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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

I smoke. I'm Pregnant, I need to stop. I need to know what damage I have already done.

167 replies

needtostop · 15/09/2007 17:40

I am 24 weeks pregnant.

I used to smoke 15 - 20 a day.

I'm now smoking between 2 and 8 a day.

I have had a few days where I have smoked as many as 10-12.

I need to know how much damage I might have done to the baby?

Could I have already of made him ill.

Ive just been in so much denial but really really want to stop.

Can I use patches?

If I stop now could I turn things around or is it too late?

OP posts:
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goingfor3 · 16/09/2007 09:22

You can do it if you really want to. You said you are carrying a boy, smoking can cause infertility in boys. Something that will affect your children as they grow older is that parents won't allow their children to visit after school etc as they don't want thier children to be subjected to smoke. You have to be strong for all of you.

edam · 16/09/2007 09:24

Yes, you can do it. There's some stuff you can buy, like the nail biting liquid, to put on your mouth (I think) that makes fags taste horrid. Or spray in your mouth or something. Worth a try. Ask your pharmacist.

morningpaper · 16/09/2007 09:25

can you tell yourself it is just temporary, until he is born, rather than never-ever again?

It might be easier than This-Is-My-Last-Fag?

Original poster
needtostop · 16/09/2007 09:43

Morningpaper - good idea but I REALLY want this to be it - I breastfed my daughter for 6 months and never smoked during that time, it was only a massive marital bust up that got me back on them.

I have proved that I have done it before, if I can do it again this time despite finding it so much harder this time.

Ive just had to go and wash my hands beause they stank - I must smell like this all the time? Its FOUL

Does everyone mind if I use this thread as a quitting diary? I hope that isnt too self absorbed?

OP posts:
lornaloo · 16/09/2007 10:05

I think that would be a really good idea. If you read the book you will stop. There are 2 there's 'the easy way to stop smoking' which is the one I read and there's 'the only way to stop smoking' my Mum read that one, I think its longer.
The thing with the book is you have to carry on smoking whilst you read it, this is beacause the book wants to focus on getting rid of the mental addiction you have first and then at the end of the book he talks you through your last cig. But if you read the book you will probably stop for good so I think its the best way to go. Good Luck.

tyaca · 16/09/2007 10:52

why i like this forum. see below:

so good to hear so many supportive and non-judgemental responses.

needtostop. you are v brave just to post. its such a taboo. i am 17wks and finding it so hard. i used to ''misbehave'' a lot in other ways, all of which i quit immediatley on getting pregnant. some such as drink, were v v hard (no sleep!) but nothing is harder than smoking. i wouldn't mind, but its not even fun

two weeks ago, i went to funeral of a friend in his early thirties, died of lung cancer leaving two small children behind.

sometimes i find it hard to connect with the abstract idea of harming a bump i can barely see - but find it a lot easier to relate to the horror of leaving dh and my future dd/ds earlier than should

pls pls don't beat yourself up. you not a bad person. good luck. i'm off to hypnotherapist next week - will post if that works.

xx

Ambi · 16/09/2007 11:29

better Allan Carr book

I'll be amazed if that link works, I can never get them to work, however it's a ahort book of Allan Carr, it's very good and IMO cuts out all the personal blah blah blah from the bigger books, it's only £4, worth a shot. It's really good for when you get cravings, to glance over it and confirm it's all in your mind. Hope it works for you needtostop, I struggled my ass off quitting during this pregnancy, very ashamed I took some months, but the guilt free feeling is worth it. Plus i think there's a quit smoking forum under health, those ladies will hold your hand through it and not berate you for being honest. Good luck chick,

Ambi · 16/09/2007 11:29

hurrah the link bloody worked

ninedragons · 16/09/2007 11:47

Good luck with it. Please do speak to your midwife or GP. Cortisol doesn't do the foetus any good either, so please don't get so wound up about it you end up loathing yourself.

Nobody is going to tell you smoking while pregnant is a fantastic idea, but the number of happy, perfectly healthy, intelligent friends I have whose mothers smoked while they were in utero suggests it's not automatically a complete disaster.

It's not too late to stop, but please get sympathetic professional help so you're not caught up in this cycle of shame and revulsion.

Original poster
needtostop · 16/09/2007 11:52

That book looks great Ambi - will borders stock it do you think?

I would love to get it read quickly, now Im feeling ready dont want to spend weeks trying to get through the bigger allan carr book whilst still smoking.

And if you dont mind me asking, how many weeks were you when you managed to stop ? (congratulations and well done by the way )

OP posts:
lornaloo · 16/09/2007 12:00

That book lookes good Ambi especially if its shorter.
Needtostop if you read the book whenever you can you should have it read in no time.

sunshinegirl · 16/09/2007 12:45

Haven't read that little book but have seem it in the shops, thought it was rather brief, my only worry would be that it doesn't contain enough of the info in detail enough IYSWIM, I thought that was more of a book to refer back to. Correct me if I'm wrong of course!!

Good idea to make this a quitting diary. As Allen Carr points out even the phrase "giving up" implies that you will be losing out on something.

Good luck x

sunshinegirl · 16/09/2007 12:48

oh and it really won't take you weeks to read easyway, you could have it read in a day or 2 (depending on your schedule of course!) but once I started it I couldn't wait to finish it and become a non smoker!

lornaloo · 16/09/2007 12:53

Same here sinshine once I started it I couldn't put it down. It really interesting. i think I finished it in 3 days.

Original poster
needtostop · 16/09/2007 17:58

Hi girls

Im now in possession of a quit box by allan carr - the little book and a set of cards with lots of info on.

Hope I havent made a mistake not getting the full one.

Im starting to feel the message is going in already, only just had another one after my ciggy this morning and even that was a sort of, hmmmm Ill have one I suppose whilst I digest all this information and I didnt enjoy it at all.

Fingers crossed for me.

OP posts:
MitfordSisters · 16/09/2007 18:20

hello

i quit last year and i was a serious addict - never without one. whyquit.com is the best resource i found. i did the Alan Carr - trogged all the way to Raynes Park for it but they used lots of metaphors about golfing and the man who delivered it wasn't very sympathetic - managed 2 weeks!

fags give your blood sugars a boost every time you have one - it's like having a snack. so in giving up, i had strategic juices and yogurts and things to compensate for those energy dips. Also, I slept a great deal and felt like i had flu for 3 days - but you excrete all the nicotine in 3 days. this is why i think any type of nicotine replacement is incomprehensible - because you are not weaning yourself off what is the highly addictive substance - nicotine.

whyquit.com - can't recommend it enough. and ignore all the people in glasshouses.

sunshinegirl · 16/09/2007 19:46

NTS, glad you managed to get the Allen Carr stuff today, I'm sure what you have will cover what's in the book. It all just makes so much sense when you read it.

Have everything crossed for you, not that I think you will need it now!

Thinking of you, please keep us posted

emj23 · 16/09/2007 20:10

It took me several lapses before I managed to give up altogether, but you can do it. Good luck and best wishes to you.

winestein · 16/09/2007 20:30

That sounds you went on the course though Mitford - I can't recall reading about golfing and the man who delivered.

Allen Carr, Allen Carr, Allen Carr.... Allen Carr, Allen Carr, Allen Ca-arr!

StealthPolarBear · 16/09/2007 20:41

sorry if this has already been mentioned but your pct should be able to put you in touch with a smoking cessation advisor. Some specialise in pregnancy.

MitfordSisters · 16/09/2007 20:44

It was a course weinstein - i don't think there's golf in the book...

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 16/09/2007 20:53

Smoking in pregnancy can cause a stillbirth.

I had a stillbirth two years ago. I am not a smoker and never found out why it happened.

One day your baby is moving around inside you and you are taking everything for granted that all is well. In your case lighting up a fag and making excuses for it. Next minute the baby stops moving. You think no, it cant be, not me.But it is. You drive to the hospital pressing on your tummy, willing it to move but the scan reveals a motionless baby.Then you have to deliver the baby.All that pushing and pain for nothing. A limp dead baby that will never laugh or cry.Then when you should be placing it in a lovely new crib or moses basket, your placing it in a coffin.

Hope this shocks you.

and

mumzyof2 · 16/09/2007 20:56

Oh God, CP, I am so sorry for what happened. That must have been such a terrible time for you.

CHOCOLATEPEANUT · 16/09/2007 20:58

Yes it was.

I am pg again (29 weeks)

I have never smoked,never really got why people do.But felt that sharing my story might hit a nerve.

I hope it does. I would not want anyone to go through this.

callmeovercautious · 16/09/2007 20:59

Hope you are still reading!

I smoked a bit too and the following happened - Low lying placenta - which luckily moved up and I had no problems at Birth. Low Fluids so was monitored more. DD was only average weight when actually she is more of an above average size naturally now she is a year.

I did not smoke much but did right up until I found out I was pg (5 weeks) then stopped and started throughout pg. Never very much but I never really kicked it completely. I did not ask for help as I was embarrassed that I was being so wek willed. Even now I see a pg woman smoking and think "disgusting" then remember myself

It is SO SO hard. Please ask for help. I was very lucky to have a healthy DD at the end but I know I was very stupid and for an educated person quite ignorant as I ignored the leaflets - I could not bring myself to read them.

I could give lots of excuses for why I carried on but that is typical addict behaviour and you know every line I could come up with.

I have not name changed for this as I like to be honest on here, if it gets me flamed then I actually deserve it.

I just wanted you to know that You are not alone and if you want to talk then please give me a shout.