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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Having scan done alone

39 replies

Leahmorob · 27/03/2020 16:03

Hey guys

I'm absolutely devastated my husband won't be able to come our 12 week scan as the hospital are saying you have to go alone.

Can't stop crying and devastated for him too, has anyone else had this?

Any advice on how to stay positive would be amazing 😩

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

IDontLikeMondays88 · 27/03/2020 16:06

I think everyone due a scan is in the same boat just now.

Areallthenamestaken · 27/03/2020 16:11

It's shit, isn't it?

I have a scan next week and my husband won't be allowed in. I'm sad for him missing out but he has seen 3 scans already for this baby. I would be devastated if he had to miss our first scan so I can empathise.

It may be the same for everyone but it's still rubbish :(

fool11 · 27/03/2020 16:17

I can empathise..it's not great although i understand why they are doing it..maybe ask if you can take a short video on your phone after they've done all the measurements, we were allowed..good luck.

Nfblues · 27/03/2020 16:57

I had my anomaly scan today and was sent a text message yesterday saying partners weren’t allowed. We were both upset but we understand the situation and there’s no point stressing about it as everyone’s in the same boat. DH drove me and stayed in the car, my scan went well thankfully and as soon as I got out I called him to tell him everything was okay. I had paid for 2 pics but the sonographer was lovely and gave me 10 to share with him. Overall it was a positive experience and don’t let this situation ruin your pregnancy because it’s a lovely magical time xx

LH1987 · 27/03/2020 17:01

I had a scan yesterday and was informed when we arrived that my DH wouldn't be able to come in. It was a surprise but to be honest it was fine. The scan went as normal and I had a photo to show him afterwards. I get that you are sad but in 6 months you will have an actual baby he can look at any time he wants, also it be may be a different situation by the time you get to your 20 week scan :).

chica1 · 27/03/2020 17:04

I think it's a bit over reaction considering the circumstances.
. I did all three of my children's scans on my own as my husband could not have time off work. But it was fine, the world didn't end, he is an amazing dad and has the best relationship with the children. We all survived and really there are much more worrying things In the world at the moment like a covid positive mother having a o give birth

Zillerdy · 27/03/2020 17:04

Check if the hospital has good enough wifi or a decent 4g signal to Facetime or Sykpe during the scan and if they will allow this.

If not, ask if you can be on the speaker phone with your partner, so at least he can hear what is going.

@fool11 - great idea too.

Hope it goes well for you and all the other ladies in the same situation.

AwkwardPaws27 · 27/03/2020 17:11

I feel for people who are receiving bad news alone; when I miscarried, I needed my husband's support. If you go for a scan and it's a missed miscarriage or a molar pregnancy, I hope there is a system in place to contact partners.

Robs20 · 27/03/2020 17:13

I had a scan alone on wed. Consultant and midwife were both lovely. Good luck!

Jem9153 · 27/03/2020 18:55

I had to go to my 20 week scan alone yesterday, I was also upset as hospitals terrify me and my anxiety was through the roof because I’ve had a few issues, so was convinced the baby wasn’t okay. But I did it and it was fine!

It’s really sad he couldn’t be there but it is for the best given the situation, my hospital gave us our photos for free (we usually have to pay) and we got a few more than usual as well, my partner was buzzing to look at them all when I got back :)

We’re thinking of booking a private scan when this is all over if we can, just so he can have another look at the baby as I think it doesn’t feel as real for him til he sees the baby on a screen 😂

Hugs and I hope you feel better soon

cushioncovers · 27/03/2020 18:59

Our antenatal clinic is allowing healthy partners for FTCs, dating scans or first scans. No others.

peachypetite · 27/03/2020 19:00

It’s shit but it’s a pandemic. You do seem to be over reacting a little, you need to be strong. I’m newly pregnant and have already come to terms with the fact I’ll likely be going in alone. Husband will still come and wait in the car. I completely understand why they need to limit people. As others have said with the technology we have it’s not as bad. Chin up :)

Holly3 · 27/03/2020 19:15

I so feel for you OP! As I'm in the same situation our first scan is next Friday and my partner can't attend now - it's upsetting and we are more than entitled to feel sad & shit about the situation. Yes huge things are going on in the world but that doesn't mean our feelings aren't validated xx

kayleesmithy · 27/03/2020 19:16

It's just a scan. Hopefully he can come to the birth

ChipsAreLife · 27/03/2020 19:23

It's rubbish OP of course it is. And we will all be in the same boat. But I think crying constantly isn't healthy. The measures are to keep you and your baby, the other mums and babies and the staff as safe as possible.

LuckyC27 · 27/03/2020 20:40

I had my 20 week scan today alone and waiting room was full of other mums to be alone my husband drove and waited in the car park for me so I knew he wasn't far away, obviously it's not ideal but I do understand why they are doing it and the whole hospital was pretty empty. Fingers crossed measures like this will help and Luckily we had a private scan at 16 weeks due to heavy bleeding I had shortly after my 12 week scan so my husband got to see the baby then and find out gender. Maybe book a private scan if you can so you both can go?

caffeinefix · 27/03/2020 20:41

Had mine today. To be honest, my husband and I totally understood and were fine about it. I was anxious as I've had two losses before this pregnancy. It's just something you have to do, sadly.

LittleBrownBaby · 27/03/2020 20:46

I'm a little bit sad - but in the scheme of what is going on I guess it's fairly minor. Just hoping I won't be giving birth alone. Good luck with your scan.

TheArchSorcererofContwaraburg · 27/03/2020 20:58

It's a bit of a letdown but hardly devastating or cause to keen.

EBM20 · 27/03/2020 21:22

Had an emergency early pregnancy scan today, first pregnancy and had to go by myself.The nurses were lovely but the lady that scaned me had no sympathy, told me to stop crying or she will send me home without scaning me and I will have nothing to tell my partner. Honestly tramatised by the experience and I have to go back next week for another scan, so nervous for it knowing I have to go again, hoping it will be a different person scanning!

Thekindyoufindinasecondhand · 27/03/2020 21:28

Had my 20 week today and found out the gender....whilst husband waited in car outside.
Not ideal obviously but you just have to crack on and get on with it. Just focus on staying calm for your baby.
My sonographer was lovely but he unfortunately said no to any recording, gave me loads of free scan pics though. To get my mind off being alone I asked him to explain everything he was checking in detail which was fascinating (if you like that kind of thing!)
You'll be fine, we are all in the same boat

sel2223 · 27/03/2020 21:36

I had my anomaly scan yesterday and the waiting room was full of women in exactly the same position. The sonographer was lovely and really helped make me feel at ease.
It's not a situation any of us wants but i do think it's the right decision. They're trying to keep us all safe.

FoxtrotSkarloey · 27/03/2020 21:38

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ.

Em91 · 27/03/2020 21:39

The most important thing is your husband will be able to be there when you give birth which overall is the most important time, I know someone who works for the NHS and they updated me today with this information.
I have my 20 weeks scan next week and my partner can't come with me so I'll have to surprise him when I'm home to tell him if it's a boy or a girl.
The main thing is to get all of our babies through this virus in the safest way possible.

AlfieandAnnieRose · 27/03/2020 21:46

@EBM20 that is absolutely shocking 😮 please can you report that lady because she has no right to speak to anyone like that, especially someone in your position who was already feeling upset and scared. She should have some compassion! I’m sure if you told someone she would be reprimanded for that

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