My feed

to access all these features

Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.


I'm fuming

31 replies

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 01:56

So I haven't announced officially yet was waiting for 16 weeks and a girl who I do not know I only know of has decided to announce I am pregnant to all her friends at a baby shower.. She found out as she seen me out shopping and seen a very slight bump. She then had the Cheek to message me and say she seen I hadn't announced but had seen me out with a suspicious bump. I said yes I am pregnant but were not announcing yet to anyone and thanked her for congratulating me. Only to now find out that shes told about twenty women who are friends of friends that I am pregnant.. So now lots of people know people I don't really know of but it's got back to me through a friend.

I'm fuming because why does she think it's okay to tell people for one and two why does she have to announce it to people I don't know only know of.. And at a girls baby shower of all places. Why is it such big news for them or interest them.

It's really peeved me off as I've been worried about this pregnancy as a ftm and also have issues with my ex partner so didn't want it getting back to him yet either.

Sorry just needed to vent Envy

OP posts:
KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 21/05/2017 01:59

She probably has very little else to talk about.

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 02:03

I just find it sad and for the fact she has a child which she had very young and then is now pregnant with her new OH. she must know what it feels like to not want to announce yet. Really upset atm I won't message her and give her the satisfaction though.

I just found out that a group I posted in about a nub theory she has seen this post and print screened it and sent it round to people. Why oh why is my life so interesting to these people that I barely know Confused

OP posts:
KingJoffreysRestingCuntface · 21/05/2017 02:15

Again, hers is probably a bit empty.

AyeAmarok · 21/05/2017 02:19

She sounds like a horrible person. Pity her. I doubt anyone she's told will think much of her for what she's done, I know I wouldn't.

Congratulations on your pregnancy; hope all goes smoothly. Flowers

calimommy · 21/05/2017 04:17

Obviously it's your choice but why are you waiting till 16weeks?

calimommy · 21/05/2017 04:18

And she sounds so little and petty I wouldn't even entertain her. I'd be very dismissive if she spoke to me again, not because I was angry but because she means nothing to me. Take the higher ground here.

CircleofWillis · 21/05/2017 04:26

I'm not sure I understand your second post. Are you saying she took a screenshot of your OP and sent it to another group you are on?

quizqueen · 21/05/2017 04:50

Your secret's out now and you only have yourself to blame for telling her in the first place. You couldn't keep it to yourself so don't blame her for not doing the same thing either!

GeekyWombat · 21/05/2017 05:08

Erm, QuizQueen, did you actually read the original post? She didn't tell her, she guessed and told everyone anyway.

Good job on the empathy though. You sound a treasure.

FlapAttack88 · 21/05/2017 05:56

Well you told a girl you only known of that you were pregnant afyer she guessed and text to ask... then she told more people. I don't reallt know why you expected so much if this girl.who is happy to text someone asking if they are pregnant? I wouldn't have even replied to that text.

Anyway.. its don't now. Learn and move on I woukd say. She probably just wanted an easy bit of gossip. Not cool and I think she has been a bit of a douche bag but she has no loyalty to you really...

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 21/05/2017 06:18

She's been horribly thoughtless and interfering. You could have held back on telling people for as long as you wanted. Recently I saw a friend walking towards x-ray at our local hospital and thought "20 week scan?" and later on saw her at the antenatal reception. Whilst I knew she was pregnant, I avoided talking to her (she didn't see me) and waited for her to tell me she was pregnant, rather than forcing it.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 21/05/2017 06:19

(I avoided talking to her at the hospital, not in general)

newbian · 21/05/2017 06:27

Sorry it happened to you but people do that. I was out with some friends at the weekend and decided not to tell as I'm just 12 weeks and I'm only really close to a few of the girls. Glad I didn't because one lady went "Oh so-and-so hasn't announced but she's pregnant, that's why she's not out tonight." Confused Some people just can't keep a secret.

Thingymaboob · 21/05/2017 08:01

You're 16 weeks and you have a bump. I think you're being over sensitive. Did you tell her not to tell anyone? From her perspective she sees you as obviously pregnant. In that anyone who saw you would know, wouldn't they? It's like walking around with an arm cast on and then getting annoyed about why people think you might have broken your arm. You told her & you look pregnant. It's normally very happy news and you can see how something like that could come up naturally at a baby shower. Don't spend anymore energy thinking about this situation.

BrexitSucks · 21/05/2017 08:43

I understand being peeved... but fuming? Why fuming, Why is it classified info? Did you need to keep it private from a boss or an abusive ex-partner. Are you waiting for an amniocentesis to clarify that you are indeed low risk for problems.

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 09:57

I haven't told work yet. I have been away or two weeks and was easy to hide prior to going on holiday with baggy clothes. So yes I have been keeping it from a boss, I haven't had results from my Edwards and plataus yet so wanted that first before telling people in case anything is wrong and also I have issues with my ex partner so didn't want him to find out yet either. (ex partner isn't father but our relationship was difficult and has caused trouble in my current relationship often so wanted everything sorted and confirmed okay before telling the world!)

I didn't tell her she did guess and yes I did say we are not announcing yet for various reasons and she went on and told people at someone's baby shower. I don't see the issue with me wanting to not announce to people until 16 weeks when things are definitely okay. My sisters have histories of missed miscarriages so I wanted to also get past the safe time or what I consider safe anyway! I think it'd just rude what they've done and wanted to vent. Thanks for everyone who congratulated me Smile

OP posts:
NotAnotherUserName5 · 21/05/2017 10:58

Congratulations Flowers

She sounds like she likes to gossip, given you'd told her you hadn't announced yet. Not surprised you are cross, anyone would be!

calimommy-we didn't tell anyone until 18 weeks as we had a miscarriage prior. Some people tell everyone straight away, some wait until 12 weeks and some wait longer. Smile

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 11:01

Thank you not another username. Similar reason for us not announcing because both sisters have had multiple missed miscarriages and at different points. It's so horrible to see and I can't imagine announcing and then having to tell everyone of your heart break too Flowers x

OP posts:
calimommy · 21/05/2017 15:57

I've had several miscarriages so I understand doing things in your own time. I was just asking about if there was a specific reason, and something which might make her more curious. What you've said makes sense especially if you have a difficult ex. I always get so fed up of my sils who think they are bloody obstetric Sherlock Holmes, constantly sniffing around me and setting off alarm bells if I don't have a drink. One specifically invited over once and served nothing but rare meat, blue cheeses and alcohol. It's very unfair because I'd already lost babies and I think it's fair enough to accept that people are waiting till 12 weeks, regardless of how happy they are for you.

OP she just sounds like she has so little going on in her life that she thinks this information is a 'great find'. Pity her pathetic-ness!

Winniethepooer · 21/05/2017 16:12

With my last pregnancy i was 18 weeks before i told anyone due to previous problems.

Op I'd send her a message & just say it straight.

Good luck with the pregnancy.

AnUtterIdiot · 21/05/2017 16:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 16:14

Thank you winnie and callie. I don't think I even have the energy to set her straight just going to ignore her and let people gossip. I'll announce when I'm ready she just peeved me off. So bloody rude x

OP posts:
missm0use · 21/05/2017 16:31

I think that is exceptionally rude of her to repeat your news, especially when it is not her news to share and she was told why you were not announcing. She is a bitch - cut her out of your life and make sure you announce to the world WHY you've cut her out!

I'm 19 weeks tomorrow and haven't announced and have no plans to do so for another few weeks. Why? Doesn't matter why it's my decision to tell the world if I even decide to tell the world!

Cuppateanosugar · 21/05/2017 16:39

Missmouse I did contemplate not telling people but our families are so excited(and want to share news with their close friends) so we will announce in our time. Congratulations 🎊

OP posts:
tabithaa · 21/05/2017 18:51

Sad times!!

I waited till just over 16 weeks after gender scan but my mum only went and told people before hand.

Don't understand why people feel the need to be such gossips.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.