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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

is sleeplessness before birth preparation?

30 replies

Amorino · 16/08/2007 22:23

Both my husband and I are finding it very hard to sleep at night. Me because I am getting up to pee every 10 minutes and can't get back to sleep but I don't why he can't (apart from me disturbing him!)? Is this our bodies' way of preparing us for the arrival of our baby and sleepness nights? We haven't been able to sleep for a week or so and our first baby is due on Saturday. Any thoughts?!

OP posts:
TOD · 16/08/2007 22:29

I THINK IT IS OUR BODIES WAY OF PREPARING US FOR THE BROKEN SLEEP AHEAD! I AM NOW 35 WEEKS AND NOT SLEEPING WELL AT ALL...FIRST TIME AROUND I WAS THE SAME.......IT SEEMS BETTER WHEN YOU ARE WAKING TO FEED A BABY THOUGH..THERES A PURPOSE FOR BEING AWAKE AND YOU CAN SETTLE BACK TO SLEEP TOO AFTERWARDS........ITS JUST ANNOYING AT THIS STAGE WHEN ALL YOU WANT IS A GOOD NIGHTS SLEEP!!!
THIS WEEK DH HAS MOVED OUT (ON MY INSISTANCE) TO THE SPARE ROOM AS I KNOW I WAS KEEPING HIM AWAKE AND ITS POINTLES US BOTH BEING TIRED AND GRUMPY!!!

Amorino · 16/08/2007 22:31

Isn't our body clever?! Altho' I would rather get as much sleep as possible now! We don't feel tired though (yet)- I am just worried we are going to burn ourselves out before the baby arrives!

OP posts:
TOD · 16/08/2007 22:35

MOTHER NATURE TAKES OVER AND YOU WILL COPE!!!! YOU WILL HAVE TO NAP WHEN THE BABY NAPS ESPECIALLY THE FIRST FEW WEEKS...OTHER WISE YOU WILL GET EXHAUSTED!!

designerbaby · 17/08/2007 11:54

Mother Nature's way or preparing?

Are you insane?

That's like saying the best way to prepare for starvation is to go on a crash diet, and the next person who says that tom me is going to be on the receiving end of a sleep-deprivation-induced punch in the face.

Are piles preparation for the pain of childbirth? No they're bloody not. They're just an unpleasant aspect of pregnancy which has no positive use whatsoever.

Is our body clever? Undoubtedly - it's making a whole new person.

But is sleep deprivation part of it's cleverness'? No. It's part of it trying to cope with the massive demands sudenly being made of it, and understandably not managing to keep everythng else ticking along quite as smoothly as it once did. It's not our body's fault - it's doing the best it can.

It's a f-ing ridiculous thing to say - clearly in an ideal world we would be building up our energy reserves now for when we need them during and post birth.

Just like in an ideal world we wouldn't have all the other rubbish side effects of pregnancy. But this isn't an ideal world, so we and our heroic bodies just battle on doing the best we can.

I really find though that ridiculous statements like that (usually made by people who have either never suffered with it, or have forgotten what it's like) REALLY don't help.

You're right Tod (but please turn off your caps lock - it looks like you're shouting!) post birth, we will cope, I'm sure, but that's not to say that a decent amount of sleep now wouldn't help.

I'm planning on trying to get the odd short nap in during the day when I'm on Mat leave to try and top-up the reduced amounts I'm getting at night...

However, I refuse to be all idealistic about the fact that I'm not sleeping. I'll get through it, but I'm not about to try and pretend it's a good thing.

Rant over...

DB
xx

Amorino · 17/08/2007 20:25

Is it really necessary to swear?! Talk about caps lock appearing like shouting - your response is far more aggressive. We are simply discussing possible reasons why we may not be able to sleep - and you are right, this is my first time - hence my enquiry!

OP posts:
MrsMar · 17/08/2007 20:48

I think designerbaby has just had a bad day Amorino, don't take too much offence. FWIW I think designerbaby is bang on the money. If it IS the body getting ready for motherhood, it's a pretty crummy way to do it. A MUCH better way would be to be able to sleep tons and suddenly have no sensitivity to pain from about a week before the baby's due til about two weeks afterwards! Oh that and a sudden lottery win should do the job!

TOD · 17/08/2007 22:13

Have turned off caps lock for fear of offending or deafening anyone!!!
And i have been there before (I have a 2 year old) and I am now 35 weeks plus so i know all too well about sleepless nights and coping with lack of sleep! Yes it would be ideal to get as much sleep as possible now but it doesnt work that way..........you need to destress a little designerbaby.

FlossALump · 17/08/2007 22:17

Perhaps DB's baby wasn't quite as designer as she might have hoped...

PurpleLostPrincess · 19/08/2007 14:45

I haven't slept for more than 2 or 3 hours in one go for months and months!!!!! Before, I would go from 10/11pm through to 6am and maybe get up once in the night for a wee. Now, if I do go for 2 or 3 hours, I'm chuffed to bits - then I'm up every half an hour for a wee. I'm in agony with SPD and heartburn and they nearly admitted me to the hospital last week so I could get a good nights sleep (not sure where the logic comes in there as it wouldn't have made much difference - I hate hospital beds!).

I just try and catch naps in the daytime now - I'm 35 weeks. It doesn't always work though what with the kids being on school holidays.

My DH has always been an insomniac but he seems to be sleeping more than me now!!

I don't think it's natures way of doing anything really, its just the hard work and difficulty of carrying a baby is taking its toll on our bodies. I keep telling myself it'll all be worth it in the end!!!

(word of warning - don't let the dr's give you sleeping tablets as they made me wet myself last time! ).

Did you know that challenge air catchphrase through the night? It's brill!!!

LilyLoo · 19/08/2007 14:53

Amorino congrats hope all goes well and at least you know you can manage on less slepp.
I unfortunately made a joke about it being mother nature preparing you and also got shot down in flames last week by db so it's not just you, she obviously has an isue with this subject.
Hope all goes well for you and yes i do konw what it's like i have a 5 and 2 year old and am 20 weeks pg.
I think it's porbably due to the excitement and stress but hey whatever it's all leading up to a fab but tiring time.

designerbaby · 20/08/2007 12:28

Yeah ? sorry Amorino ? wasn?t meaning to attack you, but I can see that it did turn into a bit of a rant... It?s just I haven?t had a decent night?s sleep in about 6 weeks now, and feel pretty rough as a result and lack patience with people who keep trying to insist it?s in some way a good thing when it patently isn?t...

I think being in fairly constant pain at night leading to no sleep leading to not really feeling able to cope with pain, plus pretty constant peeing throughout the night leads to a bit of a sense of humour failure about this particular topic...

A helpful soul (not preg. BTW) at the weekend spent a good ten minutes telling how great it was that our bodies were able to prepare themselves in this way and how amazing it was how little sleep we actually need... Before adding that she, of course, had always slept like a log.

You'll be relieved to know I didn't head-butt her...

Oh and my nickname isn?t anything to do with wanting/having a ?designer? baby ? more that I am a designer by profession (or at least I was when I slept and was therefore able to be a functioning member of society) who?s having a baby ? see? Although I?m sure that when she finally makes an appearance she will obviously be the most beautiful/perfect little thing imaginable... Aren?t they all?

Anyway, apologies to any I offended I will edit before I post in future and just KEEP SMILING in slightly maniacal fashion and only think about all the positives etc.

It?s just that 9 months is a BLOODY long time, isn?t it?

DB
xx

potoroo · 20/08/2007 13:04

I don't know whether it really is a preparation, or whether its just the massive strain that pregnancy puts on your body. I know that I can no longer roll over in my sleep so I am waking up regularly in pain.

However, once baby does arrive, your body does adjust your sleep cycle, including the REM part of it to cope with broken sleep. That is pretty amazing, but I don't know if it happens pre-birth

Hopeitwontbebig · 20/08/2007 14:00

TOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where have you been??? We haven't heard from you on the September antenatal thread since you went for your nuchal scan! I was worried about you when we didn't hear anything.

Come back to us

!

MrsMar · 20/08/2007 14:08

designerbaby, glad to hear you're feeling a little better and didn't head butt your well meaning but naive friend!! I'm so tired I can barely function today, I'm reading every post 20 times cos it's just not going in! I hope you manage to get some rest soon... I'm just off for 40 winks.... zzzzzzz

PurpleLostPrincess · 20/08/2007 16:05

Hope you managed to get a nice nap MrsMar - I just tried to doze off then my exhusband rang to talk about DD1's birthday next week, then my DH called wanting to chat - I feel worse now than I did before I tried to nap!!! I'm now snapping at the children the poor things! [pull myself together icon]

I've had a few well meaning people try and tell me that all this lack of sleep is a good thing too and I have to say I've struggled to agree with them!! .

The only thing that keeps me going whilst lying there in pain is the thought of the fact that come 5 or 6 weeks, I'll be up feeding this LO. I managed to get my DC's to sleep through by 4 weeks old, so I'm hoping I can achieve it again this time!!!

iliketosleep · 20/08/2007 16:19

what i was always lead to believe and what i actually found to be true....

You wake up at the times your baby is going to wake up once it is born, with ds i always woke at 4:38 exactly and when ds was here he used to wake at 4:38 exactly. I always thought it was rubbish until it happened....

probably just me though lol

TOD · 20/08/2007 20:49

Oh I hope not......I'll be awake every hour on the hour so!!!!
DB sorry for retaliating...guess the lack of sleep is affecting me too...a little touchy and emotional at times.........I don't know why we don't sleep before the baby is born but I suppose it is just a fact of life!!
I know it is down to discomfort and needing to wee but I still wake even if i'm not sore or needing to wee and I agree it's very frustrating but I try to keep things light and get on with it.........here's to lots of sleep sometime in the not too distant future!!!

designerbaby · 21/08/2007 11:37

Me too TOD... Hoping hat's not true ILTS otherwise I won't eb sleeping much for the foreseeable!! As for the sleeping through by 4 weeks - any tips for us first timers?!?

Hving said that though, I had almost a full night's sleep last night for the first time in I don't know HOW long... (from about midnight til approx 6am)

Weirdly I think our LO turned last night - she has been alternating breech or transverse for weeks (mostly transverse), but before I went to sleep last night it was like she was doing somersaults or something - really mental moving around -and lo and behold at this morning's ante-natal appt. she's head firmly down!

I feel a lot more comfortable today (apart from the occasinal kick in the ribs, which is a new sensation) and look quite a bit smaller than I did yesterday and wondering if a lot of my discomfort (and resulting sleeplessness) has been because of her position?

Any thoughts?

DB
xx

MrsMar · 21/08/2007 17:53

I don't know about whether the position was keeping you awake db, as far as I can tell mine is still transverse/breech and I haven't been kept awake at night by movements at all. I'm kept awake by achey hips and the impossibility of turning over in bed without a crane! I would LOVE it if the baby's movement patterns and sleep patterns in the womb translate to after they're born cos I don't get a twitch from this one until at least 9.30am every morning! He's a late sleeper like his mummy

PLP - I did have a pretty good nap... I seem to doze off around 5pm for an hour or so... cup of tea, biscuit and Richard and Judy... just sends me off. That's usually enough to get me through to the end of the evening.

dal21 · 21/08/2007 18:22

I find that napping during the day makes me even more restless at night. Yesterday slept for a solid 2 1/2 hrs in the afternoon - you know the kind of nap where you wake up in the same position you fell asleep in? Couldnt get to bed til 3am! then was fairly restless and back up by 7.30-8. Have resisted the nap thus far today to see if i sleep better tonight!

Hopeitwontbebig · 21/08/2007 18:40

Hmm dal, I think I might have made the same mistake today, I'm reeeeeeeeeally struggling to get to sleep at night and daytime naps these days seem to make it worse, which is flippin annoying when you're knackered in the late afternoon..... what's a girl to do???

dal21 · 21/08/2007 18:43

Its tough knowing what is best. On one hand, everyone says take naps and get plenty of rest. But not sleeping at night drives me nuts! I am going to avoid daytime naps for the next few days - will see if it helps.

Hopeitwontbebig · 21/08/2007 18:46

Snap!

Amorino · 24/08/2007 10:24

Hey guys! Thanks for your messages. Lydia Grace was born on 21 August and the labour went really well - gas and air, tens and breathing exercises! However I was very sleepy tired rather than physically tired so sleep when you can beforehand is my advice! xxx

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PurpleLostPrincess · 24/08/2007 10:37

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!! How lovely that you popped in to update us!! Do let us know what her sleeping patterns are like LOL!?

I find that if I nap later in the afternoon, it makes sleeping at night impossible but if I try and get a nap in earlier (12/1ish) then it helps a bit. I can't really nap for more than half an hour or an hour tops though...