I'm fuming

[Cuppateanosugar]

So I haven't announced officially yet was waiting for 16 weeks and a girl who I do not know I only know of has decided to announce I am pregnant to all her friends at a baby shower.. She found out as she seen me out shopping and seen a very slight bump. She then had the Cheek to message me and say she seen I hadn't announced but had seen me out with a suspicious bump. I said yes I am pregnant but were not announcing yet to anyone and thanked her for congratulating me. Only to now find out that shes told about twenty women who are friends of friends that I am pregnant.. So now lots of people know people I don't really know of but it's got back to me through a friend.

I'm fuming because why does she think it's okay to tell people for one and two why does she have to announce it to people I don't know only know of.. And at a girls baby shower of all places. Why is it such big news for them or interest them.

It's really peeved me off as I've been worried about this pregnancy as a ftm and also have issues with my ex partner so didn't want it getting back to him yet either.

Sorry just needed to vent

I know tabitha it is so annoying and not their news to share. Especially as I have no children yet and this is my first so it's special to us too. I'm just going to let them gossip and still announce after gender scan x

How rude! I'd be annoyed too OP. Some people really need things spelling out though, and she is either a massive gossip and doesn't care, or just genuinely didn't understand that you telling her didn't mean you didn't want the world to know.

Plus who asks someone if they're pregnant anyway? Unless they are absolutely huge (which at 16 weeks is unlikely) then that's massively rude too in my opinion. And dodgy ground. I was debating today with someone I hadn't seen for a while and turns out she'd just not lost much baby weight yet. I'd have been mortified if I'd asked her if she was pregnant!!!

I know it's too late now, but I would've just ignored her message. Not every message deserves or requires a reply. Besides, she was very rude asking in the first place. Imagine if you'd simply just put on weight from something else and were very sensitive about it. How embarrassing and hurtful that would've been. A very close friend asking? Maybe. But not what sounds like an acquaintance at best.

Good luck with your pregnancy. :)

Jeez what is wrong with people?! It's your news, not hers! I don't think you're being over sensitive at all.

Everyone has their reasons. Some people want to announce at 8 weeks, others wait a lot longer. You don't have to wait till 12 weeks, nor do you have to announce immediately after. It's your body and your baby!

I've suffered with HG and had an awful pregnancy, especially the first 4 months. I was forced to tell some people very early (manager, immediate family) by 6 weeks due to sickness, which I hadn't wanted to do. I was so ill and stressed I was worried I'd lost the baby. I had thought I'd feel better after the 12 week scan, but I found I still wasn't ready to announce it widely (thought told close friends). I had a private gender scan at 18 weeks and finally felt able to tell people then. If I hadn't had that scan, I probably would have waited until 20 weeks. The 20 week scan is a big deal, and I know other people who wanted to wait.

I can't believe anyone is saying you're being over sensitive. There's all sorts of reasons people want to keep their news quiet for a bit and 16 weeks is not ridiculous. I'd be fuming too.

And as for screen shotting your scan pic and sharing it. Well that's just bizarre behaviour. She obviously has too much time on her hands and can't keep her mouth shut.

I can't stand people taking over someone else's news. It's like recently a friend announced and posted a photo of her sisters baby, one hour after she was born! The sister was so upset. It was HER news to announce

Sorry. I'm feeling particularly hormonal today and this behaviour has wound me up! I have no advice, the cat is out the bag now - but I think you have every right to be pissed off

How thoughtless and unbelievably rude! Clearly she has little going on in her life and has to interfere with yours. Sorry she spoilt your suprise. What an idiot. Honestly if I were you (and I may be feeling the third-trimester pregnancy rage) I would say something to her and let her know this is not OK - who is to say she won't do this to more women?

Bless you OP, this would really piss me off too. My SiL has done similar things (I'm 20 weeks pregnant with my first child). She told girls in our friendship group that I was expecting before we'd announced and it did really upset me as like you I'd been waiting to tell them myself and looking forward to their reactions. Then on my birthday SiL posted to my wall wishing me a happy birthday and referenced our baby (She definitely knew we were keeping it completely off Facebook but I truly think on that occasion she just didn't think) so I then got texts from people on my bday asking if I was pregnant.... so I subtly 'announced' at the end of the day but still felt a bit miffed that she hadn't thought that through before posting. What can you do eh? !! Xx