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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Do you seriously have to drag a whole family for scan?

69 replies

Maja123 · 14/03/2018 10:05

Hi
I am pregnant and it’s always surprised me how often I see woman bringing all members of family for a scan. I took mine just for 20 weeks one to find out sex but why take them every single time? And I see the same women every time I am at hospital with their husbands, mothers, dads and siblings. Seriously? I understand that’s in some cases when pregnancy is in risk you don’t want to be alone but most of the time it’s just like being a small girl needed help all the time. (P.S I am not jealous I would hate idea to drag everyone with me).

OP posts:

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WasThatPlaceTHESUN · 14/03/2018 12:45

Agree completely with custardcream1988

OP you are being massively hypocritical for judging people that do the exact same thing that you did. The 20-week scan is for checking for anomalies and the sonographers need to concentrate, it isn't a family day out! For lots of people it won't be a 'joyous' occasion, it's an important medical appointment.

If you want your family there to share the joy, book a private scan.

Shutupanddance1 · 14/03/2018 12:53

I went for my 20 week scan with my 19 month old in tow (the horror ).. she sat quietly in the corner watching peppa fracking pig on my phone munching some snacks on her dads knee.

She’d no idea what was going on and I didn’t have childcare for the hour during the day. We don’t have anyone who lives in the same country as us and our babysitter who usually does odd nights for us wasn’t available.

Not sure i’d want anyone other than them two in the room tho.. it’s not a spectator sport

Oysterbabe · 14/03/2018 13:12

So it's ok for you but no one else?

Whycantithinkofaname · 14/03/2018 13:17

userofthiswebsite I'm not actually 100% sure about this if I'm honest she only mentioned it to me in passing 7 years ago when I was pregnant with my first and had mentioned I'd like to find out the sex at my 20 week scan which I would be getting in her workplace. Maybe (hopefully) it was a one off. Part of my mums job involves referrals for terminations as they have to have a scan first. Whether they would actually be allowed an abortion on these grounds I'm not sure? It could of course just be rumours but I would hope someone working in that environment wouldn't start a rumour like that.

BrendasUmbrella · 14/03/2018 13:19

I've never taken my family with me. But you say you've done it once OP? Maybe the people you're seeing at other appointments are just doing it once too?

This is like the woman who posted all cross because everyone was buying up all the milk. She'd only bought an extra eight pints...

SeeKnievelHitThe17thBus · 14/03/2018 13:30

I've seen it more for private scans. We paid for a private scan at 11 weeks because the NHS one was likely to be at 14 weeks, and a woman there had 4 members of her extended family with her.

At my hospital, the scans have strict requirements of a max of 1 other person and no children so we don't get these group outings. they wait and turn up when she goes into labour instead so the midwives have to turf 4+ people out of a bay because they're impacting on other prenatal / post natal mothers.

Honey456 · 14/03/2018 13:31

I absolutely hate my NHS hospital appointments for this reason and I’m so glad we had our private scans as it is a much more relaxed environment.

The waiting room was a complete nightmare, children rolling around on the floor. Constant crying/ eating. I’m not usually someone who struggles with crowds but I genuinely thought I was going to have a panic attack!

Scans etc. should strictly be a husband/ wife thing. Like PP says it is a health appointment not a day out.

whampiece · 14/03/2018 13:32

So you are moaning about people taking family to their scans, yet you took family to your scan

Ok.

OrangeHorse · 14/03/2018 13:45

Only myself and my husband went to my scans. Would find it strange to take anyone else, even for the 20w one.

AppleFox · 14/03/2018 13:51

I think to each his own. I didn't wish they'd have some separate waiting areas for emergency scans, or inveistagive scans though.

I remember sitting in the waiting room of the antenatal clinic, waiting to have an investigative scan after finding out we couldn't have children. It wash painful. I don't begrudge anyone their happiness, but I do wish that I (and others going through it) could have had somewhere to grieve. Instead, I had to endure someone getting really disappointed that the baby wasn't the 'right' gender, and someone discussing the potential Dads.

AppleFox · 14/03/2018 13:56

Terrible typing on typing last post.

'I do wish they'd have some separate waiting areas for emergency scans, or investigative scans though'

And

'It was painful.'

Original poster

Maja123 · 14/03/2018 14:01

They are the same women. It’s like a family trip.

OP posts:

gryffen · 14/03/2018 14:04

Our hospital allows immediate family and I'm talking partner and young children and that's it.
Anyone else who comes are told to go to the cafe and be prepared for a wait. Not the first time I've seen arguments happen and the scan being delayed and appointment shifted til last thing.

Rooms are too small and the staff need space to do their checks - I'm on your side for this one.

DaisyLand · 14/03/2018 14:06

Op your 20w appointment was a family trip as well. When it was actually a medical appointment

I’ve had several scans private and nhs and it’s always been my dh and I or even just me on my own. Been loads for reduced movements and trust me a child running around was the last thing I needed when I was in worry I was losing mine.
That’s what private scans are for whilst nhs ones are for medical reasons. Would you take all your family to a gp appointment ?

Chienrouge · 14/03/2018 14:20

They are the same women. It’s like a family trip

Like your 20 week (anomaly) scan then?

laddylonglocks · 14/03/2018 14:43

I noticed this in my last pregnancy. Women bringing partner, kids and her parents to scans. Women bringing partners to appointments for blood tests.. the nurses has to keep telling the men to "sit back down, you don't need to come in". The waiting room was always full to the brim but 3/4 were family tag alongs. I felt like the odd one being alone!

LeighaJ · 14/03/2018 14:43

I've never noticed or cared how many people accompany other pregnant women to their scans tbh. Not really any of my business either.

Besides my husband accompanying me to scans, we invited his Mum to the 20 week scan.

His family also chipped in for a private BabyBond 4d scan as a gift and for that scan in addition to us his Mum, sister, and maternal grandparents were invited. My family's all in the US so just get to see the pics.

Coconutspongexo · 14/03/2018 14:49

Honey? A strictly husband wife thing? One not everyone is married, two not everyone has supportive partners and three not everyone has a partner!

coffeeforone · 14/03/2018 17:40

I certainly wouldn't take anyone but DH to either dating scan, anomaly scan or any other scan as if there was bad news I'd like us to hear it first.

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