Have you or are you planning on finding out the sex?

[NotReadyForThisX2]

Pregnant with second Dc, didn't ask with Ds because I wanted to wait and wasn't planning on asking with this one. But Dp is desperate to know, he wanted to with Ds too but I said no.

I know they can't always tell anyway and that the sex isn't the purpose of the scan, but now I can't decide if we should ask or not.
We won't have a private scan so if they can't tell clearly we won't know and we've only just had our 12 week scan so got a while before the next one.

But I was just curious to what others are doing and reasons why.... just can't wait or think it's easier to prepare if you know.

I quite liked with Ds that me and Dp has a little time with him in the hospital when only we knew (and the midwife and hospital staff of course). But it was nice and phoning people to say 'we've had a boy'.

My first pregnancy we didn't find out, this pregnancy my husband is desparate to find out but I don't want to. I think it's because first time round we had a daughter, this time he wants a son so we have one of each

I'm determined not to find out though as it was lovely him announcing the sex at birth, and just keeping that little surprise right until the very end added a little excitement to the birth

I found out with my first but it was because my dad had cancer and we wasn’t sure whether he’d make it until I gave birth and I wanted him to know if he’d have a grandson or granddaughter (it was a boy - and thankfully he got to meet him!).

The father of my first child didn’t want to know so I went through everything alone. I’m now with a new partner who is so thrilled that we’re having a baby and he really wants to know what it is even though I’d like to wait until birth. I’m going to find out for my partner, and we have a private scan booked on my Dad’s birthday next month so we can turn a sad day into a happy one. I love the idea of calling people once the baby is born to say whether it’s a boy or girl and I like wondering what it will be, but because I found out with my first I don’t think it took anything away from the birth, it was still just as amazing knowing the sex (although I can’t really compare because I’ve never had a birth where I’ve not known).

First pregnancy we found out at 6 weeks it was twins so decided that was enough of a surprise so we found out to try and make planning easier. We originally weren't going to find out when we found out I was pregnant. We told everyone the sex at 20 weeks.

Second pregnancy (31 weeks now) we found out at 18 weeks but haven't told anyone which has been really nice us both knowing but no one else having any idea.

My first pregnancy. We both want to know but baby was in the most awkward position and they couldn't tell. Going for another one in about two weeks so hope bubba is in better position

This is my first and I really don’t want to find out until the birth. Not anti- sexing, just like the idea of OH telling me after I’ve done the hard work!

This is OH’s third, he has a girl,9 and a boy,13 and he wants to know because he wants his children to have a chance to prepare for this (very UNWANTED 😔) brother or sister!

I see his point. But I’m closed off to the idea now!

I found out with both of mine, not for any other reason than I was impatient and just wanted to know 🙂
The idea of a surprise is lovely and I can see why people choose to but for me I wanted to be able to buy things in advance for girl/boy. Not that everything has to be pink/blue but you get what I mean.
Plus the excitement of finding out at the scan is just as precious and it allows you to narrow down only having to think about a name for one sex rather than both and that's hard enough as it is lol!

We found out the last 2 times - we have a DD and a DS.
I was thinking about having a surprise this time with DC3, but DD (just turned 4) has made her feelings quite clear regarding the possibility of another brother So I think we are going to find out just to give her a bit of time to get used to the idea of a brother or sister before the baby is born.
DS literally couldn’t care less if I was having a girl, a boy or a llama

I didn’t find out with my first but I’m tempted to find out now with my second, no particular reason just curious I guess. I think I’m going to wait until the 20wk scan and decide then. My DH is easy either way.

It's my Dp who's desperate to know too @Bambamber and @Longislandicedme. He's not bothered either way but he keeps asking if we can find out.

I do think practically, there's some of Ds's clothes I wouldn't put on a girl (not that it should matter) so if we know it's a girl we could get rid of those.

Plus he wanted to know with Ds and I didn't so I got my way, maybe it's his turn to get his way this time.

Name issue though definitely Ccec. Ds didn't have a name for the first week as I'd felt sure we were having a girl so kinda agreed to Dp's boys name and then he was born and I was like nah, don't like it.

We found out at the 20w scan with DS and have a private gender scan booked (for next week!) with my current pregnancy. I like knowing and so does DH - I like referring to the baby as 'he/she' and planning the name etc. I have to say though, I can see why it's a nice surprise to wait and I don't know anyone who's regretted either way. I would advise anyone who is pinning all their hopes on one sex to find out in pregnancy though - my friend had terrible gender disappointment on the day of her child's birth and it really ruined it for her. Better to find out earlier so you can come to terms with it beforehand.

We found out with our first but I still had a lot of neutral things and the nursery was neutral so we could use it again etc..

I didn't want to find out this time but my husband does... I'll probably give in as the planning is easier lol

I'm pregnant with my first and my DH is struggling a bit to get his head around it. It is a planned pregnancy but it happened quicker than expected and caught him off guard a little. I don't want to find out the sex but he does, as he's had enough of surprises for now (!), so I think as a compromise we'll find out but not tell anyone else (so we can still have the "it's a boy/girl!" phone calls after). I think he'll be able to bond better if he can imagine a son / daughter rather than what feels to him like a rather abstract, generic baby.

It seems more partners who want to know. I wonder if it helps them feel more connected knowing or something. Dp isn't bothered boy or girl, I'd quite like a girl just because I'm so close to my own mum, but I think another boy would be easier as they are really close in age.
Think my mum and Dp's mum are hoping for a girl.

I feel sure it's a boy though, I feel very similar to how I felt with Ds.

KatnissKringle that’s a fair point too. It would be nice to be able to say he/she instead of referring to ours as “foetus” for another 20-odd weeks

I didn't find out with my first two - I wanted the moment of DH telling me it was a boy.

Didn't happen either time, both times EMCS where we were shell shocked and the anesthetist told us.

Third time I went for a scan on my own, they found out, it went into an envelope for my husband to tell me at 17 weeks. Which he did but again not a romantic gesture because I picked him up off a night flight. (Third was our third boy 😍)

I found out (I had a strong feeling it was a girl anyways), purely for the fact that I will be a single mother and I feel as if this whole pregnancy & giving birth is enough of a huge surprise as it is!

I'm defo going to find out! Mainly because I am really impatient. Also I feel like I can be more prepared. And theres the fact that I have a long line of people who want to knit things for me and want to know colours etc! Lol

We found out after having a harmony test and I'm glad we did. It's nice saying "her/she" rather than "the baby" all the time, and thinking about her nursery. I like a bit of pink but I'm thinking about longevity and being able to reuse stuff if I have a boy in the future, so I haven't bought anything girly really. Yet!

It's a lovely surprise whether you find out at 12w or 40. My DSis found out with both of hers and it was still wonderful to hear of their safe arrival- and with her first she said she was glad she knew before as she was so exhausted and out of it it wouldn't have been the memorable big reveal many would hope for.

I never would, I'd never want to know until the birth. I think it's much nicer to find out when your baby is there in the room with you.
Plus I'm superstitious and never buy anything but the hospital essentials until after the birth anyway, and I don't like nurseries so would never have a room decorated for my baby.

I wanted to know with my first as I was excited and wanted to buy clothes (kept seeing super cute clothes and was dying to buy some)
Second one he kept flashing his bits at every scan so we knew anyway! (had extra ones due to previous pregnancy complications and at every scan he was like wohoo look at my bits)

Ha @Mummyto2munchkins. I had a growth scan with Ds and she quickly asked if we knew and moved the scanner. We said no and she was careful after but Dp said after he was born that he thought he'd seen boy bits.

Think I'll let him find if they can tell. I did really like that moment of seeing him for the first time, but I can't imagine knowing the sex takes anything away from that moment anyway.

I had my heart set on not finding out and my partner was happy to do whatever I wanted

Recently we have started looking at clothing and due to the choice near us being horrendous I have now decided to find out. I also think it will drive me crazy not knowing.

But either way it will be special when you find out. Can't imagine it takes anything away on the birth day as will still be magical seeing and holding your baby xx

I plan to find out, and my partner wants to find out also. We are both impatient people and I feel knowing would add to our excitement in ways that we can refer to our baby as our little girl/boy, and trial out specific names too.

I did say I’d want it to remain our secret though so upon birth it’s revealed... but don’t know how easy that would be to keep a secret. My partner wanted a “gender reveal” gimmick and i’ve said no to that as I don’t really like the idea. I don’t want to know to ‘tell people’ I want to know just for our purposes of visualising our baby, our future and what its name will likely be.

We both wanted to know so found out. It's been nice organising the nursery, being able to agree on a name and say he/she/the name rather than 'it' or just 'the baby'. Gender neutral clothes only come in so many colours and I didn't want to have to go out clothes shopping with a newborn.

I'm an organiser at heart and it's made life easier for me.

With a second, we will find out, for the same reasons but also because I think telling a (possibly young) child that they are having a baby brother or sister makes it easier for them to understand and come to terms with than just a baby.