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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Colleague getting annoyed with my toilet habits

73 replies

HoneyMonster12 · 14/07/2018 08:22

I travel around a lot with my job on a daily basis visiting several locations. I have a work partner and we often have to make 7/8 different calls in a day which can often be an hours drive initially and then 25/45 minutes in between visits.

I’m 25 weeks pregnant and I get so dehydrated if I don’t drink 2/3 litres of water a day, however, this means I am constantly needing the toilet so my colleague who is the one who does most of the driving is getting quite annoyed. It can’t be helped but I’m now in a position where I’m too worried to ask him to stop as it often means we have to pull over and look for a toilet on the sat nav

I’m not sure what I can do, if I speak to my employer there’s not much they can do, as they can’t monitor his behaviour 24/7 and equally I’ve still got 3 on the left of working with this man so I’d rather not rock the boat!!

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Merename · 14/07/2018 08:30

Hmm. That's tricky. What about just having an open discussion with him, acknowledging that it is affecting him but explaining that there's little you can do. And asking how you can help? Hopefully taking that kind of conciliatory approach will avoid rocking the boat and also help him have a bit of much needed empathy. If he gives you hassle after that then I'd talk to the boss.

Earthmoon · 14/07/2018 08:37

The first thing I would do is get a medical check up just to see if everything is ok. If you already done that, then I would follow Merename advice.

IWantMyHatBack · 14/07/2018 08:39

Have you had a check for gestational diabetes? Are you much more thirsty than normal?

Pluckedpencil · 14/07/2018 08:53

I don't want to worry you unduly, but thirst is not a normal part of pregnancy, although obviously frequent need for the loo still is. I would definitely check that out. I know you need to drink a good amount of water each day anyway, but you could drink more in the evening at home. Are your toilet stops making his day longer and getting him home later?

BridgeFarmKefir · 14/07/2018 09:04

Hmm, I think thirst is a part of pregnancy - in fact my midwife told me that this week. Especially in this heat. BUT extreme thirst isn't. So get it checked in case.

If this is becoming an issue, and there isn't a medical problem, it may be time to have a chat with your employer about changing your role. They have a duty of care to you, and are obligated (in theory anyway) to make your working day safe and comfortable. I appreciate this might not seem possible but it's always good to raise these things.

surreygirl1987 · 14/07/2018 18:11

I don't think she mentioned extreme thirst but dehydration? It's true that dehydration is a risk in pregnancy, especially in this summer heat. I would take toilet stops whenever you need them ... If he takes issue I would say in a light hearted way 'I'm pregnant and it's doctors orders to drink loads... believe me it's more annoying for me than for you!'. If he keeps taking issue with It, say if he had an issue with doctors orders he's free to speak to HR about it. And it IS doctor's orders - medical practitioners agree that hydration is especially important in pregnancy. Good luck and stick to your guns on this!!

Original poster

HoneyMonster12 · 14/07/2018 18:15

I wouldn’t say this is extreme. It’s just where it’s hot and I’m thirsty and trying to drink the recommended amount! The midwife has already said the increased need for the toilet is due to the baby resting on bladder

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crimsonlake · 14/07/2018 18:21

That sounds like an awful lot of fluid to be drinking even for someone who is not pregnant and anyone would be spending most of their time in the toilet. Obviously the situation cannot continue as it is impacting on your colleague, time to speak to your manager.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 14/07/2018 18:25

2 to three litres is a lot of water.
One of the signs of dehydration is not requiring the loo, and producing less urine which is darker than usual.

If you are peeing loads, it's unlikely that you are dehydrated.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 14/07/2018 18:28

Your work might need to make reasonable adjustments for pregnancy, but they do not need to adjust for someone who is over hydrating to the extent that their toilet breaks are affecting their work.

FatCow2018 · 14/07/2018 18:31

You are drinking far more than you need, try cutting back a bit as drinking too much can be really dangerous. You only need 2 litres per day, and this includes fluids from foods that you eat also.

FatCow2018 · 14/07/2018 18:31

Your work might need to make reasonable adjustments for pregnancy, but they do not need to adjust for someone who is over hydrating to the extent that their toilet breaks are affecting their work 100% this!

SamanthaH92 · 14/07/2018 18:36

Actually you need more than 2 litres a day whilst pregnant and more when its hot or so i have been advised by MW. No GD here as far as we are aware, passed the test but babys tummy is measurring bigger than it should. I drink around the same OP in water and have the odd glass of pop on top of that.

vanillasky1001 · 14/07/2018 18:37

I think you’re being a bit ridiculous. First baby?

Bezm · 14/07/2018 18:40

If you were truly dehydrated you would not be peeing so much. People are becoming so obsessed with drinking gallons of water, it's just not necessary. In fact, drinking too much can be just as harmful a step not enough. Unless you're doing a great deal of exercise and sweating a lot, you don't need to drink so much. The NHS recommendation is around 1.2l of fluids through food and drink. Being pregnant is not a reason to drink more. I would reduce how much you drink whilst travelling, and use the loo whenever you stop for a meeting, which you say is quite a lot in a day. That way there need not be any unnecessary stops. As for the baby pressing on your bladder, it must be huge if that's the case at 25 weeks!

TheGirlWithAPrince · 14/07/2018 18:42

my midwife and doctor says i need to be drinking 3-4 Litres of water a day in this heat especially as pregnancy is making me pee more.

LB1291 · 14/07/2018 18:45

Don’t panic, 2/3 litres a day is perfectly normal. I drink at least that at the moment (39 weeks) due to the heat and as people seem to forget, the 40% extra bodily fluid you have when you’re pregnant needs constant replenishment when you’re sweaty. Just don’t forget to replace electrolytes. FYI I do not have GD.

He just needs to deal with it, or you offer to drive? X

IncyWincyMouseRat · 14/07/2018 19:07

2-3 litres per day is normal and healthy and not AT ALL unreasonable! It’s sensible to drink a reasonable amount of water during this warm weather!

My bladder is super sensitive, my mooncup used to make me feel like I needed to wee all the time so I know it’s sensitive even non-pregnant and obviously the pressure of a baby is doing much the same! I’ve been peeing constantly since about 20 weeks. I’m 34 weeks and got up 6 times in the night the other night! I definitely do not have gestational diabetes or a UTI either, some women are just more sensitive than others.

I drive for work doing community visits and will ask to use the loo at about half my stops, is that an option for you? Tbh I’ve actually considered having an emergency wee bucket in the back of the car but that obviously isn’t an option for you with your colleague!

BlueBug45 · 14/07/2018 19:37

Doctors have for years told people to drink loads if they are pregnant or have a bladder infection but research doesn't back this up and states that you should drink when your thirsty. This means measuring how much you are drinking is simply weird as you risk water intoxication (hyponatremia).

IncyWincyMouseRat · 14/07/2018 19:51

... but 2-3 litres definitely isn’t going to lead to hyponatremia.

elizastarbeth · 14/07/2018 20:30

2-3l isn't excessive at all, I drank that every day even before I was pregnant (and that was just drinking to thirst). I'm struggling a bit now because even plain water can give me indigestion.

But you should be able to go an hour without the toilet. (My baby book says you should be able to wait 3 hours, but that seems unrealistic...) Can you time when you're drinking so you're less likely to need the toilet when you're travelling? If you drink while you're in the car and not in the meeting, you could go to the toilet before you left and not need again until you were at the next location? I think that we're inbuilt to desperately need something when we can't have it - if I'm staying at a place with only 1 bathroom, I'll be desperate to go the minute DH steps in the shower.

Also, have you tried double voiding to make sure that your bladder is fully empty after you've used the toilet? That's waiting 20 seconds or so after you've finished peeing, then peeing again (apparently rocking side to side helps). Leaning forwards while you're on the toilet is supposed to help too. If you're not doing them already, try kegels to make you feel more in control.

I can see why your colleague is annoyed, but hopefully they understand! Needing to pee all the time is of the more well known pregnancy joys. At least your work partner is doing most of the driving (my back kills after half an hour in the driving seat, I don't know if you're the same).

Pebblespony · 14/07/2018 20:33

I drank a lot more than usual when pregnant and went to the toilet a lot more too. You need to explain that there's not much you can do but it's only temporary.

MargaretCavendish · 14/07/2018 20:40

Why does your colleague do most of the driving? I can understand only one of you being insured, but most implies you could both do it - do you think he already feels a bit put upon? I have sympathy with needing the loo lots when pregnant, but not being able to make it for 25/45 minutes - presumably you didn't need the loo when you left the previous location, so you can only have needed it for a few minutes when asking to stop? - does seem excessive, especially at 25 weeks.

Amaried · 14/07/2018 21:12

Have to say I'd feel really annoyed if my colleague was guzzling back water and then was detouring to use the toilet every half hour.
I'd try and drink more on your off duty hours so you are not looking for toilet every 10 minutes.

Original poster

HoneyMonster12 · 14/07/2018 21:34

The arrangement is he gets paid more (v high daily rate) to use his car and cover the mileage. That’s an agreement he has made with the company we work for, so if he was unhappy, that’s something he needs to discuss with our manager. Perhaps I’ll advise him to discuss with our manager if he dislikes it? And I could say he’s making me feel uncomfortable with his complaining and they could then maybe come to an agreement. This isn’t an excessive amount of water. It’s usuallt 2 litres a day which is in no way excessife

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