so hard.. but I am still happy I did it, for me falling pregnant again was the only thing that would help me heal.. I felt pregnant again at my 2nd cycle and I am now 36 weeks expecting a healthy baby. I have had a very straightforward pregnancy, very anxious at the start, but feeling so lucky..I hope it all works out for you too! Take care of yourself and be patient, your little one will arrive

My story is very similar to @Bubblesbebe. Pregnant first cycle but MMC at 10 weeks. Had surgical management and decided to wait until after first period to try again. Had the surgery in August and was pregnant again in November.
I did feel like the new pregnancy help to heal me, but at the same time it made the first trimester feel really really long as there was no break between mmc and pregnancy.
My advise would be to try and give your mind and body a little break. Try and book a few nice things in to do with your partner (not easy at the moment I know) and take the pressure off ttc for a little while. I think it is important.

It's not just dating issues why doctors say to wait at least one period and it's very misleading - you need at least a month for your lining to recover especially if you were 6+ along when you miscarried. Miscarriages can also cause fluid build up in your tubes which are toxic to another pregnancy and also cause miscarriage. I ignored all the advice and didn't wait and had another miscarriage straight after then didn't wait again and ended up with a ruptured ectopic nearly died and lost my tube.....

Sorry that you are going through this . I started ttc after I stopped bleeding after surgical management. In retrospect, I should have waited for my first period as I put myself through so much stress in the immediate aftermath and it took 6 weeks to arrive anyway. I fell pregnant 8 months after my surgery and I'm now 33+3 with my rainbow 🌈.

Thankyou everyone. I wish there was a manual on all of this.

I had a mmc but had had some bleeding beforehand, so had two scans where there was still a heartbeat then a scan where it had stopped. My bleeding after surgical management went on longer than expected, a few weeks I think, and looking back between the bleeding while I was still pregnant and the bleeding after I was really run down and anaemic.

I think I had researched and decided I could start without waiting for a period but after all the bleeding I decided to wait, in the end it took nine more cycles before I conceived and I think for the first few months I was really run down from the miscarriage and needed to build myself up again.

Had a very straightforward pregnancy and have a wonderful crazy toddler now, but those months in between were stressful. Whatever you decide I'd recommend focusing on self care not just around ttc, I was so focused on getting pregnant again I think I missed how run down and stressed I was, which ironically I think was a factor in it taking a bit longer to conceive again.

It's hard OP, but so many people I know have miscarried and it generally is just bad luck, but you still need to give yourself time to recover from it and heal.

The advice is generally to wait one full cycle and ensure you’ve have a negative pregnancy in between. I cared for a woman recently who had a positive test 5 weeks after a miscarriage, thought it was a new pregnancy and when she came for scan it turned out there was retained tissue from the previous pregnancy causing the positive result, it was devastating for her. For that reason alone to save confusion I would wait until you’ve had a period and then a negative test after it before you try again. Good luck x

Hi, I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage last week and have surgical procedure tomorrow. I opted for the procedure as no sign of miscarriage coming itself and I didn't want to take tablets and be scanned again....took 3 scans to confirm miscarriage. I also have a 2 year old so didn't want to be bleeding etc if I didn't need to be.
I, like you just want my family to be complete and want to give my son a brother or sister. I've talked myself round in circles about when to try again and read someone's post who left it up to nature which I loved as if you are ovulating and having sex but not thinking about it maybe that's good way to get back to some form of normality but then I read the first period is different to normal so think I'm now going to wait and hope that AF arrives sooner rather than later! Good luck in your journey xxx

@GillyD83 good luck to you, too.

I’m still bleeding a week on, but feeling good otherwise. I’m glad that I ended up having surgery, although I tried the medical management I feel lucky that failed. It was obviously drawn out, but the surgery didn’t feel traumatic at all.

I’m thinking as long as I definitely get a negative pg test, and only dtd when an opk test says so, it should be okay?

I think I have read all google has to offer now

@Sansa87 I'm exactly the same, have read that it's ok but an issue with dates confirmation. Because I had the missed miscarriage where then it was first thought my dates were out I'm not sure I want to guess for 12 weeks how many weeks I am but then I think fuck it! Let's put it down to nature and start to dtd once the bleeding stops and we feel ready, what's stopping us. We've been together for 16 years and only ever used contraception when I've been on pill, not sure I want to go back to condoms...it's yet another mind fuck!!

@GillyD83 exactly! We fell pregnant on our first try, so I’m not convinced that it will be as easy next time. Plus I’m 33, I don’t want to put effort into not feeling pregnant. Ten years ago maybe, but I dont want to feel like a teenager buying condoms.

@Sansa87 I'm 37 and had first baby at 35 with no complications so feel like the rug has just been ripped from under me. I flit between getting the bleeding out the way, negative pregnancy test and testing for ovulation and trying and just throwing caution to the wind and one negative tests just start enjoying being with my husband again, doing no tests, no pressure and just seeing what happens! It's driving me crazy! Have started looking and planning healthy diet and hoping to get back into exercise again after this week is out the way! It's hard for it not to consume you though isn't it! X

So sorry, OP. I hope you've got lots of support around you.

I had a MMC last July, they advised me to wait one cycle due to dating reasons. I didn't wait but I didn't fall pregnant again until January this year, am now 33 weeks.

Lots of love

@GillyD83 my doctors still have me signed off so I’ve been meal prepping today, & we are going super healthy to try and help us conceive again.

Oh doesn’t want to wait to try again, & neither do I. I just can’t do it if the risks of miscarriage are even a little bit higher.

@espressoontap congrats on your pregnancy ❤️

@Sansa87 it doesn't seem like the risks are higher, just be careful to know your dates as much as you can as it's a horrible process going when you think you are say 8 weeks and measure 6 cause it's a long wait to make sure your baby is developing as it should etc. Before the missed miscarriage was confirmed I tortured myself on this, cause my cycles are 36 so told myself dates must have been out. My OH doesn't want to talk about trying again until we are through the other end of the process which is probably right, I don't know how I'll feel after MVA tomorrow xxx

@GillyD83 I’m thinking I wouldn’t get two false negatives, so as long as I get two, and use the opk’s I should be pretty clear with the dates.

At least that’s what I’m hoping.

This was my first pregnancy, and although I was early, I bonded so much with that baby, & I feel quite empty. I wasn’t sure if emotionally I’d be ready to try so soon, but yup, it’s all I want to do.

@Sansa87 I wish you all the luck in the world! I've got our prenatal his and hers vitamins on order and started looking at foods to add to diet. Got my ginger tea and iron tablets etc to take from after this process. Hopefully we will both get some positive news in next few months xxx

I got my BFN today. It was obviously upsetting, but also such a relief.

Any advice on when I should be looking to ovulate now? I’m 9 days post surgery xx

Hey - that’s good progress :) could in theory ovulate any time from now. Be aware that OPKs sometimes don’t work that well the first cycle or two as your hormones all settle down - and be aware of the emotional impact of recent events esp when you’re in (or think you’re in) your two week wait - it can be a really messed up cycle where you may feel like you have lots of pregnancy symptoms and then get your period anyway! Good luck

I miscarried at about 10 weeks, and then got pregnant again first try when I next ovulated. That one never really got going and I spotted on and off for weeks before losing that one too. Next time I waited one full cycle/period etc and then tried again. I felt much more back to normal and recovered, fell first try again (it took about 6 months with my first child) and went on to have my daughter.

Missed miscarriage in the December followed by surgery, pregnant again in the March. Was told by the surgeon the only reason to wait for period to return was to be able to date properly. All the best. xxx

I had a miscarriage at 20wks, I couldn't start trying again that quickly as emotionally I was a wreck, it took me a while to get my head in the right place. We got pregnant again 8 months afterwards (it took a while) and I had a beautiful boy (apparently I only carry my babies for 36wks as both came then)
I was a so anxious until he was born that something would go wrong - my 20wk scan was nerve wrecking.
However no problems at all with him, and he's now a rather cheeky 4yo.