Did you take your current child to first scan??

[Summersun8383]

Hi just got my scan date through and had it in my head that I wanted my DS to come with us so we make sure he's involved the whole way but the letter says they don't advise children to come. He's very well behaved and would just sit while she did it so he wouldn't distract her but don't want to get into trouble for taking him lol! Has anyone else taken their child to the first scan?

They only let DH and DD in at the end! She said she had to concentrate so wasn't allowed in booked 20 week scan for when she is in nursery as want DH to enjoy it to xx

I'll be taking my 1 year old to scans, I don't have a choice and she won't understand what's going on anyway.

@Woolly17 if your DP was with you, why would your child have had to sit in the car or stay at home with the cats? surely he could have looked after your DD.

OP, I had very bad news at a my first 20 week scan. I'd rather have had DH with me at my recent (2nd pregnancy) anomaly scan, but entirely understandably the hospital don't allow children present so DH waited with DD in the hospital cafe. That way he was nearby if I was given bad news again. The sonographer said DD and DH could come in for a minute at the end to see the baby once all the anomaly scan element was complete. This might be an option?

Please don't take your child. Your trust might not allow you to anyway.

It's a medical procedure and your sonographer has to concentrate - you will struggle to keep an eye on your child while laid down. Also, what if your scan shows there is something wrong...do you want your child to witness that?

My fiend is an sonographer and has had to deliver bad news while children were in the room and it's incredibly traumatic.

It’s a no here. They will only allow children in the waiting room of our ante natal dept if another adult is present. And then that adult has to stay with them and not go to any appointments to accompany the pregnant woman (appointee??)

As others have said it’s a medical appointment. Would you take your child to a smear test? Or similar?

So god forbid, if there's something wrong; how will you explain that to your child? You really haven't thought this through. You don't include them. It's a medical appointment. Show them the scan afterwards, but please don't take them.

Another vote for ‘please don’t’. Of course chances are good that it’ll all be fine and well, but if there’s bad news to break it’s going to be horrible for him and for you. Book a private scan for a bit later on and take him to that.

It's a no here. You never know if you'll be getting bad news.

Our hospital doesn't allow it. Like another poster said I've seen people told to rebook their scan when they've turned up with kids (despite the letter clearly stating one adult with you no children any any circumstance) or having to make partner and child wait outside the EPU area. The reception said not only is it to because the sonographer needs to concentrate its a medical exam not a day out. Also they have to be considerate of other people who may be getting bad new or be there for upsetting reasons so they don't want children running around .

Tbh I don't see how you'd fit a child in with you in our hospitals scan room! Barely enough space for the chair for DH

I meant to say if you want your child to be part of it wait until after you've had the scan had good news and book a private one. They're geared towards those kinda family experiences

Our hospital will not allow children at any of the scans so you have to arrange childcare or your DH waits outside with them and isn’t there for the scan.

After all these posts you’re still planning to take him?

You can involve your child by showing them the scan picture afterwards. Don’t take them for the many excellent reasons already given.

My hospital I’m under now are another that don’t allow children at all. In my previous pregnancy we did take our then-18mo and it was bad news. Luckily she didn’t understand but it was frustrating having to contain her in a small side room after the scan while we waited for an hour for someone to come and talk to us about what was going to happen next.
I’m now 17 weeks pregnant and daughter is 7. She’s not been to any scans yet but we have a private gender scan on Saturday that she is coming too. I’m still nervous that they will find something wrong to be honest (I have no reason to believe anything is wrong, I’m just anxious). She won’t be coming to the 20 week scan (she’s in school anyway, but regardless, the hospital don’t allow children)

As others have said, it’s a medical appointment, not a family day out.

Repeating what's been said already, don't take him pay for a private 'social' scan if you want to make it special for him and to have him attend

Will he really understand what’s going on, anyway? There are a thousand ways of involving your child in your pregnancy without taking them to an appointment which may result in devastating news. Your attitude smacks of “well it won’t happen to me”.

I’m in the camp of no children at scans. I don’t want to be pessimistic but you could get bad news and it would be awful to have your other child there. There are so many important measurements to take and the sonographer needs to fully concentrate.

Having said that my EPU has a toy box so some people must take their children. I wouldn’t.

Wow my hospital must be completely different then, I was quite sure it was ok but as I was walking in the room I double checked and said is it ok if my son and partner come in, the sonographer said yes that's absolutely fine. My son was 3 and was really excited to see the baby, if there had been an issue I would have sent him out with his dad. The waiting room was for midwife appt and antenatal clinic too and had a few children in it. That was for my 12 week scan in a London hospital.

There are actually usually lots of young children in the waiting area at my hospital and I did take mine to my 20 week scan but that was unavoidable as it was during Christmas week so no normal childcare. He didn’t know what was going on and got a bit restless and I wouldn’t normally have taken him. Risk at that point was low anyway as I’d had NIPT, was feeling movement etc but still I’d have rather not taken.

We took DS1 and my MIL. We got bad news about abnormalities which might point to DS. I was very upset and I wish we hadn’t taken him. I hadn’t even considered the possibility at that point.

@summersum8383 I took my DS (7) with me but only because I had no choice. My hospital said it was okay and DH and DS waited while the sonographer checked there was a heartbeat and then they came in and watched the rest. However there was still a risk of something being wrong (luckily not) but like I say, we have no family or friends nearby and no choice that time. I wouldn't have taken DS in any other circumstances just in case.

Perhaps have your 12 week scan without your DS and then book a private one when you know everything is okay?

No i wont take my ds to the scan. Aside from having an mmc and knowing the awfulness in that moment, never want to put him through it, I'd be conscious of others getting bad news around me who would struggle to see a child or baby in that moment.

If i did take him to a scan, I'd do a private 4d one in the last trimester when there's less risk and he would know about the baby anyway. --couldn't afford one though sadly-'

My 12w scan specified 1 person to accompany, no kids. I saw a few dads looking pissed off in the waiting room with children - I witnessed one being turned away from the scan room with a toddler so presume it happened to the others. Just know you risk your partner not being allowed in!

Nope, in fact I wouldn't take a child to a scan until I knew everything was going ok with some certainty.
I have been in a scan when I was told there was a problem and it was as if the world was falling apart. It was hard enough to deal with just me and DH.
As we actually found out we lost a child at our 20wk scan (this was devastating and I couldn't even go straight back to pick DS1 up as I was in such a state) we didn't take DS1 to DS2s scan until my scan at 35wks (I had scans every 2/3 weeks throughout pregnancy)

BTW DS didn't feel left out, he was quite involved in my pregnancy and adores his brother but we involved him in other ways. He was at an age that he could comprehend too as he was 8 when DS2 was born.