Boyfriend called me selfish for wanting my mum with me when I give birth?

[Lou0219]

My OH made a huge issue over me wanting my mum in the birthing room saying he wanted it so be just me & him. Am I wrong?
Thanks

I’m having my husband and my mum at the birth. I’m lucky that my husband hasn’t objected at all but then him and my mum have a fantastic relationship.
He knows that she is a very maternal and caring woman and will instantly help put me at ease. I couldn’t imagine doing it without her help.
I understand that it is an intimate time and part of me wants it to be personal between me and him but at the same time, In the nicest way possible, my husband is useless at certain stuff.
He won’t speak up if there is a problem and he wouldn’t get me a glass of water if he thought the nurses were too busy coz he worries he’s gonna be a burden.
Your mum has been there and knows what needs to be done.
Your the one pushing that human out of your body and you need to feel strong and safe and like you have a voice. Sometimes you don’t have your own voice because your so busy concentrating on your body so you need someone who will speak up for you.
In my case I know my husband isn’t capable of that and he knows it too which is why I think he is probably quite happy my mum will be there bits support for him too x

Hmm difficult one. Your DP obviously sees the birth of your child as a shared experience for the two of you.

For context I had my mum with me for DC1 as the dad had buggered off when I told him I was pregnant. She was supportive, however she always goes in and on about how she got cramp in her foot and was in soooo much pain and constantly tells DC1 she saw him first which when he was younger made me feel a bit pushed out.

With DC2 I was with the father and it was just the two of us and a midwife. I wouldn't have had my mum there too as I had him for support and it would have just felt weird for me to have mum there at the same time, this was a special time for me and DH iykwim and I think anyone else there could have spoilt it.

Our three births were incredibly special moments for me and my wife, I just can't imagine having had anyone else there.

Thank you for all of your replies. I do understand he wants it to be me & himself. Maybe we need another conversation thanks again

You're the one giving birth and you get to choose. I don't think it's selfish, but even if it was I think you damn well have the right to be selfish about who you have to support you through labour.