BORED of people insisting on giving me advice

[grimupnorth1]

Sorry in advance this is a rant but I'm hormonal and FED UP.

Is anyone else SICK to death of people giving unsolicited advice constantly?

I'm 24 weeks this week and I've had a pretty crappy pregnancy so far, suffering with HG but I'm the kind of person who just gets shit done and cracks on.

I feel like I've started to avoid socialising because I'm just so sick of everyone trying to give me their advice on pregnancy and parenting constantly. Do people not just realise that every pregnancy and every baby is different?

I was just about to start a similar thread!!
My tolerance for people has really decreased the further along I'm getting in my pregnancy (33 weeks tomorrow) I don't want to see anyone - more so my family cause they're fucking annoying as hell now a days, this is the first grandchild for my parents and great grand child for my grandma and everyone wants to just be involved or come and visit, like I've not even had the poor boy yet and people just want to visit already. I was due to have my mum at the birth but she's been too full on about 'my grandson this and my grandson that' FUCK OFF!! He's MY SON! That I've told her I have changed my mind and think it's important it's just me and my partner as we turn from a couple into a family. I had a rant to my step sister this morning to get some of it off my chest but I'm just on the verge of sending an all round message saying everyone back off. I feel like I'm being mauled with oh is your hospital bag ready anything can happen, have you got everything ready - my answer always, NO! Are you going to BF, oh I'll get this so dad can help with night feeds (I will be trying to breast feed so dad won't be able to help with night feeds initially but there we go the item is already purchased. Unfortunately (on one level) we live really far from family so no one can just 'pop by' but then when people come they stay and sometimes for one night sometimes for 2/3 and I don't even want to be around people, I can't stand my partner some days and that's not his fault it's mine cause I just have zero tolerance for anyone. All I want is to be on my own and no one to talk to me unless I talk first - so selfish I know but I honestly don't care by this point. Sorry to rant on your post! Your not alone I know how your feeling @grimupnorth1 and it's made me into such a cow now I hate it!

@sirmione16 I thought I was the only one whose FIL is being totally ridiculous!!! I'm in exactly the same situation. I just don't understand why he's being so awkward about knowing the gender when it's not even his baby!! Ugh!!

@AimseyR I work in a hospital (although now signed off until MAT leave starts) and I am quite clearly pregnant, one of the patients said so your pregnant too are you (3 of us on the ward pregnant) I replied with a simple yes I am, is it that obvious and chuckled, he turned round and said so you've basically just ruined your life then! I was like WTF!! I simply said 'I like to refer it to My life is about to change a lot yes but I wouldn't say I have ruined it considering I actually really love this baby and want him' and walked off, can't believe the things some people say! It's a good job I wasn't feeling massively sensitive that day cause I would have just cried at him lol

I posted a pic of some big prawns on instagram on Xmas day and received a message from someone I've not spoken to in ages saying 'OMG you can't eat those!!'

Why do people feel they know best and can just try and tell you what to do???! I was too angry to reply to her. I'm also at the stage where I don't give anything away, names etc, because I'm sick of everyone's stupid opinions.

You are not alone

Suddenly everyone is a qualified doctor or midwife when you become pregnant

So annoying

Same!

24 weeks and having a bit of a time. Bladder spasms, interstitial cystitis etc and if one more person suggests cranberries and hot water bottles I'll kill them!!

Just to add to the annoyance. We have picked our baby names and kept them to ourselves we’ve picked one boy and one girls name but do have back up names incase at the time we decide neither are right. My MIL broke my DP and he told her our names (which made me very cross!) she’s since told my SIL who is expecting twins and told me last week how much she wants to call one of the twins our boys name!! I’m furious! I’m due first so I’ll be using the name regardless but it’s still really pissed me off.

@LeeCee, I’m lost for words!

My MIL was full of ‘useful’ advice and we loved next door to her so I couldn’t really escape it. She would reprimand me for picking her up. One night DD had slept through and my boobs were so uncomfotable that I had to express some milk into a bottle at 2am. I whacked it in the fridge and used it a DD’s morning feed, MIL walked through tutted and said ‘you soon switched to formula, I breastfed all 4 of mine. You should be doing it for a minimum of 6 months.’ Her face dropped when I told her it was expressed.

@harrypotterfan1604 Who the fuck are these people? Seriously??

Hope you have your other half a metaphorical slap into next week as well.

Can’t relate to this enough!
MIL seems to turn her nose up at everything - from names we’ve chosen (“ugh I hate that name!”),to the hospital I’ve chosen to give birth at, to telling us that our plan of having our newborn in a cot next to our bed won’t work (“babies are so noisy you won’t want her sleeping in your room. My boys were in their own rooms after the second night!!”). Its all age old, complete rubbish advice and delivered in that annoying “I think you’ll find” kind of know it all way . I knew it was going to be tough early on when she told me I was pregnant not ill when i was getting awful nausea in the first weeks (yes, she sailed through both pregnancies so seems to think I shouldnt complain?). It’s so strange because we normally get on so well but she’s changed towards me since I’ve been pregnant. On the other hand have had some really good non pushy advice from other relatives/friends which I’ve really welcomed!
I’ve found a good response to unwanted advice, said with a grateful smile , is “thanks for the advice but we’re looking forward to working things out for ourselves” or “I guess everyones experience is different but I’ll definitely take it on board!!”. Xx

I've got all boys and each time I'm pregnant I get told I'm "trying for the girl then" and when I do find out it's another boy and no doubt I will again this time (no complaints here I love being a boy mum) I will get "oh what a shame" or "you'll have to go again then." I'm not easily offended but this seriously gets to me particularly when they say it in front of my sons, I'd not change them for anything and it really really does not matter to me at all. Also My MIL who I love dearly TBF has come out with some corkers about how tired/ill I look, I started saying "oh well I'm not at all" and my husband had a word and she doesn't anymore but I know she wasn't trying to be hurtful she's just honest and I'm quite fair so I don't look as bright with less make up on in the winter. The other thing was telling everyone we had our last child because we were copying/following my SIL after she had her first a year before (we had other children before this 🤔 and don't plan our family around others but still.) She's lovely anyway she's just very proud of her daughter I think so bringing it back to her is more about that than trying to put us out. I think the must be trying for a girl thing is also people's way of showing interest but I just put it out there how much it gets on my nerves before anyone has chance to start with it all.... It seems to be working as sort of pre warning people not to go there. 😂Xx

Oh and something else that really annoys me.

My boss keeps messaging me but almost every time I say something about my baby she says 'rather you than me'. I find it really rude!!

@notthisoneagain in my experience people who say things like that are actually insecure and she probably would rather it was her. But it’s your boss so what do you even say to that?!

You are probably right, she's never had children and comes across quite bitchy at times. It's just something I would dream of saying to anyone! She's just got engaged but I wouldn't say 'rather you than me'!