In two minds about having a second child?

[PasstheStarmix]

Hi, I really want a second child for the following reasons:

1. A playmate for DS who loves other children and due to his sociable personality type it looks like he’d benefit from a sibling.

1. We have a spare bedroom that is screaming out for a nother child to grace it.

1. Me and dh feel like our family would be complete with a second child and feel like somebody is missing.

Reasons I’m unsure:

1. I hate being pregnant and had a very traumatic birth the first time around. What if it’s traumatic again can I cope?

1. I’m scared, can I cope with a baby and toddler at the same time? We have no support.

1. Things are just starting to settled down with 18 month old ds, he’s been a very difficult baby although extremely lovable.

1. I’m scared having a second baby would be the wrong decision and there’s no going back.

I keep going back and forth and and myself and dh have agreed to start trying and I’m bloody terrified. I haven’t stopped taking my pill yet and keep saying I will in just one more day. Please help. Has anybody felt so conflicted about a second baby and went ahead with it? What was the outcome?

I'm 41 and it's probably too late for us now but I feel really sad about it....

My son is 9 months old and I’m 38 - right now I’m strongly leaning to him being an only child. I didn’t enjoy the small baby stage very much. It’s definitely got better, but the thought of going back to small baby land gives me the heeby jeebies. Our boy is a curious, demanding, not very much sleepy baby and the idea of him x 2 is

Both partner and I have siblings we’re close to and I do hesitate over not giving that opportunity to our son. That and the thought of aging parents on your own. It’s great to have siblings who shared the weirdness of family life with you. But... the baby stage and the fact i’m main earner hoping to make a late career change from low earning field to something higher... it really feels like only child might be the decision. Otherwise we’ll be into forties for second..

I love being an only child. Always have done. We will only be having one as well.

I was torn too. I am currently expecting my second. The thing that made my mind up was 'I wouldn't regret having another but might regret not having another '.

I had a really traumatic labour too but I'm hoping I can have a planned section this time. I feel that planning and feeling in control about that makes me feel much better.

Good luck with whatever you decide x