Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

39 weeks and dp is drunk

39 replies

Spanglyprincess1 · 29/06/2018 02:02

Tiny rant, I'm 39 weeks and could go at any time. DP went out tonight and is drunk, I mean dead drunk just weed in garden and needed me to help him get to bed drunk.
He also tried to use our brand new baby bath as a sick bucket!! He is too drunk to understand why I am angry at him for doing this.
I knew he was having a few drinks but didn't realise he had gone this far.
Am I right to be annoyed? Everything should be okay but if I do go into labour overenight then I worry about getting to hospital.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Ummmmgogo · 29/06/2018 02:05

being that drunk is unacceptable at any time! ew! why can't he puke in the toilet like a normal drunk? if you go into labour tonight, call a taxi xx

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 29/06/2018 02:08

Will a taxi take me? I wasn't sure if they would. Im having BH regularly but have done for a few days so it prob nothing to worry about !

OP posts:

Ummmmgogo · 29/06/2018 02:10

don't tell them you are in labour when you book it! x

otterturk · 29/06/2018 02:21

I'm not in ANY way excusing his stupid thoughtless actions.

It's entirely reasonable for you to feel upset, unsupportive and scaredy.

But... is he otherwise a good partner? Do you think perhaps the magnitude of this change in life has hit in and he accidentally got stupid drunk? If he's usually supportive and responsible I think perhaps, if he's suitably remorseful tomorrow, write this one off.

otterturk · 29/06/2018 02:22

Unsupported sorry, not unsupportive

Bowerbird5 · 29/06/2018 02:30

Oh yes, you are right to be annoyed. Sounds like the sort of thing my DH used to do.

If you go into labour is there anyone you could call? A best friend or even a friend would easily take you and be excited to be asked. If you know the neighbours well it is one of those occasions when you can ask for help. Failing that a taxi or an ambulance if needed.

I had to use one for baby 3 as DH worked away. My best friend was primed ready but her car had broken down and was in pieces at the garage. She got her neighbour to drive me to GP who examined me and said yes definitely in labour and arranged an ambulance to hospital(30 miles).
Don't even attempt to take him with you as it will make you angry and he will be a nuisance. Staff won't be keen on having someone that drunk on their ward. He will feel a right fool if he misses the birth.
Don't say anything to him tomorrow until he is properly sober and then remind quietly him how worried you were.
Good luck with the birth and I am sorry you had to experience that behaviour from him when you should be relaxing and enjoying the last few days before baby is born. Treat your self to something tomorrow.

EllieRosesMammy · 29/06/2018 02:37

Yeah you're completely in the right to be annoyed. Id kill my partner if he had done something like that. Men can be absolute idiots sometimes though x

marylandmary · 29/06/2018 03:40

I agree. Don’t say anything while he is still semi drunk and hungover. Deathly silence is worth a thousand words anyway.

Is he at work tomorrow? Wait until he’s back before you have words.

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 29/06/2018 03:52

BH have eased off again so no labour. I forgot I need to wake him for work :(
Yeah he's normally lovely so I think this was a lapse in judgement - esp ref my new baby bath!

OP posts:

marylandmary · 29/06/2018 04:05

Why is that your job? Would his job be at risk if you didn’t wake him? You’re not going to be able to wake him in a week or so, you’ll be exhausted.

MountainPeakGeek · 29/06/2018 04:35

As an aside, if he was that drunk at 2am, do not allow him to drive to work (assuming he does a 9-5 type job.) Even if he's fit-"ish" to work by then (depends on the level of responsibility involved in his job, although it's obviously never recommended to go to work hung over but if I had an office to hide in and no potentially dangerous decisions to make, I would ) he would very likely still be over the limit for driving on his commute.

fluffyrobin · 29/06/2018 05:55

If he is as irresponsible, selfish, inconsiderate and thoughtless as to get paraletic around your due date then it's going to make the start of your family life all about him and his selfishness rather than about you and your baby.

Ugh.

How anybody can set out to ruin such a life-changing and incredibly joyous event by causing anger and anxiety to the mum to be is beyond belief.

All the attention should be on you op, how to make your last few days of pregnancy happy and secure.

I suppose he's just letting you know in no uncertain terms through his actions rather than words, that this is who he is and this is how things are going to be so you get used to it rather than get angry with him.

Caribbeanyesplease · 29/06/2018 05:56

Regular event - I’d be more than having a fit rsnt, I’d be really worried and anxious

One off? I’d be upset and I’d tell him that but I wouldn’t let it fester and if he apologises then i would move on

bastardkitty · 29/06/2018 05:58

It's not okay. How many days a week does he drink? Did he agree to stay sober beyond a certain stage of your pregnancy? Did he go out or get drunk at home?

WigglyBlossom · 29/06/2018 06:04

Do not let him drive to work this morning!!!!! He will still be over the limit.

sexnotgender · 29/06/2018 07:34

Yuck, I’m not surprised you’re a bit upset.

JustVent · 29/06/2018 07:40

If it’s a rareity then I would probably let it go. Hopefully his hangover and shame are enough for him to deal with in the morning.

Perhaps he considered it a last blow out before the baby comes. Or perhaps his friends did!

It’s gross, and unpleasant and thank God you didn’t go into labour! But as long as it’s not a regular thing then hopefully his own shame will be enough punishment.

No wonder you’re seething though! Hope you’re ok.

JustVent · 29/06/2018 07:41

Oh yes PP is right, he’ll be over the limit this morning.

SoddingUnicorns · 29/06/2018 07:43

He can’t drive this morning surely?

It was selfish and very very stupid of him, he could have missed the birth of his child! Not to mention putting extra unnecessary stress on you!

Is this selfishness normal for him?

BigSandyBalls2015 · 29/06/2018 07:46

Was it footie related drinking? If he's normally fab I'd let this go.

SamHeughansLeftEyebrow · 29/06/2018 07:52

Why is football any sort of excuse for drinking to excess for anyone, let alone someone whose wife is 39 weeks pregnant. I find that utterly pathetic as a justification. A football match is not carte blanche to behave in a revolting manner. I loathe the way this country behaves around sport and alcohol.

SoddingUnicorns · 29/06/2018 07:55

I do too. DP and I are both massive football fans, but don’t drink (neither of us can hack the hangovers any more).

It’s entirely possible to be a football fan and not drink to excess.

Orlandointhewilderness · 29/06/2018 07:55

Not on op. Don't let him drive ''tis morning!

Thirtyrock39 · 29/06/2018 07:59

Is this really a big deal? In an ideal world not ideal but I'd imagine a majority of husbands rolled in drink after the footy last night mine certainly did and realistically it could be three weeks till your baby arrives - it's better now than when the baby is here or you are overdue ...first labours are looong - you'd have plenty of warning .

Undercoverbanana · 29/06/2018 08:03

Shouldn’t be driving this morning. He needs a headwobble with a baby on the way. Have a local taxi number in your phone. Do not let him drive you or baby after drinking like this.

Don’t get him up for work. You are an expectant mother, not the mother of an adult baby.

Flip

1 2