Midwife made me really sad

[physicskate]

So I've had spd since crazy early!! Turning in bed has been a nightmare since 9 weeks and I'm now 27+4. Some days I can't walk which has left me pretty isolated. My job involves walking and moving things from place to place, but I only work two days a week, which is a godsend.

I've been to the 'group' physio session and now have an appointment for 1-1 where they will actually look at me and my joints.

Had my 28 week appointment today and the midwife (who I otherwise adore) was so dismissive and told me they won't do anything while I'm pregnant and have I been on the pelvic partnership website (which bye says there is lots of manipulations that should be done during the pregnancy).

It's just left me feeling really upset that my midwife basically said why bother, just be in agony whenever you move for the next three months (on top of the four months it's already been like this). I completely understand that physio May be of absolutely no use, but it felt like she didn't believe how much pain I'm actually in.

She told me to get up from the couch after doing my fundal height and I literally couldn't move because my sacro-iliac seized up, even though I was engaging my pelvic floor and core muscles and using my arms.

I just can't face true next three months of this much pain whiteout anyone taking me seriously!!! Plus pregnancy hormones are on the rampage and I've got a bad cold!!!

Did anyone's spd at least not get worse from physio?!?!

I had bad SPD with my first and my midwife basically told me to get on with it as there wasn't much that could be done. She put it in a nice way, but it did leave me a little deflated.

I found that actually moving less didn't help. Made myself go for walks or even just walk around the house doing jobs to stay active.

I can walk the first 100m of the day relatively pain free... it's all downhill from there. By the end of the day at my job I can't move at all.

Have you thought about seeing your GP about it rather than the midwife? I've had the same issue and was referred within days and also signed of work for a few weeks whilst it was really bad and waiting for adjustments at work.

Oh and she said it's 'normal' to not be able to walk some days at 28 weeks?!?! That certainly isn't what I've seen or read!!!

I'm just fed up of the pain and what has been a not very straightforward pregnancy after several years of infertility....

Sorry for the rant - I'm normally not a very emotional person!!!!!

Have you got one of the support belts? If you can afford it you could try seeing a private physio, I don’t think it’s true at all that nothing will help.

There is hope for physio... I didn’t have it as bad as you have, by the sounds of it. I paid a private physio to just get seen quickly and properly and he literally worked miracles - I would say if you can afford it, it is worth a go.

Ditto the support belt. 💐

The support belt helps for a few hours and then makes it worse somehow?? I've only had it two weeks...

I honestly am not expecting miracles, but hopeful for some (minor) improvement!

That sounds miserable @physicskate. I've had on and off spd, usually when the baby's head down so I do sympathize.

I think the reaction you got isn't uncommon. I've had similar about bad heartburn and back pain - "Yup, you're pregnant, sucks to be you, get your act together and get on with things." It's like you're expected to deal with pain and discomfort because you're pregnant. You know damn well that if men had babies not only would all these things be taken much more seriously, giving birth would be pain free by now as well.

I saw a physio about the spd and they talked about some exercises, which didn't help really and then told me there was four month waiting list to see a physio on the NHS (by which time the baby will be here - so useful) however they also said that seeing a private oesteopath could help if I could afford it and there were people who help treat me. I've not seen anyone as my spd has eased off now, but it might be worth considering as you're still in loads of pain.

I'd second seeing the gp. I had bad SPD with my first and had physio, crutches and accupuncture through the NHS. Unfortunately it didn't make a lot of different but support belt helped and I know accupuncture does work for some people. Also things like satin pyjamas for turning in bed, a good support pillow and resting as much as you can X

Poor you. I've found spd really demoralising because it's just so incapacitating. I've had it twice and both times had one to one physio, the one that actually manipulated my joints had more impact on my mobility. This time round she just shows me how to go from sit to stand other 'advice'. Generally I've found the GP much more supportive than my midwife, you can get pain relief if it's stopping you sleep and the physio might order you some crutches. Good luck!

Bollocks to that! There's loads to be done. I did a prenatal yoga class that really helped my SPD. Doing just 5-10 min x 3 each day transformed how much pain I was in. Downward dog with your knees bent is great. So is getting all fours and swaying in a circle. Don't give up OP.

I'm sorry your midwife was so dismissive and unsupportive

I agree with PP's advice to see the GP instead.

I had PGP in pregnancy and it wasn't as bad as yours but it was still debilitating and demoralising. There is no magical cure but there are several things that can help:

• Rest. You shouldn't be pushing it and you certainly shouldn't be doing a job that requires walking/standing all day. Get your employer to make reasonable adjustments. See the GP as they should do a fit note stating that you can't walk/stand for long periods and if they can't provide alternative work then you can't work.
• Osteopathy, you would have to go private for this so it depends whether you can afford it, but I found an amazing osteopath (recommended by lots of people) and he made a huge difference to my pain and discomfort.
• Physio can give you various aids and exercises that may help although I personally found this less helpful than the osteopathy
• Pregnancy yoga and/or Pilates, obviously make sure you tell the instructor you have PGP. The gentle exercises should help.
• Swimming. Well i didn't really swim much, but being in the water was amazing! It just takes all the weight and pressure off your body. Actually if you have a big bath that will have a similar effect. My friend also had PGP and spent hours in the bath at the end!

Lastly make sure that you have a birth plan (well I called it "birth preferences") and make it clear that you have PGP. There are certain positions and things in labour that you should avoid, just to minimise discomfort and injury.

My PGP did go almost immediately after the birth and I think that's true for most people. So hang on in there!

Lots of cross posts, great minds and all

OP, it is NOT normal to not be able to walk at 28weeks. I am still running up 8 flights of stairs every morning at work at 37 weeks! (promise I am not saying that to be a 'look at me' kind of dick, just a comparison to someone in a pregnancy who isn't suffering SPD.) I most definitely wasn't like you at 28 weeks.

however I did experience a lot of pain that I felt my midwife didn't take seriously at all (again lovely otherwise) but she was very dismissal of any worry I had (which wasn't a lot!), I ended up going into the triage assessment clinic at my hospital and they informed me I had a bad infection and could've proved dangerous without treatment. when I told my midwife she laughed and said 'nothing like an unnecessary prescription of drugs.'

all midwives are different, but don't let that dishearten you, I went to antenatal classes with a woman suffering horrendous SPD and she said she found physio helpful aslong as you complete your homework aswell (every day at home) and wearing a band.

good luck and don't let somebody undermine you, you know your body better than anyone and I really feel for you

I guess I'm just so frustrated because I was actually going to try to do something to help myself (and I've found the spd worse the day after my prenatal yoga class) and was made to feel like it's not worth it. I think it's been starting to affect my mood as I've been a bit more 'down' the last couple weeks!!

My plan was to see how physio goes, then get a recommendation for a chiropractor at yoga if physio doesnt help. But now feeling like it's hopeless!!

Honestly, not that I expected it all to be bliss, but I'm still sick sometimes, have developed anaemia that won't shift and this spd and it's just really starting to affect me. Oh and like many of you, I don't really sleep anymore! So things could be far worse, but they're just bad enough that no one (medical) cares and so nothing gets better at all.

This is not ok and NOT normal!!!

Certainly not 'normal'! I am almost 32 weeks and walking just fine, a little stiff sometimes and uncomfortable but certainly not immobile or in large amounts of pain.

I just had a pregnancy massage with a specialist pregnancy masseuse, so might be worth looking privately at that too. She did a lot of work around my hips and lower back and gave me a lot of tips and positions for alleviating discomfort, etc. She does a lot of work with women with SPD, etc.

Sorry you're having such a rotten time x

I see you've mentioned a chiropractor. I saw one at the end of my pregnancy after suffering horrendously and, while he didn't make it stop hurting, it made it bearable. You do need to go back every couple of weeks though, and be comfortable with someone touching your pubic region (over clothes).
That and co-codamol are the only things that got me through.

Have you thought about seeing a chiropractor?

I work at one and we specialise in helping pre and post natal women.

Sorry you are having a tough time OP

Apologies, I see you have posted about seeing a chiropractor x

Chiropractor was the best investment for me. The midwife I saw said there was nothing that physio could do because I'm pregnant and I spoke to my occupation health physio who sent me leaflets that basically described my pain but didn't suggest anything to help. A friend recommended a chiropractor who specialises in pregnant women and honestly I practically crawled into her office the first time I saw and I walked out significantly better. I'm 36 weeks and have seen her every two weeks since about week 22. Turning in bed at night is still somewhat painful but actual day to day movement is so much less painful. I hope you manage to get some help!

Yes, a resounding vote for pregnancy massage, with a therapist specialised in SPD/sciatica/pregnancy!!! Even if you need to go private, it's the best investment you can ever spend money on.

I got sciatica at 31-32 weeks which was late enough for most people to shrug and dismiss it as a "suck it up till birth" problem. My doctor's wife suffered from similar issues much earlier on so he knew how debilitating it can be and sent me to a private physio. After 2 sessions the pain was gone and my quality of life in the last 4 weeks has been incredible...I don't take any moment for granted where I can sit up normally in bed or get out of a car without pain.

Exercise based physio or yoga was less useful for me. I tried all kinds of stretching exercises from YouTube and the relief was mediocre and very short-lived for the amount of effort you put in. And selfishly, if you're already in pain, off-balance, anemic, having constant nosebleeds, tired and constipated, the last thing you feel like doing is getting up and contorting yourself into weird positions. Massage is passive, you can really relax and enjoy it...one of the very few moments of comfort during the third trimester!

Best of luck and hope you'll feel better soon!

Is it shite normal for 28 weeks see your GP they should hopefully be more sympathetic and some painkillers are safe although I think they become less so in the last trimester.

I had to take oramorph for the trapped nerve after a cervical stitch, I was supposed to come of it the last trimester as baby can get addicted. I didn't have a choice I had two other children at home and an elderly relative to see to, I discussed it with consultant who ok'd it.

DS had other ideas and came at 28 weeks luckily no withdrawal issues, despite some lung issues (not related to the medication) he has done exceptionally well for a 28 weeker.

I also got my antidepressant change to amitripiline as it's safer in pregnancy. It's also prescribed as a painkiller.

Medication is a personal choice but one YOU should be able to make. I had a MW who clearly didn't approve of me staying on antidepressants despite having bipolar which had led to hospitisation in the past. I wouldn't care but I was put on it by the top psche doctor in our area.

I should are the medication guidelines could of changed as DS is nearly 18 month and they are just my personal experiences

Definitely see a physio! I was on crutches from about 15 weeks. My physio was amazing, she did a manipulation which I think was called the Chicago (?!) totally freed my stuck sacro illiac issue. Didn't get pain free, but a huge reduction in pain. Also do all they stuff they tell you on pelvic partnership site. Best wishes, its not fun. But should get better pretty soon after! Morning be was almost instant.