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Original poster

Would you be mad if a sibling announced their pregnancy during a family member's funeral ?

48 replies

Narymoam · 05/04/2020 14:52

Imagine if your mother always wanted to be a grandmother but passed away. Would it be inapropriate to announce your pregnancy during her funeral ? There would be about 30 people including young siblings aged 10 , 14 and 17 and your father. Could it hurt any of them ?

OP posts:
OnlyFoolsnMothers · 05/04/2020 14:53

I wouldn’t be mad....seems an odd thing to do though.

lockdownpregnancy · 05/04/2020 14:56

Well first of all I'm terribly sorry for your loss 😢
My personal opinion would be not to announce at the funeral. It's your moms day and a time to celebrate her life and remember her.
I wouldn't say it would be inappropriate but timing wise, not so much.
Others at the funeral may not see it that way and you may not get the reaction you are hoping for.
Good luck with whatever decision you decide to make

HollowTalk · 05/04/2020 14:57

I would think it was very inappropriate. It's the mother's day, not the pregnant daughter's day.

iCorona · 05/04/2020 15:00

I would think it’s not the right time. If there is a relative who is very upset and you know the news will be a comfort to them then perhaps tell them 1-1. Announcing it seems like it take the focus away from the relative who has passed.

ParkheadParadise · 05/04/2020 15:01

I cant imagine doing it.
Sounds weird to even think about it.

Frariedeamin · 05/04/2020 15:04

Does the sibling have a habit of attention seeking? I was so overwhelmed at my mums funeral this would have tipped me completely over the edge.

thefourgp · 05/04/2020 15:05

You don’t announce or tell anyone big personal news at weddings or funerals. It’s selfish. The day is all about the deceased or wedding couple and not you. Wouldn’t you prefer to announce it on a happier day? It should be a joyful announcement, not one amidst the grief at a funeral.

EmAndes · 05/04/2020 15:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Christmastree43 · 05/04/2020 15:06

I would also go with no, let your family members grieve and remember your mum, especially at a time like this.

I would feel like you had taken away my mum's day and made it about you to be honest

LittleLittleLittle · 05/04/2020 15:07

I wouldn't particularly due to the young age of some of the mourners.

If they were all much older then maybe fair enough.

Christmastree43 · 05/04/2020 15:07

Also people would feel like they would have to force smiles and happiness. Definitely do it after, let you and your little one create your own new beginning and new memories with the family, don't step on your mums

OnlyJudyCanJudgeMe · 05/04/2020 15:10

If that’s a UK funeral there won’t be all those people there.
Depending on how far along the pregnancy is, maybe the minister could put it in his speech about the family members to be named. Our (as then) unborn daughter was mentioned in my FIL’s funeral, but I was 26/27 weeks by then.

Cissyandflora · 05/04/2020 15:13

It would be really inappropriate and the type of thing to fuel resentment for years to come. It’s not about pregnant daughter. Don’t do it.

PotteringAlong · 05/04/2020 15:15
  1. there won’t be 30 people there
  2. at the minute and it’s the only time you will see people face to face then I think taking your sibling / dad to one side at the end and telling them is fine.
  3. don’t announce it. It doesn’t need to be announced
Justtobeclear · 05/04/2020 15:15

My sister did this at my granddad's funeral. She said it was to "cheer everyone up." I'd just had my first ivf failure and she couldn't understand why I wasn't fawning over her. Everyone felt it was unnecessary and attention seeking. Our relationship never really recovered.

TheArchSorcererofContwaraburg · 05/04/2020 15:17

Very inappropriate.

Ohyesiam · 05/04/2020 15:19

I wouldn’t be mad, but if think the announcer was thick skinned and not very perceptive.
I know that sounds very judgemental, and they’d never know I thought that, but my opinion of them would go down.

Elieza · 05/04/2020 15:20

What country are you in that allows 30 people at a funeral?

TheMandalorian · 05/04/2020 15:21

Just no. Completely inappropriate and attention seeking. Cop on to yourself.

Thescrewinthetuna · 05/04/2020 15:22

So inappropriate

Didntwanttochangemyname · 05/04/2020 15:24

Totally inappropriate, and attention seeking. Also intreaged to know where you are that allows 30 people together at once...

karala · 05/04/2020 15:24

I think that depending on how it is done - quietly without fuss - then it would bring some joy to the day. I would be delighted if a close family member was having a baby and at the moment we should be celebrating life all the more. Let's face it, at the moment, there will only be close family at the funeral.

Hotpinkangel19 · 05/04/2020 15:24

My mum died, she never knew about the baby I was pregnant with. Only myself and my husband did. At her funeral the last thing i ever thought of was to announce my pregnancy.

teaandtantrums90 · 05/04/2020 15:26

I would have been fuming if one of my siblings announced a pregnancy at my moms funeral. It was an emotional day just about her no one else x

Nixen · 05/04/2020 15:26

Tacky

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