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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

In such a confusing and difficult situation and need help please!

68 replies

PollyCazaletWannabe · 14/01/2017 09:36

According to my dates I am 10 weeks pregnant (10 + 1) but today I had a scan which showed that the baby was only measuring 6-7 weeks and there was no heartbeat, so was told that the baby had most likely died :( anyway so then I was given a blood test to determine my progesterone and HCG levels in order to make the decision about what type of medical intervention to go for. This is where it gets confusing - my HCG and progesterone levels are not consistent with the baby having died! In fact I have a progesterone level of 19 (normal range for the first trimester is 9-47) and HCG level is 52,509 which is also consistent with a 6-8 weeks pregnancy!
Now I know I didn't get my dates wrong because my LMP was on 4th November but I only came off the pill at the end of August and so I suppose it's possible that my cycle was not yet regular?
I am very confused and don't know what to think. The doc wants me to go back for another test on Monday to see if progesterone levels are rising but I am finding it hard to wait! Had anyone had anything similar happen?
In case you are wondering how I have managed to have a blood test and results already today, I am in China ;)
Thanks in advance for any or all responses

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ferriswheel · 14/01/2017 17:49

How is the limbo going? I can't imagine. This may not be helpful but I had a dull ache in my stomach prior to my scan. It actually felt 'black'. I hope you are getting through the day okay.

ferriswheel · 14/01/2017 17:50

Bump. Hopefully someone will be along to help you soon.

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 02:12

I have woken this morning (am in China so 8 hours ahead) feeling almost certain that the baby has died :( it seems so hard to be going through such a roller-coaster like this! Any other help or similar experiences, whether positive or negative, would be greatly appreciated.

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BestBeastie · 15/01/2017 06:08

I had a MMC - same kind of thing, but my dates were 3-4 weeks out. They scanned me for 10 days to check for growth in case my dates were wrong, I knew they weren't and myself and DP hadn't dtd since the BFP so there was no way another pregnancy could have supplanted a first, if you see what I mean.

To be absolutely blunt, I don't think that this pregnancy is going further if you are sure of your dates. What worked best for me was doing what you are doing now and letting go rather than staying in limbo. The doctors keep you there - they have to just in case: plenty of women do get their dates wrong - if they're irregular particularly - and implantation and early growth does vary somewhat between women. But this is an awfully long time and I would suggest impossibly long time for developmental variation. You don't have to stay there in limbo- mentally.

It's awful. I'm so sorry, but it's better to start down the path of grieving and moving forward - just by recognising and accepting that the pregnancy will - 99.9999% not progress.

Be kind you yourself. Sleep, eat, gentle exercise and surround yourself with supportive peiple. Don't go looking for miracle stories. You'll drive yourself nuts. (And I never found one that was convincingly comparable - I did search...)

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 07:18

Thank you for your reply and I'm sorry for your loss. I think you're right and there is very little chance, but I can't help hanging on to the tiniest bit of hope :(

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ferriswheel · 15/01/2017 07:37

Okay. Other stuff that might help.

My doctor recommended I wait 12 weeks til TTC again.

Have you heard of pre seed? I know it helped here.

The procedure that followed wasn't nice but the recovery after was manageable, physically anyway.

How are you getting on? When's your scan booked for?

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 07:47

I have never heard of pre seed- what's that?
No more scans booked - just this blood test tomorrow.
I'm doing OK I guess :(

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BestBeastie · 15/01/2017 08:28

I know. It's really shit.

The odd however are not all against you. Whilst these aren't great, the likelihood is that you will get pregnant and carry to term.

Smurf123 · 15/01/2017 10:30

Hi, I had a mmc in August went for scan at 9ish weeks and were asked if we were site of our dates we did go back for another scan a week later to check if there had been any growth. We were told this was the only way to confirm (we weren't offered any blood tests though). Unfortunately it wasn't good news for us. I was fairly certain of our dates. I never had any mc symptoms and even after medical management nothing happened. Eventually I had to have surgical management. But I did had 2 more scans at every step of the way to be absolutely sure.
It was really hard for us as it was our first pregnancy. I certainly doesn't enjoy listening to its very common comments, although I know it's true and people are just trying to help!
Sending positive thoughts your way. I hope it works out!

MouseLove · 15/01/2017 10:35

Wait. You got your BFP 5 weeks after your last period. Your dates could be out by 3 weeks!! I'm sorry to give you a little hope but that lines up perfect with how you're measuring. Please insist on another scan before having any procedure done.

Pineappletastic · 15/01/2017 10:50

My cycle went all funny about 4 months after stopping the pill. My LMP before my pregnancy was October (2015), I conceived in very late December with no period since October. My daughter was born in September.

It might be a slim chance but I'd get another scan before having any procedure. Best of luck to you x

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:20

Thank you so much for replies :) MouseLove can you explain how you figure that one out? I'm a bit confused, having been thinking about it over and over

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:20

If you think it's best I'll definitely ask for another scan tomorrow

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:21

And Smurf I'm very sorry for your loss

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MouseLove · 15/01/2017 11:26

The reason I say this is because from conception to positive test it could be as little as 14 days. Even less. I've known people to get positive tests at 8dpo. So if you ovulated super late in that cycle there's a possibility. Did you get any negative tests before your positive?

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:28

I got two negative tests before the positive, yes. Is that good or bad?!

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IMissGin · 15/01/2017 11:33

Sorry to hear you're going through such a worrying time! How long ago did you first get a positive test? If less than 3weeks ago I'd say there's a chance

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:34

My positive test was in December IMissGin- as I say, I thought I was 10 weeks by now!

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IMissGin · 15/01/2017 11:37

So 5weeks ago?

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:38

Yes, 5 weeks ago now

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MouseLove · 15/01/2017 11:42

The negative tests make all the difference. Actually a good thing. How long before your positive did you get a negative? Sorry for all the questions. Just trying to work out a timeline. X

IMissGin · 15/01/2017 11:47

So adjustment for a late ov that cycle you could be 8-9 weeks rather than 10?

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PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 11:55

No, questions are great!
LMP on 4th nov
Negative tests on 4th and 5th Dec
Positive test on 8th Dec :)

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hopsalong · 15/01/2017 12:10

I have twice been able to get a positive test at about three weeks pregnant (day 21 of a 28 cycle/ 7dpo), so I guess it's possible that you were three weeks pregnant on Dec 8 (after ovulating late) and are eight weeks now? Don't want to give false hope, because a scan should show a heartbeat by that point, but it seems just within the realms of possibility that you have an ongoing pregnancy... Could you have another scan tomorrow? Did you feel the equipment/ somographer was good? I would think if no heartbeat then that probably the news isn't good, and the embryo has stopped growing quite recently. But definitely don't think you should treat as a miscarriage without another scan done by an experienced sonographer.

PollyCazaletWannabe · 15/01/2017 12:24

OK I will definitely ask for another scan, thank you :)

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