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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

BORED of people insisting on giving me advice

39 replies

grimupnorth1 · 02/01/2019 01:00

Sorry in advance this is a rant but I'm hormonal and FED UP.

Is anyone else SICK to death of people giving unsolicited advice constantly?

I'm 24 weeks this week and I've had a pretty crappy pregnancy so far, suffering with HG but I'm the kind of person who just gets shit done and cracks on.

I feel like I've started to avoid socialising because I'm just so sick of everyone trying to give me their advice on pregnancy and parenting constantly. Do people not just realise that every pregnancy and every baby is different?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

GreenTulips · 02/01/2019 01:02

Nope and it gets worse

Wait till ‘I told you so’ happens

Original poster

grimupnorth1 · 02/01/2019 01:33

@GreenTulips Dreading that! Makes me want to never speak to anyone!

OP posts:

YerAuntFanny · 02/01/2019 02:00

It is annoying, and I hate to say it but it carries on.

Mine are 12 and 5 and people are still dishing out advice to me, I just smile and nod remembering that they are trying to be helpful :)

nocoolnamesleft · 02/01/2019 02:06

Well, now. What you need to do, when people start giving you unsolicited advice...

[grin} Sorry, couldn't resist.

GabbyGal · 02/01/2019 10:20

Especially when it’s bad advice. My DP’s sister, who has been a nurse for 25+ years, told me that my GP would try to make me take medication for the nausea but I mustn’t take it because it will damage the baby. I mean I’m pretty sure they’re not handing out thalidomide anymore 🙄

She’s also anti-vaccine so can’t wait for that to come up 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I feel your pain OP.

Notthisoneagain · 02/01/2019 10:24

I havent had this much but I think it's mainly because I'm the type of person to shoot someone down and tell them I'm NOT doing it that way because I don't want to!

I am, however, sick of people asking if my pregnancy was planned!!!! How f@@king rude!!!

WeeBean · 02/01/2019 12:25

Yep! I really barely left the house because of sickness and vomiting but I'm fed up of "have you tried ginger..." No, I've had three different types of meds that didn't even take the edge off but I'm sure ginger will be the miracle cure 🙄 (It was the first thing I tried, did not work)

LeeCee · 02/01/2019 12:31

My fave so far was advice to shave the baby's first hair so it will grow back nice and thick

Original poster

grimupnorth1 · 02/01/2019 12:37

These are making me feel much better 😂😂

Oh yes, I'm throwing up 30+ times a day but I've definitely not thought of trying ginger stuff, thanks 🙄🙄🙄 I'll throw up on the next person to suggest it!

OP posts:

sirmione16 · 02/01/2019 12:37

SAME. 37 weeks pregnant, and had it all the way through. More annoyingly, when I was at work in the restaurant, customers would so so so often comment on this and that or touch my bump without asking. And bare in mind I'm seeing maybe 200 plus people through the door each day, and most of them have some sort of "advice" or want to ask questions. I'm SO glad I'm on maternity for that reason alone!!

It's the ones that are like "ready for your life to change? Nothings going to be the same now" and I just think well of course, it's a child not changing which milk I'm using ffs. I think pregnancy rage hormones make it harder to smile and be polite too.

Original poster

grimupnorth1 · 02/01/2019 12:38

@GabbyGal oh my gosh that sounds rough- from a nurse too! Do comment here when you've had the vaccine conversation 😂

I accidentally broke it to DH's grandmother that we wouldn't be having a christening yesterday...

OP posts:

sirmione16 · 02/01/2019 12:46

@grimupnorth1 way too early to have the grief of christening vs no christening. !! I'm holding back telling my ILs

My FIL has refused to find out the sex, when literally everybody else in our lives knows it's a boy. Can't talk about baby around him in case "he" is said. It's like waking on egg shells!!! I hate it!!

fee1234 · 02/01/2019 12:51

I feel the same! It's getting ridiculous. We have actually decided not to tell anyone when I'm in labour to at least keep that bit for ourselves !

TulipsTwoLips · 03/01/2019 11:25

I think the type of people who like to give advice would give it whatever your circumstances! Boyfriend advice, husband advice, work advice etc. I think it's just their way. Bloody annoying though!

le42 · 03/01/2019 11:50

Not quite advice but I was just in M&S getting new bras as none fit anymore and cashier said “you look tired. Remember it’s only one push.” I said I am bloody tired, I’m 37 weeks pregnant with a huge heavy baby, I’ve got crippling SPD so I can hardly move so yes I’m not as well rested as I’d like!

Imagine telling a stranger they look tired!! 🙈

Littleraindrop15 · 03/01/2019 11:55

I have HG and I am currently 25weeks and the amount of ginger biscuit and tea advice for my sickness and nausea is piss taking. No Sally it hasn't gone away after 16 weeks it's not going to get better now that I am ballooning with ginger!!!

AimseyR · 03/01/2019 12:02

These stories have properly made me laugh out loud! I know it's not funny when you're on the receiving end (and I have been, a lot) but you do wonder if people would have a different approach if they could hear how they sound telling other people all this stuff!
Also, remembering we're all hormonal and not our normal selves ... had to bite my tongue so hard a couple of days ago when someone told me my life is now over....lovely, happy New Year to you too!

Jellylegss · 03/01/2019 12:15

27 weeks.. hg and spd. Some witch gave me ginger biscuits for Christmas sweets... they were almost returned as a suppository. My doctor started with reassuring me “sickness is normal” after I loosing 15lbs in just over a week, shortly after I redecorated his room and the bin he did decide to prescribe me something for the nausea. My employers the biggest gem, after being signed off because I can barely walk (active job and a 2 hour commute with 1.5mile walk) they were on the phone to scream at me. I apologised that my contraceptive had failed and this wasn’t a planned pregnancy nor was my hg or spd (because frankly I didn’t know what the heck to say) and I was met with “oh come on it’s 2018!” Like sorry my pill/pcos/endo wasn’t informed of its new 100% success rate . I’d tried with my exp for over a year n hadn’t even had a squinter so I really didn’t think I’d fall on contraception with dp.

Springmummy19 · 03/01/2019 12:20

yup, I hear you. I'm a FTM and I feel like everyone is now an expert on pregnancy, don't get me wrong, I appreciate it but I get really frustrated when people tell me that something is wrong because whats happening to me did't happen to them until later on and what hasn't happened to me should have happened by now.

When I told my SIL that i could feel baby move at 16 weeks she was literally shocked and said ' I didn't feel my little one move until 26 weeks, you sure its baby? you must have just felt a fart' I was so so pissed off with her but the best thing was that my other SIL (her elder sister) straight away said 'no, I felt my little one move at 16 weeks too, it's not kicks but like flutters... she STILL continues to ask me a question, compare it to her pregnancy and then is very quick to tell me I must have it wrong,

then there are the ones who have never had a baby but suddenly become an expert also. I have just stopped talking about my pregnancy to anyone other than a handful of people who genuinely take an interest in MY pregnancy rather than want to judge. I just wish people would understand that every physical body and every baby is different.

harrypotterfan1604 · 03/01/2019 12:31

40 weeks here and totally fed up of the advice. On New Year’s Day my DPs nan decided to tell me that our child won’t be a naughty one because he/she will be getting a smack ....guess who’s off the babysitting list?!?😡
Also fed up of being told not to hold my baby too much because it’ll be “spoilt” and don’t be one of these mums who doesn’t leave their child with anyone when they’re tiny because I’ll be making a rod for my own back 🙄
If one more person tells To hurry up and have this baby I may lose my shit! And last but not least the oh well enjoy the rest now while you can comments can also kindly fuck off 😂
Can anyone tell I’m grumpy hahahah!

Springmummy19 · 03/01/2019 12:37

harrypotterfan1604 ahahahah other than the hurry up one I've had them all.

LeeCee · 03/01/2019 12:41

Oh yes @harrypotterfan1604 "don't pick the baby up" - get that one a LOT.

Sure I'll just let my newborn cry alone on the floor from birth 👌

PregnantSea · 03/01/2019 12:58

I love this thread, makes me feel so much better! Thank you ladies!

I think it's important to remember that we are hormonal and probably overreacting on occasion, but it's still irritating AF and people should understand that we're hormonal, especially women who have been through it themselves!

One funny thing I've learnt to do is when someone tells me I look tired, sick, big etc I just smile and say "so do you" Hubby says it's rude but I don't care because it makes me feel sooooo much better!

AimseyR · 03/01/2019 13:06

Love love loving the "so do you" comeback....some people just need the shock tactic, subtlety doesn't cut it!

Freddiepurrcury · 03/01/2019 13:12

I got urged by a friend to get more exercise when I was starting to get symptoms of SPD. It took three half hour walks to become full on SPD and I could barely stand up for the rest of my pregnancy

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