Pregnant outside of wedlock

[ChantelleKKK]

How'd your family react if you got pregnant and weren't married to your partner?
My friend is concerned about her mum's reaction (she's 30 and dating her boyfriend). They are saving to marry and buy their own place
Any recommendations to deal with it.

WTF, you and your DP have clearly set up your finances thoughtfully and carefully to suit your situation. It makes perfect sense that you don’t need the protections of marriage. Good for you.

That doesn’t mean that the majority of people (men and women, financially dependent or otherwise) wouldn’t benefit from those protections. When some studies suggest that up to two thirds of those surveyed believe that ‘common law marriage’ will protect them in the event of a split there’s a pretty big gap in many people’s knowledge.

Told my religious mother I was pregnant out of wedlock age 19 to a boyfriend I'd never even mentioned before - first response was "that's lovely." Thought she'd had a stroke. Your friend will be fine, a baby is nearly always good news to grandparents and will nearly always be loved. If everybody in the world planned their babies perfectly to coincide with marriage and financial matters there would quickly be no babies and the human population would die. Remind her that she is only pregnant a few years ahead of her schedule and will have more energy now to deal with the baby than at a later age. No family is typical nowadays, dysfunctionality is the norm.

I come from a pretty religious family. We are in our mid to late 20s and got married last year. My mother ( very catholic) had suggested some time prior to our wedding that it wouldn’t be the worst thing if ‘an accident’ happened... she just wanted to be a grandmother!! Needless to say now we are married and expecting she is ecstatic. Yay first grandchild!

My Grandmother on the other hand is furious that we are having a child as we didn’t have a ‘proper wedding’ by this she means we didn’t get married in a church, we had a civil ceremony (that she attended under protest). So I guess it just depends on how religious they are!! I’m sure my grandmother will come round in time, it’s not the first time she’s been furious, us buying a house together before being married was another big bear!