1st pregnancy 2 possible fathers

[2009lisa]

Im looking for help not criticism or negativity..
Ive just found out im pregnant after being told it would be difficult to concieve because of pcos ive been waiting for an appointment to have a diagnostic lap and dye put through my tubes..
I was with my partner 10 months we were both aware of me not being on the pill and was aware of the chances of pregnancy..
We recently split and i slept with sum1 else and now stands the question who is the father??
Details... because of my pcos i never have regular periods they can go from every month to 3 months apart there is never a definite amount of time my cycle is..
I had my period on the 9th of oct then with my partner dad#1 we had sex the 18th/19th/22nd/23rd/24th oct we then ended i met another guy possible dad#2 and slept with him the 29th just the once...
I found out yesterday i was pregnant and docs saying 5 weeks and 3 days... that dont help with working out who is the dad.
Can anyone help?

Hi, personally I think it's dad 1. I'm 9 days ahead of you, lmp 1st oct... It depends when you think you may have ovulated.... If earlier in your cycle then possibly dad 1 as his sperm was there a while from so many times... Dad 2 would mean you would have caught the egg on that day or day after, ovulating on Cd 20/21... So down to your instinct of when you ovulated. Of course without DNA you won't know for sure but on a look at dates and hunch I'd say dad1.

The scan totally helped us although we knew when I ovulated and my 12 week scan was 5 days ahead. I think if you're talking about a margin of error of 2 weeks you'll be ok?? They won't be THAT of on a scan.

Just a suggestion...get a private scan. They're about £100 (owwwwch) but they might help make the picture clearer. Also you will be able to have a DNA test done (again privately) around 16-18 weeks I think???

I'm sorry you're in a tough situation. It's not an easy one. Will both of the chaps be understanding about it if you explain the situation to them both?

Thing is... whenever you ovulated is irrelevant

Sperms swim faster/slower

Implantation happens early and later

You might find out when you became pregnant to a more accurate timeframe... but that won't make who the father is any clearer at all.

With so little days in between , no scan is really going to help you here.

Simply the only way is a DNA test

Tbh OP who is the father isn't the most important thing right now. What is, is you and the baby's health. In your shoes I would come to terms with it alone as my honest thoughts would be you're likely to be doing this alone long term. In the long run it's important... but if this is a much longed for child regardless... I would just come to terms with things on your own for now. You won't show for a while and you have plenty of time later on for sorting it all out.

I know it must be hard and I'm not judging you. I've made similar risky choices thinking I would never end up in your situation. That's what infertility can do to you - change who you are and the choices you make.

I suspect you were feeling pretty low hence the recklessness... whether you're seeing that now or not, concentrate on keeping your mental health afloat and making the best of your pregnancy. You're not the first, won't be the last.

I had IVF pregnancy, i know exactly when i conceived however the 12 week dating scan, dated me 3 days earlier.
With there being only 5 days between your partners, it would be impossible to tell from dating scans.
You need a DNA test.

"So down to your instinct of when you ovulated"

She says in the opening post that owing to PCOS she has no idea whatsoever when she might have ovulated, as she has not had a regular cycle in years - anywhere between 28-84 days.

That's one of the reasons why DNA is the only way to establish paternity in these circumstances.

Actually I have realised my entire statement was rubbish!! OP ignore most of that but if you can I do think letting the fathers know what the situation is with maybe an intermediary present might be a good idea?

One poster was 100% right-you need to put you and that baby first. The men will sort themselves out in good time and there isn't much you can do until later in the pregnancy anyway about finding out. Good luck and thinking of you.

Congratulations on your pregnancy.

Pregnancy and scan dates are not as accurate if you have irregular periods. In my last pregnancy, the dates meant baby was older on the scan than my lmp date. You will automatically be checked for some stds when you go for your booking in appointment.

Pinkredrose - I thought this page was for supporting other women and not judging them, she will already know the consequences as she's the one living it , she doesn't need someone she doesn't know putting her down especially when she's had the courage to seek advice/help about her situation
2009lisa - you're not going to know for sure unfortunately until you can do a DNA test, although it may be hard for you the best thing to do is tell both potential fathers and hope that you can get support from them , try not to worry too much just think of keeping you and baby well

We have been ttc for over 2 years, we have been tracking cycles etc. I am now pregnant, but according to my 12 week scan I conceived 5 days before I ovulated and 4 days before we first had sex that month. Which is clearly impossible. So the scan is not that accurate. Only a DNA test will tell you.

Regardless of the situation you baby is a blessing you thought you would not ever have.
So firstly congratulations.
I don't have any advice apart from to just be honest with everyone.
Good luck to you in your pregnancy

Hi,I have problem figuring out who's the father of my baby . My last period started on 9th of March,and my cycle is around 31-33 days. I had sex with my ex boyfriend on March 18th and we used the pull out method. We were together for a year and we always used the pull out method ,so he never came inside of me and I never had a pregnancy scare with him even tough I know that the method is not 100% effective. Also,based on my period and cycle,I wasn't supposed to ovulate until at least 23rd of March,or even later, so even if there was any sperm in the precum,it is almost impossible that it survived until my ovulation. I had sex with another guy on March 24th after breaking up with my ex boyfriend,and he came inside me. I took the plan B pill on 26th of March,but a month later I found out I was pregnant,and realised that I was ovulating around 24th of March,so that's why the pill probably didn't work. Does anyone have similar experience,or opinion on who is more likely to be the father of my baby? And please no judgement 'cause this situation is already hard enough for me.