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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

When did you tell your work you are pregnant?

73 replies

PinkyPromise77 · 03/01/2018 09:58

Also just curious... if any of you had to tell work earlier than you wanted due to not feeling well or any appointments?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

chocolateiamydrug · 04/01/2018 05:22

after the second scan (irrc I had it at 21 weeks) with DC1 and at 6 weeks with DC2 (was awfully sick and needed regular puke breaks so had to come clean early)

EastDulwichWife · 04/01/2018 10:45

I told my boss at 8 weeks because I was struggling with the commute so he changed my days and let me work from home whilst I was feeling shitty. Told the rest of my team at 12 weeks after I had had my scan. Now 19 weeks and there wouldn't have been a hope in hell of holding out till 20 weeks - it's so obvious.

I don't understand the reason to wait tbh. You're protected as soon as they know you're pregnant, so I wouldn't risk an employer guessing and being able to sack you.

PurpleTraitor · 04/01/2018 12:58

I wait until 24 weeks because if I’m 24 weeks I’m going to have a baby, come what may, and qualify for maternity leave and pay. So it becomes their business. Prior to 24 weeks that’s not true, so I try not to acknowledge it.

MeadowHay · 04/01/2018 13:10

I wanted to wait until at least getting the all-clear at the dating scan, but I got HG and after a week of self-certifying it became clear I was going to need longer off work and get a GP fit note so I had to tell them as the fit note would tell them anyway and pregnancy-related sickness needs to go down on your records as separate from other sickness absence and gives you more protection. I was only about 6 weeks, but I asked my line manager not to tell my team so he just told HR and his manager. I'm 16 weeks now and due to go back PT on a phased return to work from Monday and I assume my team still don't know so looking forward to breaking the news to them, I imagine they will be quite shocked .

RandomUsernameHere · 04/01/2018 13:19

My immediate boss who I am very good friends with - after 12 week scan.
Everyone else (like line manager and HR) - 16 weeks.

Clevs · 04/01/2018 15:05

I told them after my 12 weeks scan. I'm a paramedic so my job involves heavy lifting and exposure to acutely ill people. I swapped a shift for my 12 week scan without telling them what it was for, then as soon as I knew everything was ok at the scan I told them and they took me off my nightshift that night.

Original poster

PinkyPromise77 · 04/01/2018 16:46

I wanted to book the early scan just to make sure all is fine... 12 weeks is such a long wait :) I will probably tell them sooner as I already been feeling slightly nauseous and don't want them to think I'm slacking if I can't make it first thing in the morning :) I am just worried that that my boss who I will have to tell is a massive blab lol and my worry is everyone will soon know as well...

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FirstMumToBe · 04/01/2018 16:51

7 weeks and that wasn't out of choice, I had booked time off to go on holiday and then the day I was due back in I had my booking in appointment with the hospital midwife so had to take that day off to. Thought it would be more beneficial to just let my boss know what was going on! It played in my favour to be honest and I was glad I did!

LisaSimpsonsbff · 04/01/2018 19:51

I'm going to well work after my 12 week scan (which will actually be when I'm 13 weeks), all being well. We're doing a lot for planning for the second half of 2018 and I feel a bit guilty not telling them that I'm going to throw quite a big spanner in the works...

bubba20 · 05/01/2018 18:39

Bellamuerte
That's horrendous!! They sacked you?! Wow!
I'm dreading telling my work for this reason! I work with a bunch of blokes, totally work focused, no sympathy, don't like sickness or slackers, basically you're their to do a job and that's it! I'm so worried. I have 3 appointments coming up in the next month and struggling for excuses so soon after Xmas, my first scan is booked the day of some really really important training, god knows how I'm gonna get out of that one!!

Original poster

PinkyPromise77 · 10/01/2018 07:33

I’m torn what to do really... I really like my bosses and I know they are very pro family etc even with only statutory maternity so was feeling it feels like cheating not telling them earlier to give them as much time to prepare for me being off as I’m in a stand alone job 🙈

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ChristmasAccountant · 10/01/2018 07:53

11 weeks with my first (as they asked me!) but was handy as I didn't need to take holiday for the 12 week scan.
17 weeks with my second, didn't feel the need to tell them earlier and was worried how they would react. I worked with a set of blokes who didn't pay any attention or notice anything so I probably could have got to full term without them realising!

redjoker · 10/01/2018 07:56

10 weeks as needed time off and people kept trying to schedule meetings with me and I had no valid excuse!

Bibijayne · 10/01/2018 09:36

Work know - I'm 5w. But I was getting really nauseous and tired and figured this way they'll know why and be understanding.

claire7930 · 10/01/2018 11:34

I've had to tell my boss, last week when I was about 5 1/2 weeks, because I was due to work an event at the end of January which would mean flying to France & working five 18 hour days on my feet, so I had to excuse myself from that - I also need some CVS genetic tests at around that point so need to be in the country really. He was fine, we've agreed to talk again once I know everything is OK, but that could be a while longer!

Kitcat159 · 11/01/2018 01:12

7 weeks because I had (and still have) horrible sickness.
Told family at 11 weeks.
Currently 12 +5

Girlwiththearabstrap · 11/01/2018 07:29

I told my immediate boss at 8 weeks - wasn't sick or tired or any thing, I just felt like I needed someone who knew at work. I'm not sure why as I didnt feel like that last time. I then had quite a big bleed at 10 weeks and had a morning off to go to EPU so it was helpful that someone knew instead of having to explain and ask for time off.
I told my head teacher at 13 weeks after my scan, and other people Im close to at work. Everyone else is just slowly figuring it out as I get bigger (24 weeks now).

Bellamuerte I'm sorry you had that experience. What was their official reason for letting you go? Given the order of events I'd be surprised if you didn't have the rights to go to a tribunal. Have you been to CAB or Acas for advice?

Original poster

PinkyPromise77 · 11/01/2018 09:50

I will have my early Scan soon so I thought of telling them as soon as I know All is ok but feeling so tired and got slight nausea is not really helping with concentration 🙈 so maybe if they know they will be more understanding? I also thought the more notice they have the better we can plan my maternity and if there is a need to get a cover etc...

OP posts:

Peanutty86 · 11/01/2018 13:54

I told my direct manager at 11 weeks because we had 2 appointments come up. He's a father of 5 and family comes first, I cried when I told him as I felt I let the team down (stand alone job too, so need to find replacement soon!). He promised he wouldn't tell anyone and he didn't.
Funnily enough I just had a call from him (I've been off for over a week with a virus) and he's been very supportive and asked me for permission to talk to HR about what steps there are to take with regard to maternity leave etc. (I'm the first person in our UK branch to be pregnant and we're only a small team so no one knows....)
It'll all be fine. Do what you think is best for you.

field10 · 11/01/2018 18:08

I had to tell them straight away as I worked in a prison and came into contact with drugs in my daily duties.

BrutusMcDogface · 11/01/2018 18:25

I'm 13 weeks and haven't told yet but will do tomorrow, I think. They do need to know but they have plans for me this year and I'm dreading telling them, tbh.

Kmackerd · 11/01/2018 18:28

My boss asked me around 7 weeks because we had been on a buisness trip to Paris and I kept making crap excuses as to why I couldnt drink any wine. I told everyone else around 20 weekish when I started to show.

heartyrebel · 11/01/2018 18:30

22 weeks when I started to show.

INeedNewShoes · 11/01/2018 18:37

My boss is a good friend and knew from very early on because of that but also because I was having fertility treatment and I needed flexibility for that often with very little notice so she knew when I had each attempt!

I didn't officially tell work until 22 weeks. I'd had a series of losses so wanted to get through the anomaly scan before letting people know.

Ohhgreat · 11/01/2018 18:38

I told work this week! I'm 22 weeks Friday, wanted to get work through a really stressful time before I dropped that bomb on them!

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