Breastfeeding or formula?

[emilyanne96]

Hi everyone, so I'm 23+5 now and I've so many questions?! Did you all breastfeed? I think I wanna try it but then I'm wondering do you still buy formula? How does mixing it up and doing both work? I obviously want my partner to be able to feed baby too and I've heard it can be very tiring and demanding for mum.
We have bought bottles but not formula as I was unsure how to go about it all. It's all so confusing and there's so much to know that I never even thought about until now when I'm unable to sleep and my head is spinning!!!

Any comments/advice would be amazing and so appreciated I'm sick of reading books I need to hear proper experiences haha!

I bought a couple of small bottles of premade formula just in case and I’m glad I did as my ds really struggled with bf. I combination fed for ten weeks then switch to formula. Best to be prepared and do the right thing for you and your family

I BF for 13 months. I am glad and proud that I did it. I never experienced any pain and baby didn't latch for 3 weeks. It was a lovely experience and so convienent.

Negatives: baby fed often - totally normal but totally demanding. Baby has only just started sleeping through at 13 months. I was totally exhausted. I went back to work at 9 months so expressed often for the day feeds. I found the whole experience beautiful yet stressful.

My personal opinion is that if I had another child, I would BF for the first few weeks and move to formula.

I fed dd formula- she wouldn’t latch to the breast as a newborn and I just panicked in the hospital and moved to formula instead of sticking at it. I don’t have any regrets other than curiosity of what breastfeeding was like.

We didn’t find FF inconvenient at all- we had self sterilising bottles and a perfect prep machine so it was v straightforward. I also think I would have found the pressure of being the baby’s only source of food very stressful, but that is totally personal.

I’m pregnant again and I’m weighing up whether to try to go for exclusive bf again or not. I’m thinking of giving it a go (mainly because of the reduction in breast cancer risk for me) but if it doesn’t work out or if t proves difficult physically or mentally, I won’t hestitate in moving to formula.

I formula fed #1 and breast fed #2 for 16 months.

If I could do it again I would try to mix both as I mostly loved breastfeeding but found it mentally and physically exhausting being solely responsible for her wellbeing as she wouldn't take a bottle at all.

Both methods have their pros and cons so you have to weigh up what's best for your family.

I found breastfeeding rewarding but it does take some work to get it right, its new for you and your baby, so you are both learning. I would say get some formula in just incase but dont be put of as the first few months can be tough but it is worth it if you can manage. But do not ever ever feel pressured or put pressure on yourself, if you need a break take one, give your baby a bottle of formula and let dh take over for a bit, if you can manage to pump a little that will help keep your supply up and allow dh to feed the baby whilst you perhaps get a soak in the bath. Breastfed 4 babies for around 6mths. 100% do what is best for you and your family.

If you really want to breastfeed (and don’t live in the middle of nowhere) I would advise against buying formula in advance. Breastfeeding is bloody difficult to start with and if you have formula hanging around at home, you’ll likely find it really tempting. I’m an emergency your partner could run out and get some. It’s all much the same so whatever your local shop sells is likely to be fine and is probably the best brand to use anyway. If you can avoid using formula for at least the first few weeks to establish breastfeeding first, this would be better.

Personally I think if you can breastfeed, it is a million times easier (one you’ve cracked it, to start with it can be really hard) than faffing about sterilising bottles and mixing up feeds, and so much more convenient on the go. There are loads of alternatives that your partner can do - nappies, baths, playing, reading stories, cuddling etc.

Thank you everyone your comments have made me feel a little better i was thinking maybe trying both but then where does the breast milk go when you don't feed baby? I'm going back to work after 9 months too so I don't want to breastfeed the whole time if that makes sense x

Most of the milk a baby drinks from the breast is made at the time of feeding, rather than stored in between. If you breastfeed and miss a feed you can get engorged and uncomfortable and may need to express to feel better. It's important to be aware though, especially in the early days, that your body has a feedback mechanism which recognises if the breast isn't being emptied as often and reduces milk production. So if you start giving formula there is a chance your own milk supply will drop. It is possible to mix feed successfully with one or two bottles of formula a day, but you need to be aware of the problems that may occur.

I breastfed DS and never used formula - he wouldn't take a bottle so it was not really an option! Went back to work at 9 months and continued to feed around shifts (including a lot at night initially, which was HARD) until he was 2. By the time he went to nursery he was eating food reasonably and would drink water from a cup but despite their best efforts he never drank any kind of milk from any kind of bottle!

I’ve never bought any formula in my life.
I approached it attitude that this was a task my body was designed for and just got on with it. A few days discomfort and bleeding nipples whilst we both got used to it. A few block ducts sorted with additional feeding and warm flannels but otherwise it was so, so much easier than formula.
It’s cheaper, no additional equipment is necessary, it’s a constant supply or perfectly made and warmed milk created for your baby, there’s a much lower infection risk so far fewer episodes of diarrhoea and vomiting, immunity is passed on to many common diseases and protects the infant until immunisation and beyond. Asthma risk is lessened. Obesity risk is lessened. Why would you not?

Post above about feedback is good. It takes a couple of weeks for your body to adjust to the demands. Mixed feeding can be problematic as the plastic test is a far stronger stimulus and can interfere with breastfeeding if introduced. Top ups can also interfere with the feedback mechanism and reduce the supply of milk rather than provide more nutrients. Expressing is better than formula.
You may feel once you start that you actually don’t want your husband feeding your baby. I coveted those beautiful moments of stillness and closeness. I wouldn’t have handed my young baby to anyone to feed.

If you feed for six months you’re doing better than the majority. You can think about mixing feeds after that as part of weaning.

Nutritionally breast milk is best (fact, not formula bashing) but that's not the full picture and you have to look at what is going to work for you and your family.

If you genuinely want to breastfeed then don't buy formula. You'll need to persevere. In the first few weeks just expect baby to be surgically attached to your boob. Except them to cry and thrash about at the breast, feed for 45 minutes then want more. This is all normal. It doesn't mean you don't have enough milk or you aren't satisfying baby. It's how they stimulate your milk supply, it does have just happen. Also, your milk will take 3-5 days to come in. This is normal. Baby will manage on colostrum until then, which you probably won't see as it comes in tiny amounts. Then one day BOOB! Rock hard tits! Breastfed babies generally lose more weight than bottle fed- up to 11% (10 is considered acceptable but based on formula fed babies).

I breastfed DS, and hated it. I'll be formula feeding this one. Sometimes, whard nutritionally best, isn't what is overall best!

As for mixed feeding, some babies don't. They'll just accept one or the other!

Why would you not? Well, I can give you a dozen reasons I won't be this time, but I suspect you aren't really interested.

I did a combination of bf and formula (ebf then combi then formula ... a few months of each) ... that worked for us so I could get some sleep and husband lived feeding them too

Don't feel pressure to do anything you don't feel ok with- so much pressure to stick to bf and stupid comments like you ha ent bf if you've not done a full 6 months etc ... 🤬🤬🤬 or 'I'm so proud bf for 10 years nonsense - do what works for you

CherryPavlova-

I’ve never bought any formula in my life.

it was so, so much easier than formula

So having just said you’ve never used formula, you’re still an authority on what’s easier?

There’s plenty of actual benefits to breastfeeding and going down the “FF is such a faff!” when you’ve never actually done it yourself makes me question the rest of your points.

DS is 5 months and EBF. I expressed while pregnant and had a big stash of colostrum in the freezer which helped me feel totally positive about being able to fed him.

It took some time and you can’t start until about 35 wks I think. First week I only got a few drops but after a couple of weeks a could express enough to fill a whole syringe. I stashed enough to feed him for a few days so if anything happened he would have colostrum.

Ask your midwife about it.

I think it really helped my suply and made me feel more confident the first times I fed him.

This also ment I didn’t need to buy back up formula.

I LOVE breastfeeding, yes it’s all on me to feed him but I think I’m spoilt because I get that time with him and that connection.

I really love breastfeeding. There are some downsides (it was painful in the first week and I do all the feeds), but tbh if I wanted my DH to do some feeds I could just express.

It’s the best milk for my baby and I also love the feeling of feeding her. It’s kind of amazing looking at her now at 8 months and thinking I’ve basically grown her to this size! I didn’t buy any formula in advance as I was determined to bf but also knew the early days could be tricky so didn’t want the temptation. If you want to mix feed it’s best to wait until after 6 weeks so your supply is established. Also most people I know who have successfully combi fed have only done one bottle of formula a day as again it’s harder to maintain supply with more than this.

PennyMordauntsLadyBrain Massive assumption going on. I have never bought or fed mine artificial milk. That doesn’t mean I’ve no experience of formula feeding. Ive probably fed upwards of several thousand babies artificial milk over the years. I can very readily compare the two.

I breastfed and didn’t buy any formula in advance (there are always shops nearby to pick some up if needed unless really rural).
Yes it can be hard work. Yes it’s tiring. Having a newborn is tiring, generally. No DH couldn’t feed them when they were babies, but he could change them/wind them/cuddle them/rock them/take them out in the sling/pram when I needed a break and he couldn’t be closer to them to be honest.
Your breast milk doesn’t ‘go’ anywhere when you’re not feeding, your supply will adjust to the demand. It’s entirely up to you how to feed your baby.

CherryPavlova - so you’ve done it at work?

So you’ve never done it day in, day out in a domestic environment, to feed your own child and to share that responsibility with your DP?

Because describing it as a faff to other women who have formula fed in the 21st century makes you look uninformed, especially when BF has so many other ACTUAL benefits.

The fact that BF in comparison to FF rates in the UK are so low would indicate that your view is not shared by the majority.

why would you not? well for me it’s because my daughter had a tongue tie and I have inverted nipples. So it was either give my daughter formula or let her starve.
She did have her tie snipped at 16 days and we persevered for 7 weeks to try and teach her to latch. Unfortunately I was showing signs of pnd by this point and something had to give.

Op, do what is best for you and your baby and do not let anyone make you feel bad for your choices!

I am bfing my 5 month old DD. I simply wanted to try it out of curiosity. The nurses in the hospital were soo anti formula that they practically forced me to breastfeed when I was septic, blacking out and had a temp of 40 (multiple lectures and even had to sign a document to say I understood the risks of switching formula?!) She has only just started taking a sippy cup. I'd say definitely give bfing a go, but don't be afraid to try a bottle and keep up with it regularly so they don't forget how to use it. It is mentally and physically draining if you are forced to be your babies only food source.

I have been breastfeeding for 6 months. I was lucky that baby latched well from the start, and I never experienced pain beyond the first 30 seconds or so during the first couple of weeks. At 6 months it is now super easy, quick and convenient. My baby has also started sleeping through the night, so ebf babies can do that.

However, downsides:

• baby won't take a bottle at all, and at times it has felt very claustrophic and life limiting. This is mainly my fault though for being complacent and leaving it too late to introduce it. Next time I would express and introduce within the first 4 weeks.

• my baby was very colicy between 6-12 weeks of age, and it was really really hard. I think this was due to me having a strong let down, and actually bottles might have helped.

Next time I would still want to breastfeed but as I said would introduce bottles earlier. Although as baby starts to eat more solids it becomes less of a big thing.

I breastfed and am still breastfeeding DD who is now 2. I'm desperately trying to stop but it's sooo hard to wean a very wilful toddler. I found the experience a mixed bag really. On one hand it was very convenient, cheap and has created a lovely bond between me and DD. She is also v v advanced for her age and DH is convinced this is due to bfing. On the other hand I found the experience draining, isolating (as all my other mum friends were FFing) and soooo tiring due to the lack of sleep. It's also made DD extremely clingy to me meaning I don't get much of a break. I'm currently pregnant with DC2 and already decided I'm exclusively formula feeding once s/he is born. Some people would say it's unfair to BF one and not the other but I know going through all that again would break me and make me a terrible mother to both children as I would be so exhausted and irritable all the time

I've had 3 (DD3 is currently 7 weeks) and mixed fed all of them, with the strong intention of exclusively breatfeeding them all. All 3 had tongue but only the 3rd had theirs divided. I had low supply with each of them due to the tongue tie and couldn't keep up, hence giving formula as weight loss was high and various methods to increase supply failed. With DD1 over time my supply became better and I was able to move to breastfeeding only for a couple of months, which I loved. Then when she cut her first tooth I moved her formula because she wouldn't stop biting. I moved solely to formula with DD2 when she was 3 months because my supply deteriorated massively, largely because I couldn't put the time I needed into increasing my supply. My eldest was already in school and so large chunks of the day were spent doing the school run which didn't help. DD3 is doing well so far but still having around 500ml formula daily. It is what it is. I have no time to sit feeding all day to increase my supply so I mix feed. I've expressed with all of mine which is hard going sometimes but worth it.

What's best for you? Go into it with an open mind. I bought some of the pre made bottles with teats for my 3rd (having had to send DH in the middle of the night with our first two) and so I'd recommend doing that for peace of mind. You don't have to use them.

I struggled to breastfeed for various reasons and started feeding ds formula which I was happy with. When my milk came in my boobs hurt like mad and I started to express using the Medela breast pump. I was surprised at how much milk I was able to express and started to give ds my milk in a bottle and have continued to do so ever since.

I now express 5 times a day for approx 15-20 mins each session with the Medela symphony electric double pump and I am expressing 25 ounces a day. I store my milk in the fridge and also now in the freezer as I have an over supply. Ds is fed my milk in his bottle which works well for me because my husband also helps with feeding which gives me a break. I love that I am still able to give my baby my breast milk and I am happy to top up with formula whenever I need to. It works for us so I guess that is all that matters.

I bf DD but only until 6 weeks old. No problems physically - she latched well, was putting on weight etc, but I found it just got harder. The constant feeding exhausted me, and I felt tied to the bloody sofa. Ended up with PND.

Switched to formula at 6 weeks and it made a difference to us all. DD was much more content, slept really well, and I was finally able to enjoy her. I put so much pressure on myself to breastfeed that it made me mentally unwell.

On the other hand, my best friend bf her 2 little ones until 13 months and 11 months with absolutely no problems. Both slept well and fed at predictable ish times after the first few weeks.

If / when I have another baby, I will definitely try breastfeeding again, but will be much more open to moving to formula if I feel that’s right.

I guess my point is, you won’t really know how things are until your baby is here. Just keep an open mind. Wishing you all the best!