Go to or cancel booking appointment after scan showing unknown viability?

[RhubarbRocks]

We went for a private scan yesterday - after 3 years of trying after a previous miscarriage I was desperate to know what was happening.

We saw the baby (tiny blob!) but they say the results were inconclusive and to go back in 10 days - gestational sac size 20mm x 4mm x 22mm (mean 15.3); volume 0.9 ml, CRL 6.5. No visible heartbeat.

This puts me at 6 weeks 3 days. But I should be 8 weeks yesterday:

LMP 10 August, and because DP was working away we only DTD when I travelled specially to see him the day before ovulation on 23 August (day 15).

I got a strong positive test on FRER and a lighter one on clear blue on 8 September (day 30).

But 6 weeks 3 days means I would have conceived on 3(?) Sept (day 25?).

So I think it can’t be possible that this is going to be viable - 10 days between being with DP and conception plus a positive test after only 5 days.

The only hope I have is that I know I have a very very tilted uterus and they made a mistake with size (it was really hard to find anything at all and they really seemed to rush it). Could that make a difference - does that ever happen? Plus I still have all the same tender breasts, exhaustion and nausea, and no spotting or cramps.

But I know that is clutching at straws and my real question is what to do now. I have my booking appointment on Wednesday - should I go and tell them about this or do I phone and cancel? Or call the GP and ask for referral to EPU for another scan before then?

So in limbo and I want to be able to grieve if it’s over - DP is convinced it is all fine (doesn’t understand the dates) and won’t let me do anything I wouldn’t when pregnant (eg I would quite like a small glass of wine tonight). I’m 43 so this is my last chance and I want to be allowed to be sad.

Sorry for the long post. Really grateful for advice on what to do about the booking appointment. Thank you.

I'm sorry you and your DH are going through such a worrying time.
I think I would still go to the booking appointment, either way you may need the support they can offer to you.

Yes please go to the book in appointment and mention the scan to the MW.
It might be that the so pnographer didn’t get a good look, that the foetus is developing a bit more slowly but still ok.
Or it might be that’s it’s bad news in which case you might need support too.

Whatever the situation, the best person to talk to is your MW.

I would contact midwives and ask to delay booking appointment until a second scan. If you arrive with such an uncertain outlook, they might even suggest that on the day.
Booking takes ages, at least an hour, and a lot of it is administrative. It can't change the progress of early pregnancy.
Sympathies, this is a horrible place to be when you just want to know for sure what's happening.

Regarding dating. It could just be that it stayed a little longer in the fallopian tubes and implanted later and/or you ovulated a day later or so but there was still enough sperms to fertilise the egg.
That's why they go from lmp and not when you think you ovulated or conceived, because each egg is different, there is an average time for implantation but doesn't necessarily mean it's the same for everybody.

So yes, go to the booking appointment, have another scan and then go from there. 6weeks is still early to see a hb for a lot of people, so there is chance still. Also, little babe could have a growth spurt, my dates were changed because of it after an early scan and routine scan.
Good luck 🤞

So sorry you're going through this. Definitely go to booking appt as pp have said. Your midwife could offer support if outcome is as you suspect and if, everything crossed, everything is fine, you might struggle to get another booking appt soon so could delay getting to know the midwives, getting referred for 12 week nhs scan etc.

I would call GP and get referred to EPU (assuming you can't self-refer). If they see the same as the private scan, they'll likely book you an appointment to return in 1-2 weeks. You can put off the booking scan until after that.

I have had several miscarriages and wouldn't go through a booking appointment in this situation. It would be a very miserable hour or so and I cannot see any way it would help you with a miscarriage, as you don't need to be booked in to deal with EPU.

So sorry. Limbo is awful.

I would call the GP and ask for an EPU referral so you can get a repeat scan. Being completely honest with you it doesn’t sound good and I think going through a booking appointment only to then have a miscarriage would be really hard. Booking can always be rearranged if needed.

Fingers crossed for you OP

Call your GP and arrange another scan at the EPU x

Similar happened with me with dc3 I went for an early scan as I'd had miscarriages previously, which by my dates I should have been something like 6+5 (if I remember correctly) I definitely 100% knew when we had sex so you was expecting it to be around that.
The scan showed I was 5 weeks exactly and I thought that it wasn't possible to be that far out and was sure I'd miscarried again.
I had to go back in 2 weeks and at that scan it showed it was 7 weeks and there was a heartbeat. I have no idea to this day what happened to the dates but that dc is now 11.

At my booking appointment my midwife was talking about dates saying they can be two weeks out people don’t understand it which is why some people argue over the dates! Hope it all works out xx

With early scans the dates can be up to 8 days out due to how the scans work.

But in this case I wouldn’t book in, I would either wait until the next scan even though it is an awful time to be in limbo. Or call GP for an EPU referral.

If you contact antenatal unit/midwife anyway they might scan you in EPU, I know my hospital won't recognise private scans. I got dated a bit earlier on one and they only go by their own scans. X

Thank you everyone for your support and guidance. I spoke to the GP this morning, who immediately phoned the EPU. They want to scan me tomorrow afternoon, so I will see what they say then.

Good luck tomorrow.

Good luck

Good luck OP. Thinking of you and hoping for a positive outcome.

Good luck today op
I had a early scan with dc4 and they put my dates back so far that according to them I wasn't even pregnant when I had my positive test but then 2 weeks later when they rescanned they could see him better and changed my date back to what it originally was.

Thank you for all your thoughts and kind words. Unfortunately it wasn’t good news - there has been no growth (if anything it is smaller) and no heartbeat. I can’t fault the EPU though - very kind and compassionate.

RhubarbRocks, I'm so sorry to hear that. You did the right thing in getting checked and going with your instinct. Sending so much love and support, with lots of happy and positive vibes for the future - when the time is right for you all. X

I’m so sorry, Rhubarb

Sorry to hear that.

I'm so sorry @RhubarbRocks sending hugs your way

Sending love to you xx

I'm so sorry Rhubarb