Can I Discharge Myself? I REALLY NEED HELP.

[FakeTurtle]

I was only supposed to be in hospital for one night!! For suspected pre-eclampsia. They put me on lebetalol, my blood pressure went right down. Then I had one spiked one around half 4 because I got upset just before doing the blood pressure (because I found out that I may potentially not be going home because of how long the wait times are).
Now I've been told I'm probably staying in. I'm upset, I can't stop crying, its really not helping me be here another night. The last blood pressure they did at half 8 came out within normal range 135/84, to top it off the last time I took lebetalol before then was 5 and a bit hours ago. Like just let me go home??? So I've stopped taking the lebetalol to prove a point because I'm clearly fine, I'm just upset.
I was told the doctor would come again later to talk to me and that was at 11am this morning!!
I can't stay here much longer, my stress is through the roof, I'm majorly upset and no one is telling me what's going on. Just keep saying they are treating my condition and being really vague when I ask questions.
So what would happen if I discharge myself? I'm really struggling, it's hurting me. Baby is good by the way, heartbeat and movements strong the whole time I've been here.
Please help.

I don't feel like anyone is grasping the fact that my blood pressure has been consistently normal for 24 hours apart from one because I was crying. That's more than a good 3/4 readings in the 120/70 range. So I should be home!!
They haven't said I've got pre-eclampsia, they are refusing to tell me my results because a doctor hasn't spoken to me. And when one did at 11 he didn't know what he was talking about said that everything looked fine apart from my wee sample so I did another at 14:00 because he thought it was wrong that their was such high protein. And no one has told me that result. Can you see why I'm getting distressed being here??
I understand what's best for baby and I. Baby is more than good, I've consistently shown for 24 hours I'm okay. Now they want to keep me crying and not sleeping rather than being in my own bed asleep.

Imagine if you went home and died.

They would have to justify WHY they sent you away despite a high reading and saying oh the patient said its cos she was upset wont cut it at a disciplinary trial.

You are young with episodes of high bp and protein in wee. These are risks as high bp in young is unusual. So they will be wanting extra care.

If you want to discharge yourself fine but they will likely make you sign a disclaimer.

If you are feeling distressed and upset we can help you relax etc.

The trouble is that high blood pressure is only a symptom of pre-eclampsia if your blood pressure is usually average. If your blood pressure is usually low, then a rise of blood pressure can be a symptom of pre-eclampsia, even if that blood pressure reading isn't what would normally be considered 'high'. It's overwhelming, but as someone who begged to discharge my baby, then had to return to hospital the next day, it really is best to stay until they say it's ok to leave.

Even if your BP is okay they'll want to keep you in because of the protein in your urine. They won't let you home until that resolves.

You need to accept that you're staying in for now and figure out how to make the best of it. The doctor will be round in the morning and you'll probably get answers then.

Try to sleep for now. It'll be morning soon and you should have answers.

I have low BP and it stayed low all through pregnancy. It wasn't as high as 120/70 in labour - so although I get that generally the level you have had in the last 24 isn't high - it sounds as though it may still be high for you. Pls OP stay in hospital until your BP is closer to YOUR normal pregnancy level.

If pre-e develops it is really dangerous

I'm trying not to be unkind in my response, but in the gentlest possible way you need to get a grip and stop behaving like a stroppy teenager.

You are not in control at the moment, as your body is doing things that are outside the normal ranges.

Accept it. Stop being a dick about your health and your unborn baby's health.

I wish you and your child well.

That's the thing, they will not let you go home until you have seen a doctor to explain to you. And they are so cautious when you are pregnant especially with something like this. You never know what's going on. Wouldn't you like to be better safe than sorry?

Please don't get upset and cry just think of the positives that you and baby are ok and it's all been fine (except your wee). It's like a fuel too, the more anxious/upset you have been the more it messes with your BP.

If your blood pressure is usually low, then a rise of blood pressure can be a symptom of pre-eclampsia, even if that blood pressure reading isn't what would normally be considered 'high'.

This is true, the protein in the urine is most significant here.

They don’t keep you for no reason, it sounds like they have reasonable concern. Of course you want to be home, they want you home if possible.

You sound angry and frightened, but you need to take some deep breaths and calm yourself for the sake of your baby.

What @Ringsender2! You're unfortunately suffering a case of opening your mouth and your hormones are coming out. Not trying to be patronising, I've been there myself but by god do I look back and cringe at the dramatics from me when they were only doing their job.

My blood pressure spiked again to 144/86, I'm really trying my best to be calm.
I've never ever been like this before but I feel out of control of my own mind and body. My anxiety has just skyrocketed in this situation and I don't know how to cope which is causing me to sound so (probably) ridiculous in my replies. I am not usually this way I'm just extremely upset. So apologies for offending anyone in my replies, I can't really think straight.
The doctor has spoken to me now and he's said I need to stay in. There is protein in my wee but from the recent sample they aren't sure what the result is yet. That I am showing mild signs of pre-eclampsia (not diagnosed). Hopefully in the morning I can go home. It's all the hopefullys that are getting to me, I have autism and I'm struggling with not having answers. I need to know what to expect and not knowing is making me panic.
The midwife has asked me to try and sleep because it will mean my blood pressure will be lower in the morning. I'm going to try but I don't know if I will achieve.
Thank you for all your replies.

See there we go, maybe now you know it will set you a bit more at ease. Do they know that you have autism there? Hopefully they do so they can understand the distress in you not knowing what's going on.

Good you're on a ward with midwives, they will look after you. It's totally understandable you are distressed, they should if told you. Try Google mindfulness, itll help you switch off and breath, it always helps me sleep x

Bless your heart. Try and get some sleep Sweetheart. You're not alone, you've got your baby with you.
Just snuggle down and remember you're there for both of you. This will all be over in a few days and in a few weeks you'll get to meet that little one of yours.
You can do this

I'm sorry for my earlier reply. It was harsh and unsympathetic. Please do just try to ride it out with acceptance. I know not having answers is tough but you wouldn't be there unless you needed to be. So let that be your answer for now, and be glad that you're in the right place if anything happens. Sleep well

Is it helpful to know that you wont know, iyswim? Because it sounds like you are in the early stages of something, your body is trying to adjust and no one yet knows which direction it is going to take. So what you do know, is that you wont know anything concrete tonight, and sp you might as well get as much sleep as possible (which is not as much as of you were at home, but some is better than nothing)

Sending a hug and some 💐

Hi Faketurle
As someone that’s been in and out of hospitals a few times this pregnancy (I’m 29 weeks ish), I know how distressing it can be. They are busy lonely and overwhelming.

It’s ok to feel worried. What would you usually do to calm? Can you listen to music? Or count babies kicks?

When I’ve been in, I’ve found it helpful to tell myself that even though I may not have answers, I’m in the best place for me and little one - and that in and of itself is doing your job as a mum!

Preeclampsia as others have said, can turn quickly! They haven’t diagnosed it yet, which could be good. I know it probably feels like they are not listening, but they are asking you to stay so in case anything does happen and so they can monitor you and get more information (parts of the puzzle) to get the full picture.

Can you try to rest for now? Is there anything you need to change around you to try to sleep? (I asked for an extra blanket to “hide” myself under to make the room darker!). Is there anything you can do that would make it feel more predictable to you? Ie could you ask a nurse to explain the night checks/breakfast routine?

Thinking of you. Hope your as ok as can be. You can do this and as awful as it must feel right now, you’re in the right place for now. And hopefully will be out of there as soon as possible - and you’ll know when leaving that you stayed until you could be certain that you and baby are safe to leave! That’s brave. Best of luck tonight. There’s normally some night owls on here if you need a hand hold

If facts work better for you. The fact is you are being kept in overnight for further monitoring. There is a level of protein in your urine which currently can not be safely explained. In the morning your BP and protein will be reassessed. Unfortunate pregnancy isn't straight forward, and there isn't no straight forward answers. I really hope you can manage to get some sleep tonight x

Hi FakeTurtle, how are you this morning? Really hope you've managed to get some sleep, or at least rest a bit.
Sorry you had such a difficult day yesterday. With it being Sunday today it's likely that there will still be not many doctors around, but there should be a round of some sort. I would mention to the nurse/ midwife early on (probably after 8 then it should be the daytime nurse) that you are keen to be seen and updated by the doctor, if you think it would help you today, then they can be chasing it when the doctors appear.
Do you have any techniques that would normally help you feel in control of things in the outside world? I know that saying you're going to self-discharge probably feels like the only option in your control at the moment, but it does sound like it would be better for you to stay in for now.

Best wishes for today

OP you really must stay in hospital. Protein in wee is significant, I don't mean to scare you here but it's a sign the P/E is affecting how your body is working. If the P/E persists your liver and kidneys can begin to fail, you can progress to a condition called eclampsia, end up having seizures and potentially die. That's how serious it is.

Modern medicine now means they can prevent your condition progressing to eclampsia long before it gets to that stage but it's vital you comply and do what the experts tell you.

There is a lot of waiting with P/E (I was in a week with my daughter until I was induced a month early) - I do remember crying as they wouldn't tell me anything. It was because they don't know what conditions of P/E have potential to progress to eclampsia, so its very watch and wait and trying different drugs and dosages. You can't just take a few labetalol and you're cured, the only cure for P/E is delivery of your baby. As you are still relatively early in the third trimester it's even more vital they treat you and get that BP down to keep baby inside you long enough until it's the safest possible time for them to be born.

I was also told after I had my baby I wasn't told how serious my condition was as they didn't want to panic me and send my BP up.

Take the labetalol, if you mess around not taking it you are to be blunt playing with both yours and your baby's life. If you don't need it or the dose is too high they'll know as your BP will go too low, if that happens then they'll adjust it. But you must take it. It can also make you ill if you abruptly stop and start it. It's a medication that once you take it you need to reduce gradually.

With P/E you can also seem fine one minute and be severely ill the next, I know as it happened to me.

Can you have a chat with the midwife? I remember pouring my heart out to mine at 3am about how scared I was, she was lovely and had seen many women in my position. Press the buzzer and call her over for a chat,

Also when the consultant comes explain how not knowing is stressing you out and get them to go through your admission notes with you and ask them what their plan is.

Trust me I know how horrible it is but you need to put your baby first and let the consultants do their job and look after you both. When your baby is in your arms you'll barely even think of this, and it'll all be worth it, I promise xxx

I’ve just read through your your responses and wanted to send you some good vibes for this morning. It’s horrible being in hospital with all the beeping machines and bright lights. I totally sympathise but rest assured you are in the best place, even if all is fine at least you won’t hsve any sense of worry at home. Thinking of you 💐

It's horrible and stressful being in hospital but they really do have yours and your baby's best interest at heart.
Hope you've managed to sleep as that will definitely help with your mindset. Good luck

I remember this feeling so well. It's not good at all. The thing about pregnancy is you'll be hyper alert to feeling like you need to be in a safe space too, and your anxiety will be on overdrive thinking it's being some sort of hero, when actually it needs to just pipe down and let you think steadily for a bit. The thing here is, you are actually in the safest place you can be. I know hospitals are a strange mixture of busy plus boredom and you can start to feel invisible, with none of your familiar routines. Do you have spotify? There is a lady called Elizabeth Faulkner who has some albums out, she tells Japanese stories and plays a koto - sounds completely out there I know but I found them while looking for calming things at bed time and they're really good. It's hard to accept being kept in, but it might be easier to break the day in to chunks and plan what to do to keep the chunks passing by. Tick each hour off in your head. I hope you're asleep just now and have managed some rest. The waiting game is never easy so you need to create other games to distract yourself. I had pre - e too and felt like i couldn't get a straight answer from anyone, it's frustrating.

I had pre eclampsia and had to stay on bed rest for a month in hospital . Don't discharge yourself because you are at risk of a stroke or losing your baby . It is very serious , even on bed rest I had a TiA and my son was born at 33 weeks and was very poorly afterwards.
I know it's shit being trapped in the hospital ( I never want to go to prison ) but it's for the best .

@FakeTurtle, do they know you are in the spectrum and how not knowing is making thing uncopable with (and therefore is increasing your BP)?

I think you need to be upfront about it with them. Hopefully, that will mean they will be able to frame their answer in a way that will make things easier for you.
Bear in mind though that it looks like that they don’t understand yet what is going on and that’s why they can’t give you a definitive answer.
But you might be able to negotiate with them to be at home and have a daily check up etc....

Last thing, if you are having (autistic) meltdowns, what is helping you to come back from them? Or to prevent them usually?

I was in and out of hospital all through my pregnancy with insanely high BP. Labetalol AND Nifedipine (and another tablet too but I forget which). Nothing brought it near “normal”.
Then I had protines in my urine, twice.
So I had an emergency section under general anaesthetic at 31+2.
Trust me, you really, really are in the very best place for both you and your baby.