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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Taking 2.5 DD to 20 week scan

39 replies

mrssmith1415 · 21/12/2017 04:41

my 20 week scan is today. My mum was originally going to watch our dd but tonight she has been sick 3 times (the latest one was due to drinking too much water) so now I’m really stuck on what to do! Ideally best solution for us would be if we could take her with us as the scan falls in her nap time but the hospital has a no child policy and if she’s been sick I don’t want to be taking bugs into the hospital. I’m really torn on what to do. At all our previous appointments there’s always been children in the waiting room but I don’t think they go in with their mums. In theory DH could wait outside with her but this is his baby too. And then there’s the factor of what if there’s complications? Really not sure what to do.

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Original poster

mrssmith1415 · 21/12/2017 04:44

Forgot to add, my mum actually had to cancel earlier as she now has somewhere she needs to be at the time of the scan so there’s not the option for her to come and sit with my lg.

OP posts:

Prusik · 21/12/2017 04:46

I've had to ask DH to stay with Ds for my scans. It really does suck. Unless you have a neighbour who could babysit for a.tenner?

Original poster

mrssmith1415 · 21/12/2017 04:53

It’s so frustrating! Obviously she can’t help being ill but it feels like we have waited so long for today! One of my friends did offer to have her last night but this was before the sickness started and she has a 1 year old so I worry that my dd could pass it on. I’m really hoping that the hospital can make some sort of exception but it’s the risk of her passing anything on....but I’m not convinced it’s a bug as she has no other poorly symptoms just sickness that seems to have stopped now which would be a similar scenario to someone with morning sickness which they must have in that department all the time...

OP posts:

Waitingonasmile · 21/12/2017 05:06

I would leave DH at home with DD and go alone. It's a shame he will miss it but that's the most logical option. I attended all my scans alone this time for similar reasons so not suggesting anything I haven't done myself.

Good luck.

Prusik · 21/12/2017 05:07

Ah I misread, I thought your mum was ill. When I was earlier in my pregnancy I caught a sickness bug and passed it to DH and Ds. I don't think it would be wise to risk passing it to someone just before Christmas, especially someone who is pregnant.

Jigglytuff · 21/12/2017 05:09

You’ll have to go alone. Please don’t take a vomiting child to an antenatal appointment! Or if you want someone with you, take your mum.

Whatever - just don’t take your DD

Desmondo2016 · 21/12/2017 05:19

Taking dd to the hospital isn't an option. So it's find a minder or go on your own!

PotteringAlong · 21/12/2017 05:34

The hospital won’t make an exception, especially for a child who is throwing up! Ask your friend, make it clear she can say no if she wants to, and go from there.

PotteringAlong · 21/12/2017 05:36

And it’s not a similar scenario to morning sickness at all, what with your 3 year old not being pregnant and all. I know you’re disappointed but don’t try and persuade yourself it’s ok when you know it isn’t.

Psychobabble123 · 21/12/2017 05:41

Why are you even asking this?! Your child is ill and needs to be at home, not dragged to a hospital! Your DH can stay with her and you can get a photo for him. Seriously, don't be a dick and take her.

Bluebellysmell · 21/12/2017 05:41

Hospitals have a no child policy for a good reason, if they need to give you bad news do you really want that to be done in front of a small child? And then to have to cope

For this reason alone, as someone who has been told a pregnancy is not viable at a scan, please do not take your DD with you.

As for the sickness bug no, no, no, you can't risk passing that on to the others in the waiting room, and taking a child with a bug into a hospital, do you know for certain that she won't cross contaminate something that an imuno-compromised patient will later touch?

Is there really no one who could watch her? Does the sickness mean your mum can't? Especially if a portion of that time is her nap time?

If your mum can't, then yes, sadly you need to leave her at home with your husband.

OrinocoDugong · 21/12/2017 06:19

You can't take a poorly child to a hospital.

Your DH will need to look after DD at home while you go to the scan.

Whilst it's nice to have the father at the scan, it's not always possible and for you in this case it's just not.

Coconutspongexo · 21/12/2017 06:24

Literally nothing like morning sickness.
Most hospitals don’t allow children in for scans anyway let alone Ill children.

You’re going to have to go alone I’m afraid it would be really selfish of you to take your daughter with you.

ohlittlepea · 21/12/2017 06:27

You cant take her with you, infecting other people at the hospital whether patients, pregnant women or staff would be really unfair and under 5s are super spreaders of bugs. It may sound dramatic but you could cause an outbreak of norovirus. It would be so selfish to take her in. Is there any friend or family member who can come with you? If not it would have to be a case of going alone.

BertieBotts · 21/12/2017 06:43

I think you're going to have to go on your own. Perhaps you can book a private scan for your DH to see? I understand how disappointing this is but unfortunately it's the reality with two children - sometimes one of you will have to miss out.

harrietm87 · 21/12/2017 07:00

Oh please don't take her - can you imagine if she infected other pregnant women in the waiting rm? So selfish OP. Your OH can get a pic.You can pay for a private scan later on that he can attend.

MaggieFS · 21/12/2017 07:01

Can you phone first thing and try and move the appointment? I know it's disappointing but hopefully then DH can come with you. It's not fair on anyone if you take a poorly child with you.

ProseccoPoppy · 21/12/2017 07:13

You can get a private scan at a very convenient time, and private scans do allow kids if you need to take DD once she’s better - they are generally shorter too. I’d go alone to the 20 week NHS scan and get a separate private one DH can come to.

yikesanotherbooboo · 21/12/2017 07:17

You cannot take a child who has been sick in the last 48 hours to hospital.
It would be much nicer for her to stay at home.
It is true that it would be very antisocial at this time of the year to expect someone outside your immediate family to risk a tummy bug.
I do feel for you as you won't have your husband's support during the anomaly scan but really as you know, there is no option here. I hope it goes well.

flumpybear · 21/12/2017 07:20

Sorry but your child needs parental support, it's rubbish, but that's being a parent I guess so you'll have to go to the scan with someone else or alone. FWIW I'd be gutted too.
Good luck I hope scan goes well

Original poster

mrssmith1415 · 21/12/2017 07:23

Can an admin delete this post please.

OP posts:

HRTpatch · 21/12/2017 07:26

Yes dh mist stay at home with dd. No question.

ememem84 · 21/12/2017 07:29

I’d leave dd with dh. You can’t take her with you to the scan - they have a no child policy for a reason. And I wouldn’t risk taking a sick child (possibly with a tummy bug) to hospital.

I had a sick bug a few years ago and was only sick twice. But felt awful for a couple of days. There is a 48 hour rule for a reason.

Original poster

mrssmith1415 · 21/12/2017 07:34

Thanks for all the comments about how selfish I am. My mums cancelled her plans and is now having her. I feel selfish for that too but she insisted. I feel like such a shit mum right now. Sorry to bother you all I was silly to think it was an option

OP posts:

OrinocoDugong · 21/12/2017 07:37

mrssmith1415 if you want the thread deleted posting a message asking for it to be deleted won't work. You need to use the "report" link.

However they won't usually delete threads if there isn't a good reason to and there isn't a particularly good reason here. You asked a question and you got an answer.

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