Anyone tried for a baby very soon after giving birth? Am I nuts?

[Merrydoula]

Call me crazy...I don't know what's wrong with me but I've found myself looking at OPK strips to order so I can track ovulation and get busy to get pregnant again...I've just given birth 3 weeks ago!

What is wrong with me?! It's a very overwhelming feeling that I want another quickly...Please share experiences if any, I need to have an idea of what I could be getting myself into

It's hormones! It's also much better for your body and in outcomes for your next baby if you can wait a little longer, it means your iron stores etc will replenish and reduces the chance of prematurity and other issues. Here's the cohort study that suggested 18months plus is lower risk - I've also seen somewhere that it's good for development to have a slightly bigger gap as you have more scope for 1-1 time.
That said, babies are born close together and do very well too, so especially if you are older and / or have a lot of family or paid support, you should do what is right for you
news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4918662.stm

I have 11 months between my last two, and my pelvic floor is fucked from two pregnancies without a chance to recover. Also my mental health suffered, and I think it was a real shame for my baby that I was completely unable to enjoy his first year, as I was so ill. I was also unable to lift him for quite a while towards the end as I got big and kept pulling muscles and he wasnt walking. Couldnt lift him into his cot, or his high chair. At one point he was living in a playpen, even taking naps in it. It was actually hideous and I still sometimes feel guilty. I developed PND.
Then I had two babies together. It was just a blur. I couldnt properly enjoy any of them.

On the positive side, they didnt have any jealousy, as neither remembers the other not being around, and they are sort of into similar things at the same time. Its got easier as theyve got older, but truth be told, I think a bigger age gap is easier in a lot of ways. Mine wasnt planned. Maybe if it had been I would have been more prepared, but I wish id been able to focus on one at a time.

The outcomes for you and the second baby would be significantly poorer than if you wait for an 18 mo th age gap. Your body needs time to recover.

DD1was 7 months old when I conceived DD2. I was fortunate to have very healthy pregnancies and almost no morning sickness.
The small age gap was great, as we got through all the donkey work of nappies, toilet training, toddler taming etc in one fell swoop, and the girls liked the same age appropriate activities, so played together.
It was a lot tougher when DH died before DD2’s first birthday, but I managed to raise them alone and earn a living. They’re lovely adults now.

It's just hormones. It will pass. It's really not good to leave your hormones in charge of your family planning, because the feeling can just pop like a soap bubble, but the baby won't.

Seriously, make sure you are using reliable contraception, even if you are EBF. It's much better for your body and the next baby to have some space between pregnancies.

I had this immediately after my first baby.

For me it didn't pass until I was pregnant with my second baby but I left it 4.5 years.

The very second he popped out I was thinking about having another one!

Didn't mean I didn't enjoy every second with him though, I simply knew I would do it all again!

@Babdoc How awful to hear! Very sad...But you are amazing for raising them alone xx

@ThisUsernameSucks OMG I was pregnant through the heatwave too, hated it!!

If you are able to plan, there's good evidence that allowing at least 12 months, ideally 18, before TTC is best for mum and baby. For example, there's a higher risk of prematurity for babies conceived within a year of giving birth.

Also, wait until your newborn grows and starts moving and eating, needing proper naps, and otherwise needing lots more input and work. Plus generally becoming delightful, enjoyable, and interactive, and you might find that squashes any urge to conceive another one at least for a little while.

Small age gaps are amazing!

Your body needs to recover between pregnancies. It’s for your own sake and the sake of your next baby. I thought i’d be ready for another and i’m really glad now my periods didn’t come back until dd was 11 months!

I have a 13 month gap between my boys. Have to say it's great. As others have said they've never known anything different, are into all the same things at the same time, they're very close and when we got rid of buggies, nappies etc we didn't have to go back to them. Not for everyone but absolutely worked for us.

My mum has a small age gap, she ended up having a massive breakdown with the second - having babies is a hormone driven urge at times and like any other urge, it’s not always in your rational best interest! You need a year, at least to fully recover.

I do remember feeling this, you look at the lovely baby, you want to have 10, then the baby wakes you up every 2 hours for weeks and you eventually realise you wouldn’t cope yet!

I'm afraid I think it's likely to be your hormones too. If you are keen for a small age gap in theory, then do a pros and cons of waiting v ttc. Don't underestimate the physical toll of pregnancy and birth on your body. Factor all of that in to your decision. A small gap is really hard work in the early days, but probably pays off in the long run. But you have to be prepared for a couple of tough years, with very little in reserve physically or emotionally.

I felt like this, was crazy! But I think it was just hormones as it passed and only now properly thinking about it when she is nearly 2 years old.

I waited a year and wish I had waited longer. I was so poorly with my second and missed out on so much. Even when I started to feel better I was knackered and huge. I didn't get to enjoy dd at all and looking back at photos she was such a cheeky monkey and a delight. She's 16 now and it's gone by so fast. Enjoy your baby because it's time you won't get back.

2 years apart was still hard! Your body needs to recover both physically and with vitamin and mineral stores - waiting until at least 6 months before considering trying is far better for you

Yes I’m past the baby stage now and at the point where I have to call to mind the lovely baby memories - if you’re not planning 10 of them, what’s the rush? Enjoy each one as a baby for the first couple of years

3 weeks is nothing you're in a lovely newborn bubble! Give it until 4/5 months and come back to us I found it smooth sailing up until the 4 month sleep regression. It literally hasn't stopped since (7 months) with teething, weaning, colds and viruses. Every time we get his sleep nailed another thing pops up to take it all away again right now he's poorly with high temps and is learning to crawl all of which keep him awake at night!
Enjoy this baby first before you throw another into the mix, they change so much so fast and you would miss a lot of it with another baby to look after! Hormones are powerful things.

I think it's missing the feeling of being pregnant, with hormones thrown into the mix. Despite having pregnancies that weren't brilliant, I still missed my bump after birth.

@myotherbagisgucci oh snap! DD1 turns 1 in 2 weeks and DD2 due early-mid Feb!

OP, it's definitely the hormones. I was desperate for another baby as soon as I had DD... managed to wait a whole 5 months before getting pregnant again 😂

I had twins and then was pregnant before they were 2. When DC3 was 6. Weeks old, honestly I would have definitely had another.

It was all hormones. I think take it as a sign that you are managing becoming a mother well and will probably be okay to have another but honestly there is no rush. Enjoy your baby, give tour body time to recover and see what happens.

We wanted 2 under 1 so we started TTC casually a couple months after DS was born but then started properly TTC around 4 months later. Even stopped BFing. 14 months later and we are still TTC our 2nd DC. Looking like we might be lucky to get a 3 year gap now!

Anyway. Feel awful that I selfishly stopped BFing DS so early now. Wish I spent more time focusing on him rather than charting tbh. But then maybe if we had been lucky straight away I wouldn't be thinking like that, idk.

Merrydoula Hahaha I was the exact same!! Pregnant through the heatwave this year, induced dye to pre-eclampsia and kept in for a week after!!

Btw, my DD is 5 months old and I am nearly 3 months pregnant... planned, even though my last pregnancy was horrific start to finish.

Almost no symptoms this time, yayyy!!

I'm really excited, even tho everyone says I'm crazy 😁 xx

I have a 4 month old boy and I'm 3 months pregnant, was a surprise but me and my husband knew we wanted 2 kids