Travelling from UK to France with a 1 month old baby??

[IslayBrigid]

Hi everyone
Sadly due to this pandemic one of my best friends has postponed her wedding, which means she is getting married on 10 October (all going to plan). Our first baby is due end Aug/beginning September. I guess latest she could come is 15 September as would probably induce at 42 weeks. So there is a chance she will be only 3.5 weeks old when the wedding happens, but she could also be 4 or 5 weeks old or even 6 weeks.
What do you think - is this incredibly unrealistic? Has anyone travelled with a baby that is only one month or under? I really really don't want to miss my friend's wedding, she is very important to me, and I am a bridesmaid. I would be so sad to miss it.
I will (all going to plan) be breastfeeding baby and having a vaginal birth... not sure if that might make it easier...
Please tell me your thoughts

We’re considering how soon we can travel too. I can’t comment on how easy it’ll be with a baby as it’s our first but have you considered the passport? It’s currently 3 weeks normal service for a first passport or 1 week expedited. You’ll need the birth certificate first too. Doable but something to consider.

Probably a bit unrealistic, I'm afraid.

We went to a wedding locally when our baby was 5 and a half weeks old (would have been 8 weeks old if born on her due date). That was about the earliest I could do it. I left early and my partner came back in a taxi later.

You just don't know, unfortunately. I had a forceps delivery and severe anaemia from a big bleed. My friend's baby has been in the NICU (born at term). For other people it would be ok, but I would say a long journey would be uncomfortable for most people at 6 weeks. At 3 weeks, you'll likely still be bleeding yourself, feeding round the clock, and very tired.

To put it in perspective, I only managed to walk to the park 10 minutes away when the baby was 2 weeks old.

(As in, that was the first time I left the house other than for medical appointments. It was stressful and uncomfortable!)

I could have done it with DS2 and 3 physically but not DS1. I could have done it mentally with DS1 and 2 but not DS3. All 3 breastfed, all 3 vaginally born. This is a how long is a piece of string thing.

More importantly, the chances of you getting a birth certificate and a passport in the first 3.5 weeks of your child’s life is virtually non-existant.

If you're not driving, it will probably be doable. (Driving would mean making an ungodly number of stops with such a young baby)

I did uni exams 8hrs after DD1 was born, was running around softplay 12hrs after DD2, and school run with

Weirdly only half of that posted...

School run with

Oh dear Lord what a train wreck 🤦‍♀️ apologies for the technical difficulties... it's doable if you have a straightforward birth

As others have said, you'll struggle to get the birth certificate and passport within such a small time period. In my borough there's a 4 week wait for registering births so the hospital stressed that we should book an appointment as soon as we got home, and this was obviously before the Corona virus implications. When we applied for his passport it took about 10 days but I suppose you could do that using a priority service.

Physically, I could have done what you're proposing as I had a very good birth and was going on buses etc alone with my baby by the second week. However be prepared that if you do go to this wedding your entire time will be spent focusing on the baby as at that age it might only want to sleep on you, or won't sleep, or might be really sick and refluxy or you might get lucky and have a baby with no issues but even then, you'd be constantly changing nappies, outfits etc so you wouldn't be able to relax at all. Newborns also want feeding CONSTANTLY so chances are you would also need to feed during the wedding ceremony itself, as baby can't just wait until the service is over.

Thank you all for your advice! It sounds like it's just a really hard one to know... To be on safe side I should probably just plan not to go. I'll have a think and speak to my midwife as well. THANK YOU X

There's lots to think about - newborns can only be in a car seat for 30 minutes or so at a time so even getting to the airport might take a while, that's if you can get baby registered and passport in time. At 4 weeks pp with DS I was still bleeding, looked pregnant still and couldn't sit on uncomfortable chairs so it would have been a no from me, DS would have been fine though!

At 4 weeks pp with DS I was still bleeding, looked pregnant still and couldn't sit on uncomfortable chairs so it would have been a no from me

This was just like me.

I'm in exactly the same position and we're just going to have to wait until the last minute to see! I'll be getting a one hour flight, so I'm hoping it's do-able

My cousin has just had her baby and currently they are not registering any births (I guess busy registering deaths 🙁) so that will have a knock on delay for a long time I would expect, just thinking of passport x

I travelled with a baby that young and was able to get a passport as I applied with a name when I was pregnant. On the phone they said they can amend the date of birth when the baby was born.

While it was fine, I was exhausted and didn’t enjoy the trip. Didn’t hate the trip or anything, but didn’t exactly enjoy it!

But you don’t know. Your baby could be late and you could end up with a c section, in which case you won’t want to travel. I’d wait and see...

I had an emergency cesarean and would have been fine to travel at 4 weeks. It could go either way.

It is potentially do-able but I doubt you will feel up to it and it is so much pressure for you to cope with as a new mother. You will still be recovering from the birth. You will be absolutely exhausted at that point as the sleep deprivation will have started to bite. I couldn't have managed it, I'm sorry.

A friend travelled with a 3 week old to South Africa, which is a pretty long flight. But she did have a relatively non problematic pregnancy, birth and the baby was healthy. It's hard to bank on those though, so many factors to consider, I would wait and see personally.

We went to SIL wedding in the same Cory when DD1 was 3 weeks old... I think we could have gone further away if someone else had been in charge of the whole experience... At 6 weeks old we went from London to Orkney by car so journeys are possible with a newborn...

Just no.

You will have more important and pressing things to be doing. Don't put that pressure on yourself!

We had to turn down a wedding that was in this country and a 2 hour drive away. Baby was a month old.

We couldn't even get an appointment to register the birth until our baby was over six weeks. And you can't get a passport without a birth certificate. So I would think it's unlikely.

I had an emergency c section and still wouldn’t have been ready for travel at six weeks. And honestly.... I wouldn’t have wanted to!

Could you plan a celebration at a different time with your friend? Take the pressure off needing to try and travel so soon after having the baby.

Um do you realise we could all still be in some form of lockdown, or at least restrictions, then (maybe after having had a temporary lifting of restrictions earlier in the summer)? And that even if we’re not, the country and central processes like issuing birth certificates and passports are still probably going to be impacted by staff shortages due to deaths and self isolation? And I don’t know what state international travel will be in by then. I’d just concentrate on getting you and your baby safely through the next few months and birth tbh.
Sorry I don’t mean to sound harsh but I was surprised that only one PP had even mentioned Covid.

You might find this thread useful. Very similar circumstances although the replies obviously didn't factor in the added complication of covid and the knock on effects on international travel.

Honestly I don't think it's a go-er and trying to make all the arrangements in the present circumstances would just add feelings of stress and worry to an already intense time. Cut yourself some slack and tell your friend now that it's unlikely that you'll be able to attend. If you can pull something out of the bag in September or October then it'll be a nice surprise, not a disappointment if you can't be there.

If you can get the passport, then personally I'd say go :-)

I've had two planned sections, and was fine within the week, back going to social engagements etc, having friends round for dinner, meeting friends, going out for meals etc.

You'd need to check about travel insurance, especially if you have a section or a complicated birth, as some companies get funny about it before your 6 week check.

Yes you "might' still be leaking milk - that's what breast pads are for (and I still get leaky moments a year later, so you may as well get used to it early).

Yes, you "might" still have lochia. Mine stopped after a week or so, but I think it's often about 6 weeks with a vaginal birth. But given its just a long period the first couple of days might be heavier - it equally might not), then as long as you're sensible with clothing choice (no white ;-) ) and use pads, it's no barrier to going out.

In reality everyone is different, and everyone's experiences are different, and you know yourself better than we do. Some women barely leave the house for weeks. Some go out every day from very early on. Some of that is due to healing speed etc (though don't assume that vaginal = faster healing than c section), some of it dependant on people's personalities.

Personally, I'd go, and would plan to down few days sightseeing whilst there, but I can appreciate that it's not for everyone.