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Pregnancy

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Original poster

Can I Discharge Myself? I REALLY NEED HELP.

54 replies

FakeTurtle · 28/09/2019 22:47

I was only supposed to be in hospital for one night!! For suspected pre-eclampsia. They put me on lebetalol, my blood pressure went right down. Then I had one spiked one around half 4 because I got upset just before doing the blood pressure (because I found out that I may potentially not be going home because of how long the wait times are).
Now I've been told I'm probably staying in. I'm upset, I can't stop crying, its really not helping me be here another night. The last blood pressure they did at half 8 came out within normal range 135/84, to top it off the last time I took lebetalol before then was 5 and a bit hours ago. Like just let me go home??? So I've stopped taking the lebetalol to prove a point because I'm clearly fine, I'm just upset.
I was told the doctor would come again later to talk to me and that was at 11am this morning!!
I can't stay here much longer, my stress is through the roof, I'm majorly upset and no one is telling me what's going on. Just keep saying they are treating my condition and being really vague when I ask questions.
So what would happen if I discharge myself? I'm really struggling, it's hurting me. Baby is good by the way, heartbeat and movements strong the whole time I've been here.
Please help.

OP posts:

jellymaker · 28/09/2019 22:50

Go and speak to someone at the desk and tell them exactly what you have said here. They should help you. Sometimes you have to speak up on a ward to get what you need as staff are very busy and might forget stuff. Good luck

steppemum · 28/09/2019 22:52

I just wanted to reply, because you are so distressed.
May I ask why being there is stressing you so much? Is there no way you can just relax, sleep and let your body relax a bit?

It is very late, it is unlikely you will be seen tonight and late to get yourself home.

If you do have pre-eclampsia, then you need to be where they can look after you.
x x

Falafel19 · 28/09/2019 22:53

Hello, I've been in the exact position but with labetalol not helping my BP stay down at all. You can discharge yourself but it's really not advised when it's pre eclampsia they're querying as it can worsen very quickly. I say that as somebody who wanted to discharge myself day 2 after a section because of all the pre e/BP crap, I wouldn't have discharged myself before delivery if they wanted me to stay in, I was in for 7 days from 36 weeks until he was born.

Can you go out for a walk or ask to leave during the day and come back in the evenings?

Beetlebum1981 · 28/09/2019 22:53

What's making you so stressed about staying in?

Babyiwantabump · 28/09/2019 22:55

Pre eclampsia is a serious condition . If your blood pressure is not properly controlled it may spike severely leading to seizures and sometimes death.

I don’t think you should stop taking the labetalol to prove a point . The only thing that may happen is you may make your condition worse .

They are not doing it to spite you. They are trying to keep you and your baby healthy .

Normally you need to have 24hours of well controlled blood pressure before you can go home - this is to keep you safe . They may need to adjust your medication as necessary.

That said you can also self discharge against medical advice if you so wish . They cannot keep you there against your will.

Falafel19 · 28/09/2019 22:55

Seeing the other replies sums up what it's like to be in there with suspected pre e, everyone tells you to calm down and why are you stressed! Which doesn't help one bit, nobody in the history of the world has ever relaxed after being told to relax.

Have a good cry if you can OP, that helped me when I could manage it.

Hannah1990x · 28/09/2019 23:05

I was admitted to hospital just recently for pre eclampsia before I had my daughter.

I know hospital is horrible but they just want to keep you and baby safe. It can get very serious very fast if it does end up being P/E.

Your BP would need to be stable for 24 hours before they let you go home and you'd likely need consistent good readings - 3/4 in a row. If you have other symptoms like protein in your wee or any headaches/visual disturbances this could also affect them keeping you in or not.

Some labetalol may still be in your system and could be keeping your BP down. They'll want to assess how your body reacts to different dosages/timings so they can get it right and possibly discharge you home on labetalol. Again, this is to keep you and baby safe from possible eclampsia.

I had to have an assisted delivery with my baby girl as my BP shot so high I was at risk of a stroke if she didn't come out fast.

It really can be serious and you're in the best place. I hope you are feeling better soon xx

Original poster

FakeTurtle · 28/09/2019 23:25

To answer most questions - I was told I would only need to be in here 24 hours to monitor my blood pressure. It's been down the whole 24 hours (day and night). Apart from once when they took it when I was upset and crying so it spiked just above what's classes as high blood pressure.
But it's gone down again and that's from having lebetalol ages ago. (Hence why I've stopped taking it)
There is protein in my wee but they don't understand why because I look well. They took another sample (3rd one) just before 2 and sent it off. No one has told me the results about whether I have pre-eclampsia or not within those hours. It's now 20 past 11.
Why am I distressed being here? I've been cooped up on a ward for over 24 hours with what feels like no answers (I've had consistently good readings apart from one and when I was first admitted of course) so why can't I go home? I'm only 21 and I'm by myself, I've never had to do this before and I feel like I have no support. I'm very very stressed being here for so long when I feel like I don't need to be.
The midwife has heard me crying multiple times and said shes waiting for a doc to be free to talk to me. So I've decided I'll do one blood pressure reading - if that's normal I am going, if not then I'll stay (so I'm trying to calm myself down in the meantime so I don't skew the results)
Thank you everyone for your replies @jellymaker @steppemum @Falafel19 @Beetlebum1981 @Babyiwantabump @Hannah1990x

OP posts:

Oakandlove · 28/09/2019 23:39

You are in a loop here with blood pressure readings, you have to try and stay calm. You sound quite upset, so your blood pressure readings are going to be high, no matter what you do, unless you can calm your mind. Trust me, I know, it happened to me on two pregnancies. You have to just accept that they are doing the best for you, but also for your baby.

At 21, it is probably quite abnormal to have high blood pressure readings that would cause you to be an inpatient (I was 35 when I was brought in). How many months pregnant are you? From where I am from, if you discharge yourself, your GP will be contacted and you will be on the radar as non-compliant, risky and then wrong person, wrong day, you will be subjected to extra checks. Just comply, calm down and all will be ok. It is all to get your little person out safe with a healthy mother to care for them Nobody is trying to make it hard for you. Just accept what they say. Sending you good vibes.

Ash39 · 28/09/2019 23:44

Op get some sleep and try to chill. You aren't helping yourself getting so worked up

Swatsup · 28/09/2019 23:52

This happened to me after I had had my baby. Didn’t even realise you could still get pre eclampsia. They tried to keep me in but at day 4 I insisted I was going home, insisted they contacted my consultant and threw a slight tantrum. They let me out as consultant agreed it would help lower blood pressure and I got 2/3 visits a day from my midwife for a while. Not sure I would have risked it when pregnant but I understand how you think being at home would help.
Can you ask to go home for a bit and ask your midwife for home visits??

Original poster

FakeTurtle · 28/09/2019 23:53

@Oakandlove I'm really upset, I feel like my mind has snapped and I can't deal with this anymore. It's all just too much for me, especially with the lack of answers when I feel fine (apart from the stress of being here).
I'm trying my best to stay calm because I know they are going to do another blood pressure reading in a bit, well I hope so. And I want to show that I'm fine so I can just get out of here.
I was referred here by my community midwife because of protein in my wee, and my blood pressure (usually I'm really low). I've just had severe flu, throwing up and everything so surely that could have caused the protein and the high blood pressure? After being here a night I felt loads better and it showed so I don't understand why they didn't let me go which is what caused my upset mainly. I'm currently 31wks3days.
I don't know the risks of discharging myself because I've never been placed in the position before. And what youve said is what worries me! I'm scared that I'll be seen as irresponsible and they won't support me during birth and I won't have the support from my community midwife. I'm more than happy to come along to regular outpatient apts to monitor my blood pressure and that but I'm scared that I'm being led along here and nothing is being explained in the meantime to me.

OP posts:

Original poster

FakeTurtle · 28/09/2019 23:57

@Swatsup I really feel like being at home is the right place for me because I've consistently proved my blood pressure is down to normal now. I feel like I'm wasting a bed on myself for no reason!
I'm more than happy to come back for regular appointments, I just don't see the need to keep me in for another sleepless night which is only going to make things worse for me and baby in the long run.

OP posts:

shiningstar2 · 28/09/2019 23:58

its not great I know op because I've been in your position. It was the 70s and like you I was young ...22...and I had no idea what pre eclampsia was and of course you couldn't google it. They were constantly taking my blood pressure ...even during the night and I was medicated through injections...of what I haven't a clue.

Like you I was desperate to go home and like you they didn't give much information out. Anyway ...short version...they couldn't get the blood pressure to where they wanted it and I had to stay in.

I know at the time you really want to be at home but honestly they are doing what's best for you. If you are still in I hope you get some rest and can go home tomorrow. But if you can't ...hang in there ...they are doing what's best for you and your baby. Good luck op.

Smellbellina · 29/09/2019 00:00

They want to keep you in to ensure the health of you and your baby?! What a load of cunts!

FenellaMaxwell · 29/09/2019 00:01

Look, I’m sorry you are struggling but pre-eclampsia is incredibly serious. The risk is you could die, simple as that. You need to focus on keeping calm as much as you can - you are in the best place and you are receiving medical treatment. What’s behind all the crying?

GreenTulips · 29/09/2019 00:02

They may be worried about you if you are crying and want to keep an eye on your mental health.

Weenurse · 29/09/2019 00:04

As previously stated protein in urine is abnormal and a sign of pre eclampsia. Pre eclampsia can lead to seizure ond death in mothers.
They would not keep you in hospital if it was not deemed necessary.
This will not be the only time you are stressed and waiting on answers as a parent.
Try to use it as an exercise in parenting and just try to distract yourself as you can’t change what is happening right now, only your response to it.
Start with lists of things you still need for baby.
Menu for the first week you are home and associated shopping list. Etc

Thehagonthehill · 29/09/2019 00:05

Just to say OP,135/85 is not normal for a 21 year old that and protein in your urine is why you need to stay.You will look/feel ok but it can change very quickly.You and your baby are at risk.
It's ok to be anxious but it will be downright terrifying if you go home and this developed.And take the labetalol, I'm not sure what not taking it proves except that you really haven't really understood how serious pre eclampsia is.

SD1978 · 29/09/2019 00:06

You are unsupported at home, potentially have a life threatening for both you and baby issue, and after 24 hours feel like you've broken- I'd say all these are good reasons for you to remain in hospital. You don't know the risks, yet are willing to discharge against medical advice. I get that you're frustrated, but a short admission now versus a potentially longer one surely logically makes sense? Seeing you this wound up over basically not much, is most likely also concerning to staff if you're crying and appear to be having issues emotionally.

MissPepper8 · 29/09/2019 00:07

Ah I almost don't want to say this, do they discharge on a Sunday? If I've been in (last time for hyperemesis) they've told me no consultant does rounds on a Sunday.

You could just get the sister when she does change over in the morning and explain? I'm not good with hospitals op, try relax for the baby but don't discharge yourself just remember it's to make sure if baby is ok.

keepondreaming · 29/09/2019 00:08

OP - use this time to rest. Whilst hospitals are not my favourite place to be, they do afford you the time to get some rest and be looked after (no cooking or cleaning!).

I'm sure if they thought you were well enough to go home, they'd discharge you; they don't keep people in for the fun of it.

In two months, you'll be pleased of some peaceful and restful time. Use it while you can.

PurpleViolin · 29/09/2019 00:14

CN you listen to an audio book?

MissPepper8 · 29/09/2019 00:18

I just reread your post (sorry tired baby brain) what it sounds like to me is you've come in on a weekend and it's a pain in the butt to see anyone on a weekend however they've seen your spikes and even though youre feel ok (you could be feeling OK because you've been on those meds) they want to watch you on the medication before the let you go home. They have a duty of care for you and baby.

I know how hard it is when you just want to come home and feel out of the loop, they should of seen you again to put your mind at ease. Ask to see the sister if you're still upset x

Oakandlove · 29/09/2019 00:19

@FakeTurtle I completely understand, I felt the same and nothing would persuade me that I should be staying in for high blood pressure (I didn't have even have protein in my urine). I felt my mind was cracking. My baby, my body and my blood pressure only went up going in for maternity checks. I managed by persuading them I would have extra weekly checks with my GP and that was fine but eventually had to go in at 37 weeks.

Protein in your wee, a flu and the blood pressure, they have to check it out; it can turn very, very fast with pre-eclampsia. Most people can't feel a high blood pressure, you could feel completely normal. I did.To be honest I don't think the flu would cause protein in the kidneys. Is there a night nurse on, who is nice. Could you be honest with her? Say what you have said on here.There is always one nice person who will help.

You will always be supported by aftercare, always, all I am saying is if you discharge yourself against medical advice, it may put a flag against you and come on you don't need extra monitoring and that stress. Stay calm, stay strong and say to yourself, I will accept whatever I am told in the next 24 hours. And just accept it, your blood pressure will go down, if you do tell yourself, I will accept this. If your protein in your urine is high (ask a nurse how high it is, you can ask, you are entitled to know) then for your own sake just go with it. You will be ok. Nine weeks before you have your baby and all of this will be like a distant dream to you. Try and get a good nights sleep and just accept.

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