Baby shower for 2nd baby???

[sianyb83]

I didn't have a baby shower for my first dc, 6 years ago, I also have a lot more friends then 6 years ago (due to career change and having child I think!), so would like to have a baby shower...my bf has offered to organize it.
But will people think I'm being a diva?
Secondly, I work for an America company, and my bosses based there have already asked if I'm registered - I didn't understand at first, but had this explained as a gift register!!
The other mums at work suggested John Lewis so I have done a short list of bits I need on there (priced between 8-60 pounds), to send on to work colleague who organizing this sort of stuff. She then said reuse the list for baby shower guests??
As in anything I don't get forward on to guests.
Is that too much?
Friends at work suggested people might like it as its my second baby, they might not know what to get, or what I already have etc.
But could I come across as a diva??

Baby showers seem really grabby to me. (Sorry)

I don't even like them for a first baby, sorry.

If you make it clear that it's just a get together and that you are providing cake and food, isn't it just a more interesting version of a Birthday party?! I'd love to have been asked!

I live in the US and amongst my friends and coworkers it would be seen as grabby to do a registry or a shower for a second baby... Personally I’d let the friend organise a get together but I really wouldn’t go as far as forwarding anyone a gift list.

How welcome would an email with someone's registry gift list and baby shower invite for their second baby be if it arrived in your inbox? Let that guide your decision.

I also think it’s a bit grabby and very American. It’s not something I would have personally.

God I hate baby showers.

Me too, gift list is crazy for a baby shower

It's absolutely fine- just say no gifts!

I've just been to one, actually. The lovely lady in question only made friends after having her first. The shower was thrown by one of her new friends just because she wanted to. It was great fun.

Thinking about it, I had a "baby sprinkle" with my 3rd. My DM had just become conscious of the trend and wanted to, so I let her.

No gifts, and you're covered. I'm decidedly of the opinion that there are never enough reasons in life for cake and a cuppa with friends.

Awful idea.

Terrible idea, very granny.

Grabby even

American etiquette is very clear that baby showers aren’t the done thing for second or subsequent babies.

If you want one have one 😊

Not sure about the list part but defo go for the babyshower.
How sweet of your friend to think to organise it, its extremely common in my area for any baby and with all the games etc normally its good fun, and a great excuse to get to feel a little spoilt when you are near the end of pregnancy and feeling fed up. 🙂

Why do people think that baby showers are 'grabby'? Is it just because of the gifts? I'm not having one myself because I live far away from my friends and family, but it seems a really nice way of including people in the excitement you feel, and to celebrate together (although I too would stipulate no gifts - friends who want to can send you gifts when baby arrives!)

I think they're grabby. And so boring. I had to organise one for a close friend and I did it because I love her and it's what she wanted but it was my idea of hell on earth. I also don't like to tempt fate and would much rather people celebrate their baby after the happy arrival.

But a gift list? With prices up to £60??? You're having a laugh. That's really grabby. And it's not even a first baby? No, just no.

I really wouldn't.

People might not say anything to your face but you can be sure they'll be judging you behind your back.

'People might not say anything to your face but you can be sure they'll be judging you behind your back'

Wouldn't like to know the people you know 🤨

I'm American, have 3 kids, and wouldn't dare have a baby shower. They are just so 'grabby'.

Have a giftless baby shower... a nice tea with friends.

Baby shower is nice - you pay for tea, cake. Friends can either bring a gift or not... Getting a list that dictates you have to buy a gift? No thanks! A cup of tea doesn't warrant feeling obligated to spend 60 quid on someone whose not a relative.

A baby shower is by definition a party requesting gifts. Lovely to have a celebration with no gifts but it is not a shower.

I agree I hate them and think they are grabby and pointless. If people want to buy a present for your baby they can do, you don't need a party that screams buy a present for my unborn baby.

You say you work for an American company but not that you live in the US. If even US posters are saying this would be odd there for a second baby,, then it will definitely seem strange in the UK, where, as the replies show, baby showers are still seen as a bit of a recent import that many people don't like.

I don't think having a baby shower for your second child is such a big deal, especially if you didn't get one for your first. I wouldn't organise a gift registry and only invite your close friends (who hopefully wouldn't judge you)