My 12 week scan is tomorrow and my anxiety is causing me so much upset

[Miajesse97]

I need someone to try and reassure me that everything will hopefully be okay and I need to relax. I have my scan tomorrow and I just have this feeling they are going to tell me there's no heartbeat? I don't know why I feel this way as I had a scan at 7 weeks ( due to cramping) and they found a fast strong heartbeat and I had my bloods taken the Friday just passed as I'm having backache and cramps around front and they said my hcg levels are still high and where they need to be. Does that rule out the baby not being alive? I know I probably sound crazy but I have all these thought going through my head😥

Unfortunately there's no way that anyone can tell you for certain that everything will be fine however in all likelihood it will be. It's natural to worry about the scan and there will be plenty more worry to come during the pregnancy and parenthood! Try to distract yourself and not think about it too much as you can't change anything. I hope it's all fine and you have a positive experience at the scan

Not to mention I am also 13 weeks today but due to them busy busy I haven't had the scan yet so my anxiety and worry is added up over this past week

I just wish I could know for sure I really do I'm not prepared for the worst news😥 I think because I've been having minor cramping and backache I've been thinking the worst

I’m sorry no one can promise it will be all ok. However a healthy heart beat at 7 weeks and could blood means the chances of it not being ok are very small.

I suffered bad anxiety during pregnancy and tried to cope by myself. I was quite poorly due it after my son was born. Please speak to your midwife and get some support. You don’t have to deal with this unsupported x

I understand - I have a tendency to overthink and catastrophise things so I get it. And I had these thoughts many times when pregnant and felt sure things were wrong. But it was all totally fine.

Whether you worry or don't worry the outcome will be the same so try to relax and distract yourself.

I try to stay in the frame of mind that everything is fine and normal if I've no cause to believe otherwise. And should any problems arise I shall deal with them as and when.
Worrying about the what ifs do no good for anyone.
Infact it probably isn't ideal for baby for you to allow yourself to get worked up and anxious.
You'd be doing the best thing for your baby by trying to relax 😊
Take some deep breaths and repeat a few positive affirmations such as "I am fine and happy, and my baby is perfect" - make up your own.
Point is to try to direct your mind to only think good things.
It is natural to worry... it's what mothers do! But I'm sure everything will be alright.
And you're more than strong and capable enough of dealing with anything life brings anyway, so there's no need to worry xx
You'll be fine 😊

Miajesse, I'm also 13 weeks, and don't have my 1st scan until next week, and because of my age have a miscarriage rate over 40%. We had a private scan for that reason - we expected there to be nothing there but there was, and baby had a strong heart beat.

You're having the scan to show that bay is still there and developing. That is the job of the sonographer. No-one can say 100% that they won't find a problem, they train to do this job.

For now, think that in your mum's day you didn't have these scan appointments (certainly my mum had unexpected twins when she thought she was only having one) and mothers to be just had to take it one day at a time and presume baby was ok until they found out otherwise. As far as you know, baby is currently ok- no bleeding, pain etc. Go with that. You might find out differently tomorrow, but it's a risk you take - like crossing roads or driving the car to get to the hospital.

for now focus on something other than bump - a holiday later in the year, something on TV, nice meal for tea tonight. Some things are not in your control and this is one of them. Best of luck for tomorrow.

Everyone feels this way and most will be fine. Good luck.

Thankyou everyone I think I'm worried because I've been having back pain at the bottom and minor cramps but hospital said that's to be expected and that pregnancy itself is painful at times. But they stopped after 4 days and only come and go now. I just want the scan Over with so I can stop worrying so much

I was like this too but everything was fine. I had pain, cramping, light bleeding. A mean doctor even told me that I was likely to lose the baby, which statistically isn't even true! I was convinced that the worst was going to happen - but it didn't and it probably won't for you either. Best of luck tomorrow!

It’s natural to be anxious. I ve had a 5 week scan already and I’m worried about the 12 week one. Good luck.

I'm 16+4 and have now had 3 scans, and always feel exactly the same way beforehand. In fact the scan only relieves my anxiety temporarily. Just try and stay calm - remember that worrying about it will not change the outcome so you have to assume everything is ok x

I had loads of cramps during my first 12 weeks and bleeding. My progesterone was so low I had to have injections in my butt every day of my first trimester. I remember feeling like my period was coming and having lower backache. All turned out OK in the end.

Try and do something nice for yourself tonight and get to bed early. Is there anything you like on TV tonight that will take your mind off it?

I remember thinking the pain was my baby burrowing down to make sure they had a secure grip

I felt exactly the same with all of my pregnancies and every time it was fine. I had also had spotting and cramps and even then it was all ok.. I think the worrying is natural, but its more likely that you will have a healthy baby than not. Every time I went in for a scan I told myself " what will be will be" and there's nothing I could do to change the outcome. And at least you don't have long to wait now. The fact you have already seen a heartbeat is a good thing x

Loads of what you describe is normal pregnancy aches and pains. When I get anxious, I ask myself:
Does worrying about it, do anything?
Can I change anything?
I'm sure it'll all be fine. Worrying is a normal part of pregnancy and motherhood. Let us know how your scan knows. I'll be thinking about you.

I was the same, my anxiety has been in over drive since the day I found out I was pregnant, no one prepares you for the worry. I also had an early scan for severe cramping, it would stop me in my tracks and radiate down my legs and all round my lower back, really painful! Ended up in A&E. it would wake me up at night too and I would be on my hands and knees rocking back and forward not knowing what to do with myself.
I am now 29 weeks and he doesn't stop wriggling!

Everyone gets scanxiety, and cramps and back pain are normal in pregnancy! Good luck tomorrow!

Hi OP I know exactly how you feel! I’m also 13w and have my scan tomorrow! What time is yours? Mines at 8.50 so nice and early thank goodness. I think everyone feels anxious building up to their scans, it’s only natural. I’ve also been worrying about the possibility of things going wrong and them not finding a heartbeat but trying to stay as positive as I can. Hope all goes well for you.

It's normal to worry about scans. I was so worked up before my 12 week scan (and convinced something was wrong) that I reversed my car into a wall because I wasn't thinking straight. I was sure something was wrong with the baby but it was all ok and baby looked perfect.

Try not to worry about the aches and pains. With both pregnancies I had a lot of growing pains and low back ache. The pains I had were like period cramps but at the sides of my uterus rather than the middle. The back ache worried me a lot but, again, it was just normal growing pains. Pregnancy can be very uncomfortable/painful at times.

Miajesse - the heartbeat is a good/solid sign and chances are very slim there is a problem .

However, the worry doesn't stop - the. It's the big 20 week anomaly scan, the final scan, the birth going Ok and the CONSTANT worry over your baby's health and development and toddler (where I am at) and then teenage years and my mum still
Worries after a long car journey at 38 years old.

What i am trying to say is not to be negative but for you to differentiate whether you
Need some help as it only continues and gets worse the worries. However it is also norma to have anxieties and I certainly do. I'm At the top end of normal but only you
Will know how bad it is for you.

Good luck with the scan- it will most likely be fine as will all the other times too. That's the thing, anxiety is not very reasonable!!!

I was like this throughout my whole pregnancy unfortunately. Once the scans were out the way, I started worrying about movements.
I remember waiting for my first scan adamant that I'd lost the baby. I hadn't and he's now a healthy 5MO.
I'm amazed I'm pretty chilled out now he's here- must've used up my anxiety during pregnancy!

Obviously you won't know until you have your scan, but as you've already had a positive one, the chances are you'll be fine.

Lots of luck with your pregnancy

Ah! Commented on the wrong post! Ignore my last comment! Sorry

Thankyou everyone for all your lovely comments my anxiety is the way it is as I have a anxiety disorder and have been on medical since I was a child but I was told to stop medication now that I am pregnant. ( told by doctor? As I was on a high amount) it's all in my head unfortunately when I get something in there it stays put. And I reading about missed miscarriages breaks my heart and just convinced me that's what I've had I honestly don't know why I feel this way. Just keep thinking I saw the heartbeat and my bloods showed hcg levels where they need to be Friday just gone so hopefully that's enough hope to go on. I'm so glad ( in a nice way) that people have been having the pains I have also as it puts my mind at ease just a little. This morning I was crying with panic and now I feel a lot better so thankyou everyone.
Jenny- I have my scan at 10.20 but have work in the morning as I'm a carer so hopefully that will pass time hopefully it goes well for you