Is it normal to not like other people's kids?

[Dollydaydream97]

I understand how horrible that sounds I really do and call me a bitch I don't care! Maybe it's my hormones and being heavily pregnant by I just can't stand other people's kids at all apart from family and even then it's at a push ! I hope this don't mean I'm going to be a terrible mum! Like I wouldn't be horrible to a child or anything but I won't go out of my way to be around them if that makes sence but I do love children also🤷🏻‍♀️For example my partner wants me to go to the beach on Monday with him and his friends by because all their kids are going I've said no thankyou ? Will this pass?

Not often am I as shocked by a post on Mumsnet as I am by this one.

How so many of you can casually dislike every 2- 16 year old that isn’t your own child. You dislike all of your own children’s friends. Really?

My children’s friends are such and important part of their lives, they learn so much from their friends on how to socialise, interact, play fair, argue and make up etc etc. I couldn’t imagine having a stance where I’ve decided that I didn’t like them as an entire group. For the most part, I think they are fantastic.

This really made me laugh. I am a bit like that but yes you will like your own kids, i adore mine.

I often find that we judge our own children by their motives, and other children by their actions. So, when your own children are bratty or mean, you forgive them more easily because you know they're hungry or tired or are cutting teeth or are going through a rough patch at preschool etc etc. But when other kids are annoying, all you see is their irritating behaviour, unless you're a particularly understanding and kind perso

Nailed it

If you really don't like children, I think you should seriously consider not having any. Your children will be annoying and hard work too.

I am so confused. Why would you choose to have kids if you didn't like kids?

Really? You struggle with this concept?

I didn’t crest other children
I didn’t carry other children for nine months
I didn’t give birth to other children
I didn’t have 3am newborn feeding sessions looking down in utter adoration at other children
I wasn’t there whether other children spoke / walked / ate / giggled etc for the first time
Other children don’t spontaneously throw there arms around me and tell me I’m their “most favourite person on the planet”

I could go on and on.

But does that help?

Crest should read create

God yeah - friends of ours have an almost 2 year old. I. CAN'T. STAND. HIM. He is so wild and they do absolutely fuck all to stop him causing absolute mayhem wherever we go. I've refused to meet them now for food or anything cos he just runs arohnd cafés upto people trying to eat and even into the kitchens!!! If he got burnt or injured they'd only have themselves to blame, it's so not enjoyable being in his company. I really don't understand why they don't do anything about it!

@PleddingWanner because they love his free spirit.

It's pretty rare for me to like other people's children! I love my own two, and my cousin's kids are very cute but outside of that, really rare!

because they love his free spirit.

There's free spirit, and then there's just endangering himself!

Thankyou everyone for your honesty also! So glad I'm not the only one who feels this way! And relieved to hear I won't feel this way about my own 😂 ( sarcasm) of course I will love her I already do ! .... @pleddingwanner that sounds horrendous ! You would think they would teach him the correct way to act out in public! And yes @bluebug45 there's loving a child's free spirit then there's letting a child go wild ! If children just weren't so bad behaved and parents actually took control I'm sure none of us would feel this way but that's just not the case in today's age! was in Pizza Hut and a woman told her son to use the salad tongs instead of his hands then as soon as she walked away he threw them on the floor laughed at her back and put his hands in all the salad ! 🤦🏻‍♀️ while I'm there heavily pregnant craving cucumber that he had just out his fingers all over !

I was taking the piss. Children like boundaries.

Yep sounds normal to me

I don't dislike other people's kids but I can only handle them in small doses. I couldn't work with kids.
And if I've got any kids round at my house I am very ready to give them back at the end.

So yeah, small doses. Even family members.

Haha love how offended some people are getting on this thread!! 😂 I'm also a schoolteacher!

Yeah, I totally love my dd’s company and think she’s the most amazing and beautiful girl ever and everyone else must be as happy as me to be around her...other kids not so much to be honest! I never grew up around little ones much and I’m not too confident in entertaining them.
It’s slowly dawning on me that other people might not be as crazy about being around my dd as I am...surely not!!!

This thread is really interesting when compared to the responses on a step-parenting thread about struggling to bond with someone else’s kids.

I like the ones whose parents I really like. Most of the kids who annoy me, it's not them most of the time. It's how their parents react or don't react that gets on my nerves.

Totally normal, I love my own and don't mind her friends but can't stand most other children !

Is this the first time you are pregnant? I used to have VERY little patience for misbehaving kids when I was pregnant for the first time. Looking back I assume I felt quite vulnerable and having a child moving wildly around me felt somewhat intimidated.

Once that DS was born, and most importantly, mobile, my tolerance threshold increased 10 fold.

Now, so many years later, I assume the attachment hormones have gone down. I still have patience for my teen but the patience I used to have for young kids... is gone, no sign of it. I don’t even feel as cooing over babies, which I was doing non stop while DS was a child.

Ok so I’ve only read the first page but I’m genuinely surprised at just how many people seem to not like other people’s kids! I mean it’s absolutely fine - there is no rule of course that you have to like all kids and we don’t all like all adults..... nor do we expect to..... but I’m surprised at how many just generally don’t like kids.

I’m in the absolutely love children category, whether they are mine or someone else’s! There’s such a wonder and an innocence about them that is just amazing. They see the world in a way we lose as adults. I’m the parent who’s always happy to have a houseful if kids - if it’s always me that has the kids friends round I don’t care. I have friends who say “it’s my turn next” but never do sort anything, but I just say it’s fine - there’s no need for turns at all. We have 3 sons so often have half the streets kids here! In fact one neighbours son loves playing here he comes and asks to play because he’s bored at home and not even bothered about playing with my kids 😂 I do draw the line at thaf though!

My husband would never ever admit it, but I can tell that he REALLY does not like kids. He’s got no patience with them - although is worse with our kids than he is with guests.

OP I don’t know what sort of parent you will make, and I can’t guarantee you will like your own child. But you will love them - and that can bring a tolerance about! I hope you do find your opinion changes though. We can all help to shape the children around us’ futures just by showing a bit of kindness and tolerance. I have also told all of my children’s friends that they can always talk to me if they need help if they can’t talk to their parents, or their parents aren’t available. I have talked to their parents about this of course. I remember being unable to talk to my parents as I was growing up and bottling up so much stuff that I tried to kill myself twice at 15. Maybe if I’d had another adult to talk to my childhood would have been happier. So now I want my home to always feel like a safe place for any of my kids friends or my friends kids for that matter.

Sorry for going on!

I’ve not read the thread but I find my own children pretty annoying and other people’s children incredibly annoying!